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Victor "Let off some steam, Bennett" L.'s Profile

Photo of Victor L.

"Now pretend she WASN'T in line for coffee..."

Review votes:
1838 Useful, 970 Funny, and 1670 Cool

Location

Brooklyn, NY

Yelping Since

April 2007

Things I Love

lamp

Find Me In

The Sandlot

My Hometown

Smallbany

My Blog Or Website

http://kingscountybop....

When I'm Not Yelping...

Eating Fruit Roll Ups

Why You Should Read My Reviews

I have no idea what I'm talking about.

The Last Great Book I Read

Men's Health

My First Concert

hearing "Paint It Black" by the Stones in my mom's 1996 coffee-colored Camry

My Favorite Movie

NOT NFL Films documentaries on Super Bowl 42

My Last Meal On Earth

dumplings dumplings dumplings

Don't Tell Anyone Else But...

I own Paul Blart: Mall Cop.

Most Recent Discovery

Showering.

Current Crush

Kalamata olives

Recent Reviews

1040 Reviews

Filter by: Location   Category
35-30 38th St
Astoria, NY 11102
(718) 766-2020

UA Kaufman Astoria Stadium 14  

Category: Cinema
Neighborhood: Long Island City

4 star rating
 1/1/2010  
I went here to see Avatar recently and was pleasantly greeted by two hooligan friends of mine.

The lobby is about as big as Central Park and the popcorn line goes slower than my high school dating situation. The theater set up was nice and the first few rows still were not at a horrible angle which was good. The theater was clean, and big, and there was parking on the roof.

It's within striking distance from the R or the N and the other best part was the deli on the way from the N/W at 39th was great because they had cheap chips, which I brought to the lobby and watched kids play in the arcade and chatted about James Cameron.

I didn't much care for the popcorn; it kinda sucks when it costs a buck fifty for those weird seasonings when you can get them all free at the Landmark Sunshine.

I think for those who are against bigger multiplexes, this is a good example of a slightly more isolated and really nice theater that because of it's space is not full of endless escalators and winding paths.

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4217 Queens Blvd
Sunnyside, NY 11104
(718) 361-9680

P J Horgan Tavern  

Categories: Restaurants, Pubs
Neighborhood: Sunnyside

4 star rating
 1/1/2010  
I LOVE the holiday decorations in this place. I knew there was something good coming to me when I saw Tennessee playing in the Chick-Fil-A Bowl (everyone knows that the only real WTF bowl is the http://Insight.com Bowl, WTF).

Queens Blvd. is pretty awesome in general. Horgan not only knows good food, but an amazing bathroom.

The bathroom's urinal, in the men's room, or the Gents room as they call it, has pennies. It is absolutely a wishing fountain of pee. There are exactly 4 dudes who have had their wishes granted due to this urinal.

The menu has basically everything you want: fried food, appetizers, big-ass onion rings, and gift certificates available to purchase.

I had the potato skins, even thought the potatoes were a little small, the good dose of baconage was delightful. I also had the fish and chips, which were only ok. The burgers looked pretty fantastic and the lentil soup was pretty damn good even though I still don't really know what lentil soup is. Every time I think lentil, I think of bean sprouts, and I'm not sure why.

Everything is modestly priced but if you grab a steak it can run you 20 bucks. Our waitress was very nice if a little casual with getting us the check.

The place itself is just a warm, inviting, well-lit atmosphere; the side booths are very cozy and I could easily see myself whittling away with friend(s). I would have to take the 7 train first, but I'd get there eventually. I had no idea there was actually an express 7 train with the diamond shape.

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623 Manhattan Ave.
Brooklyn, NY 11222

Irene's Place  

Neighborhoods: Williamsburg - North Side, Greenpoint

4 star rating
 1/1/2010  
This bar is amazing. After listening to Polish karaoke at Stones Tavern we figured we needed a drink before the Coalesce show at Europa.

I didn't even know the name of this place, but we wanted to go in. Inviting neon signs. A quiet place to have a whiskey soda.

Librarians wish they could enjoy the silence that was this bar. There was no music playing. There weren't even any creaks or strange noises. I thought maybe my hearing went, or I was in a silent movie. It kind of looked like your hardened, wacky uncle's basement from 1981. You know, the uncle that didn't really update his digs from '78. It's a really nice place actually; there's a huge jukebox where you can select some nice Polish music. there's a TV, playing a weird infomercial on dog grooming. There's mirrors behind the bar, so you can look at yourself being unattractive.

The bartender was a nice woman who served my whiskey and soda separate from each other, which was pretty sweet. With 3 dollar mugs and 4 dollar un-mixed drinks, this place is what I call a gold record.

There were 2 other people in the bar, not talking. Plus us made 5 people in the bar total. 5 people not talking is awkward. The bathroom had a very unique stench that was fascinating; it was sharp, like there was some sort of cleaning product mixed with some ribald cheese and urine.

Basically, this is a dream come true for a visible intersection in a prime area, a place where you sit with your thoughts and contemplate your week and think about nothing in particular without anyone bothering you, probably because they don't know English and you don't know Polish. Now if you do know Polish, and they actually do know English, the sentence I just wrote was just trying to be mildly funny. And it wasn't.

The one interesting thing to me was all the vodka bottles on the shelf were half full or even less, while all the whiskey bottles were near full or not even opened yet.

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120 Lawrence Street
Brooklyn, NY 11201
(718) 858-9400

Harry O's  

Category: Restaurants
Neighborhood: Downtown

4 star rating
 11/15/2009  
Harry O's is neatly (or not neatly) tucked away on a construction filled block of Lawrence (and stands to make lots of business if the new building across the street becomes inhabited, as the new tallest building in Brooklyn).

Being so close to me that when I first looked for it I couldn't find it because I didn't think it was that close, I walked in on a Sunday afternoon  to watch the games. There were several regulars in the spacious bar area, and the restaurant section is actually rather large, decorated very simply and old school, everything wood, white linen tablecloths, well lit, like something out of Bay Ridge or more suburban upstate.

I sat down at the bar and enjoyed a 3 dollar Yuengling and some cheap, really good chicken fingers (although I was hoping for some good sauces). The menu? Whatever was written on the chalkboard sign. The cook? Was the barback, which is awesome because he was just chillin' like a villain with the other patrons.

The bartender was very sweet, she was being celebrity roasted by Hatch, a good natured (although I freaked him out about a dream I had about Troy Polamalu) Redskins fan that was big enough to play linebacker for them. I guess they were good with each other from a while back.

There was a Steelers couple to my left, and two older gentlemen came in later and starting cursing about jobs, honor, and friendship. The jukebox every once in a while popped on a Sinatra tune which was kind of weird.

All the games were on right in front of me, it was quiet (save Hatch's grilling), and incredibly chill. While it doesn't have the overall warm vibe that Cody's has, it's super relaxed and definitely hidden to most.

The funniest thing? Hatch must have had a late night the night before, because he totally fell asleep at the bar at around 4:25 in the pm. The place was so chill that everyone just let him take a nap for about 20 and he went back to watching the games as if nothing happened.

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308 Flatbush Ave
Brooklyn, NY 11217

Come Out & pleY @ Ocean's 8 at Brownstone…  

Category: Local Flavor

4 star rating
 11/5/2009  
I was winging it. Get it? Get it? SHUT UP.

So what was up with the Zog Sports recreational co-ed problem children not only eating our wings but giving me weird looks as I waiting patiently behind them in line? SHUT UP.

Those bartenders were about as inept as you can get, although the usual vibe is probably much more relaxed so the last thing they may have expected was a bunch of loud farts like ourselves. WTF.

The place is about a step and a half from the subway entrance. GTFO.

It was a real Balls of Fury atmosphere over by the ping pong tables.

It was a real The Hustler by the pool tables.

It was a real buffet style by the pastas.

Seafood salad under a hot lamp FTW. Those clams were bacon!

Oh and pat b., don't call other Yelpers "ungrateful terds" (I believe the spelling is 'turd' but who knows) for rightfully picking out less than excellent points. The sun doesn't shine all the time.

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677 New Loudon Rd
Latham, NY 12110
(518) 785-7739

Nite Moves  

Category: Adult Entertainment

3 star rating
 Update - 10/26/2009  
I ran into an old high school classmate last St. Patty's day while waiting for a cab at the 76.

It was very late and she was in a track suit with a little clutch bag. She mentioned she was doing well and that she worked across the street.

I noticed the overt make up job and totally didn't realize what she was talking about for a few seconds.

She shall remain nameless, but it was an awesome footnote.

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1 Previous Review: Hide »

  • 2 star rating
    5/14/2007 First to Review

    Nightmoves is fitfully funny for many, many reasons. One, it's a strip club in the middle of Latham. Two, it managed to place an ad on the HUGE billboard, the only billboard, about 100 feet from Hoffman's playland, a kiddie amusement park, and right across the street from an upscale day spa/boutique plaza. Third, it's probably less than half a mile from 3 churches and the big junior high/high school establishment. In fact, it's down the road. Fourth, they have their own Hooter's type slogan board, which they send the C-team stripper to change every once in a while during the day (we know because we eat at the Taco Bell across the street and noticed this happening throughout high school). This slogan board or whatever you call it has coy sayings like, "Tell Your Wife You Went Shopping", or "Warm Up This XXXMas". Sixth, I got turned down when I was 3 months shy of legal age, I just walked in at 2am and showed him my real ID. The dude was the nicest guy on the planet, he just smiled and said "sorry man, but come back in August, when that happens you're more than welcome to kick back here." Seventh, there's discreet parking in the back so nobody will see your car. Eighth, you can have great sushi (Yoshi's) or terrible sushi (whatever that one is right next door) before watching this most depressing of establishments. Ninth, it's basically this small, unmarked building beyond the slogan board. Which means your imagination can only run wild, you perverts.

    Tenth, they don't serve alcohol, for all your straight edge fans out there. Eleventh, because of this, the dancers perform full-nudity routines. 12th, that's the law. 13th, all my old redneck friends STILL go here.

    14th, a girl from my high school class worked here. As a dancer (yes Ms. Lane, you). 15th, her mother (yes Mrs. Lane, you) worked here as well. AT THE SAME TIME. 16th, they have a smaller stage so if you don't like the main strip, you can avert your eyes to something even more depressing. 17th, I hope I don't get too much shit for reviewing this.

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350 5th Ave
New York, NY 10001
(212) 563-3433

YelptoberFest at Heartland Brewery  

Category: Local Flavor
Neighborhood: Murray Hill

5 star rating
 10/15/2009  
Aww pumpkin, I was just being a little Bratty, no need to put me in a fried pickle over it :)

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618 Grand St
Brooklyn, NY 11211
(718) 388-2114

Elite Event @ Bushwick Country Club  

Category: Local Flavor
Neighborhood: Williamsburg - South Side

5 star rating
 10/1/2009  
Those carrots in the potato salad were cut fabulously.

I love how Yelp asks me while I'm writing this, "Good for kids?"

I'm checking yes on that one.

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9603 101st Avenue
Ozone Park, NY 11416
(718) 323-3300

The Quiet Man  

Neighborhood: Ozone Park

4 star rating
 9/19/2009   First to Review
This is a bar that made me notice something kind of awesome.

If you are way out there, like this place, where really only regulars go, and it seems like busy equals about 20 patrons, and there's discoloration on the walls, and just a rough smell of it, you think, oh the place must be totally wonky in terms of it's bathroom right?

Wrong. This place had a really clean bathroom. I had the shadow and I felt no worries doing duties in there. It's because it's only regulars, and they don't want to mess up the bathroom of their favorite place. It's a wonderful thing.

Barcelona, who was the bartender, was very sweet and had snazzy French manicure and dressed about a decade younger. The bar was lit well enough so you could see people, but not well enough that you felt warm.

The real reason, as my friends Josh and Jess (who live in the neighborhood) to go is, DJ Mike hosts karaoke fun times every Saturday night. You don't even understand how awesome this karaoke is. "Spider" Jones took us through Baby Got Back, every word without looking at the lyrics screen, and then pronounced that he was showing everyone he could rap even though he was a middle aged white dude with long hair. He had a Jets colored Jeter jersey and a backward cap that was just the stuff of legend.

Then there's Virginia, and she took us through the sweetest rendition of Baby Come Back. Lots of babies here. DJ Mike looked like he liked life at some points, then maybe hated it at others. It was just such an interesting karaoke session, because it wasn't a bunch of young people doing it for kitsch, it was neighborhood blue collar people absolutely getting down with some serious power ballads. And some of it was horribly bad.

If you ever find yourself so out of the way, you're going to have to try it. You can't miss this place on the busy strip; it's got a white exterior and interior, and the inside once had dreams.

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675 Hudson St
New York, NY 10014
(212) 699-2410

675 Bar  

Category: Lounges
Neighborhoods: Meatpacking District, West Village

4 star rating
 7/20/2009  
I've got the cautious optimism...I would normally give 3 stars but the 4th star is really because in this particular area, they do things slightly differently and that is commendable. It's like a bit of Williamsburg chic came to MPD chic and that's what you got.

It's really more of a 3.5 stars kind of place for now. The best thing about this lounge is the place itself, the brick, the separate rooms, the uncrowded direct path to the bathroom (so rare). Plenty of places to park, etc.

Oh and 4 dollar Miller High Life bottles in the lower Meatpacking? That's a good option. While the pints are small, I was enjoying the Peak Amber Ale as well.

If you're going to get a cocktail, you might as well do their 10 dollar menu drinks because you'll save two bucks on just ordering a cocktail off the menu, or at least that was the case with a gimlet.

If you get here early, it's a wonderful spot. Like I'm talking 10pm. It's really nice, not crowded, super chill. Even as the night wore on and the crowd really started to pour in, the service was excellent. In that area, you never get nice people. All the staff was incredibly polite, and that deserves 3 stars on it's own.

Basically you wait in line (again, get there early, they supposedly have a low max capacity so things don't get ridiculous), can wear sneakers, and get downstairs. There's the carved out recesses/rooms on the right side with the main lounge area with coffee tables and seating on the left, with the bar at the far left next to the DJ. Your path straight ahead is the bathroom and it's always uncluttered, it was so nice.

My problem was with the crowd that showed up on Friday later on, I was kind of half expecting the dream to be over as when you have a cluster of bars with a similar crowd (this area gets so many negative points for pretention) unless the bar is worlds away in demeanor you will have overflow. A lot of the dudes were a bit old for the clubs and a bit orange. The women were actually a nice mix of different styles and ages. There weren't too many hipsters here, but if this place were anywhere else, it'd definitely take on a different patronage.

The key thing is, people felt comfortable here. Even the d-bags weren't ruining much with the exception of a jorts-sporting young'un shaking her business a bit too close to our space. We're talking inches.

I would love to see this place on a weekday night; hopefully the music won't be blaring quite so loud (if you're going to do away with the Level V club, at least manage the volume).

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