Danielle "Part-Time Model" K.'s Profile

This is where it's at.

Y'all don't know a good thing when it's biting you in the butt!

But, enough with the shenanigans. I'll get down to the nitty gritties.

First of all, the restaurant is way nice. So seeing prices like $10-$16 was one of those facepalm moments. Am I back home where $10-$16 is FINE DINING?!

Then comes the chips and salsa. Clearly both homemade (although I wish the chips were warm), I almost jumped for freaking joy when I saw that it was pico-style salsa. PRAISE JESUS. None of this from-the-jar shiznit that is denasty and EVERYWHERE. Real tomatoes! A little spice! Delicioso!!

Both my friend and I got tacos, some of the cheaper fare. Three tacos, on HOMEMADE tortillas (for real, awesome!), lots and lots of meat, rice and beans. Really, solidly good. I settled on the pulled pork tacos since they didn't have carnitas, and I'm not a fan of tomatillo sauce. The adobo was delicious although not very spicy, and it made a huge mess.... And I'm not sure what's up with the East Coast and putting pineapple on their Mexican, but I'll go with it. There was pineapple atop these tacos, and it bugged me, but it was still pretty good.

My friend got some regular pork tacos, which I almost got, and probably should have, because all the delicious cabbage, cilantro, and cotija--all of which cancel out the tart tomatillo sauce I was avoiding. Sad panda!

Beans and rice were great.

Also, if you ask for hot sauce, they'll bring out like 12 different bottles, which was fun to sample, but I did sort of wish that they made their own. Oh wells! I'm still thrilled with this place. Too bad it's a solid 45-minute drive.

O...M...G.

If you like artisan beer, you might have to restrain yourself. Really, I can't believe I had no idea this place existed.

See, I'm still getting used to New York's liquor laws, which in many ways seem a lot stricter than the already strict Oregon liquor laws, and I still think it's kind of weird that you have to get wine at a liquor store, but while you're there, you can't pick up a brewski, too. I don't drink much beer, so it didn't immensely bother me, but sometimes when that craving hits, you want to pass on the Coronas, the Heinekens, and the Bud Lights. You need something more. Something that CLEARLY only Brew Crew can offer.

When I walked in, I was struck by the sheer ginormosity of this place. Literally a Costco of beers. Floor to ceiling. In the refrigerated cases. From the tap (if you feel spunky enough to get a gallon at a time). Long aisles full of countless ciders (YESSSSSSSS!!!), brews that circumnavigate the globe (all over Europe, Asia, and probably more!), and guess what? OREGON MICROS. Holy crap, you have no idea how happy that made me. They had shelves and shelves of Rogue and a few other brands, and even a Rogue on tap. However, I noticed that these were pretty expensive--like around $7 for a 24-ish-ounce bottle. Is it worth it? Prolly.

Then imagine all these beers and stuff...cold. I mean, the warehouse was chilly already, and smelled sort of like the way beer smells after it spills on the floor and you don't mop it up. BUT. Check that refrigerated section if you're planning on taking your beer and having it immediately go to your stomach.

A. MAZ. ING.

Nice staff, although my friend was looking for limited-edition Fall Woodchuck, and they were all out. Sad times. Good thing they had lots of other stuff for us to fall back on!

Touche, Albany.

This stuff is as good as middle-of-the-road Portland Mexi. Which...which...is pretty awesome for Albany!

Like I said, TOUCHE.

First, margaritas. Damn. I'm pretty sure that was fresh lime. And not completely cheap tequila. And they were strong. DK approves.

The menu was quite extensive, and my friend ended up getting three tacos (a chicken, a chorizo, and a barbacoa--which, did you know, is actually GOAT meat?!), and could barely down two. They looked really good and quite huge. But I suppose this should be expected at $3 each. But then again, that's Albany's version of dirt-cheap. She also said the tomatillo sauce was wicked awesome.

Then I've been noticing that most places, if they serve mole, it's always with like a half-chicken and then it costs an arm and a leg. They had that ($15), but then they had my fave mole enchiladas (saving a solid $4, at $11), and I wholeheartedly approved this, too. The sauce was on the sweet side, but it was far from bad. The chicken was awesome. Not sure how I felt about a meager serving of black beans (instead of the guilty pleasure of refried) and the HUGE pile of rice. It was all good, though, and I'm still full, which is great!

Also worth noting, the chips and salsa. Pretty good. I think they make their own chips, but they weren't hot when I got them. However, they still were good. As was the salsa. YESSSS.

I'm def. coming back.

Finalmente, I should add an extra star because the view of the server walking away was...guapisimo.

Touche.

Hehe, I kicked some ass at darts.

The crowd here was more my speed. No more lame-o frat boys with popped collars. Just beer and the jukebox. No frills, obvs.

And that huge tequila shot.... Thanks, guy.

Also, we made a few new friends over the darts. Did I mention how I totally won that game? Yeah. I don't even know how to play darts. HAHA!

While I wouldn't normally make a big deal about this stuff unless it was nast, but the bathroom was SOCOOL. I can't even describe it. It had mirrors and primary colors and some cool industrial sink. Meliked. A lot.

I'll totals come back.

DO NOT WANT (the following):

- A 10-minute long line to use the ONE facility toilet labeled as unisex because the dude bathroom was "out of order"

- To stand in an uber-small bar portion, where other people bump into you

- To get hit on by kreepers right after leaving the bathroom

- To have said kreepers try to persuade you that they are local celebritards, then proceed to tell your friend that she's sexy and ask if they're going to make out, or what?!

- To have the bouncer force you to move from the booth to the bar, where there is no seating...or space

- A nast burrito

- The sorostitutes who kept on using their obnoxious flash-cam to take MySpace-style pics of them shooting gang signs or doing the kissy-face

This will not be a place I'll be frequenting, but I suppose I should be glad to get that experience over with....

While the cider here was excessively drinkable, and the popcorn excessively free and abundant, and the Captain Morgan's girls wearing excessively short skirts giving out free shots, there was something missing.

Not many places to sit, but maybe that's the way these bars are supposed to be. A few pool tables and some darts are clearly obligatory, but...but....

This place is too popular, filled with the excessively preppy frat crowd. By the time we left, the front portion was so crowded, we could barely get out. Someone poured beer all over my friend's sweater. And the floor was nast. The bathrooms also proved problematico. Exceptionally small, with saloon-style foldy doors. Two stalls, but no standing room for waiters. Not a good sitch to find yourself in.

I'm sure I will find my way back here sometime, though. We had fun desipite the crowd and stuff....

It's been awhile since I've indulged in Indian food. I love it. I love the naan. And the daal. And the palak paneer. And the chicken tikka masala. And the butter chicken. And the tandoori chicken. And the samosas. And everything else.

So I was more than happy to drive a real long way tonight for my friend's going-away party (hey PDX Yelp--she's coming to YOU!).

This food was quite delicious.

And the service was quite nice.

But HOLY CRAP this place is expensive. Okay, I've hashed this out before: I. AM. A CHEAP. BITCH. I am sosick of spending $15+ for a meal out here. That means I'm even sicker of seeing a menu that's chock full of $18+ entrees. DEAR. GOD.

I got some chicken tikka masala and a mango lassi, and after tip, I shelled out like $28. This cheap bitch that works part time and is paying student loans can't afford this!!

Granted, I have some delicious leftovers, but really? The portions were not generous enough to justify a plate of $18.50 chicken. Ditto that with the $3.75 lassi. I mean...damn.

Also worth noting, they didn't give us nearly enough rice. Sadtimes.

I've seen a lot of Indian restaurants around Albany, and I really wonder if they're good. God knows they have to be a LITTLE bit cheaper (back in Salem, Oregon, there was India Palace, which gave a humongous meal--samosas, tandoori chicken, naan, daal, the crispy things with chutneys, rice, an entree, and dessert--for $15. I miss them).

I'll give Zaika credit though; they divided up an enormous check without one complaint.

Okay, so there's more to this story. And now that I'm simply tired but not TOO tired to write a review, I'll press on.

Now, Priceline never came through in fixing their big-ass mess. The dealio was, I reserved a "smokingfree" room on their site, and ended up with a dank smokING room instead. The Super 8 staff said, in so many words, "HELL NO. We will NOT give you a different room because you ordered through a third-party website, and we don't have to honor that reservation!"

Fair enough. But still asinine. I wasted probably an hour or more on hold between the next two days trying to get Priceline to fix it with their guarantee. No avail. They DID discover, though, that even though the receipt clearly said "king/smokingfree wireless internet/continental breakfast," the word "smoking" went with the word "king" (so a king room, smoking), and the word "free," which was clearly attached to "smoking" instead belonged with "wireless internet." Was I supposed to know this through osmosis? So they refused to attempt to fix it or even give me a small refund. They said, "Go ahead. Go to another hotel. But we do not offer refunds." Needless to say, I then wrote an angry email, to which I got the response, "Please call us at your earliest convenience." Suckered into thinking that they would then resolve this issue once and for all, I was once again left on hold with an unsympathetic agent who continued to tell me there was NOTHING she could do, especially since I had stayed there overnight. I sent another angry email. I got the same one back. I didn't call because clearly it was a ploy for them to waste more of my time.

But all this seems besides the point. Super 8 is not Priceline, and it's not their fault that Priceline clearly does not have a copy editor, and clearly does not give two shakes of a donkey's tale about clarity and accuracy.

What is NOT besides the point, though, is the utter nastiness of the motel. Like I mentioned in my last review [whilst in the throes of despair], the carpet was filthy, the walls stained with something brown and drippy, and I had to call upon the infrequently used shower flip-flops. The bed felt like laying on a piece of plywood, and the pillows and towels reeked of smoke. Thank God the window opened.

But imagine this...you take a shower after a long day, only to grab a towel that is saturated in smoke-smell. I don't know about you, but I don't prefer to smell like a cigarette right after bathing. I think that's a huge leap backward.

There are hardly any electric outlets. I had to unplug the clock to plug in my laptop, and I had to hope my phone wouldn't run out of batteries.

All of these are just leading up to the kicker. Which is...

...my friend couldn't get a room of his own the second night we were there, so he wanted to get a cot. Before we left for the day, we asked the front-desk dude, who said, "Okay, you'll have to talk to housekeeping, and it'll cost you $10." First of all, APPALLING. A $10 fee for a frickin' cot? Well, he was willing to do it because the carpet was gross.

We come back later that night and ask the lady at the front desk for a cot to be delivered to my room. She looks on her computer, tells us the motel is full, and there are no more cots. I laugh in utter disbelief at how ridiculous this all is turning out to be. Then I ask her for a spare sheet. At least he could lay on top of my comforter, and have a sheet goddamnit.

She replies, "Well, we're really full. I'm not sure if we have any more. I'll go look."

She's gone in the laundry room for a bit, and returns with a few blankets and a pillow. How nice, I think.

We get up to my room, and my friend unfolds the blankets, and they are literally covered in cigarette burns. Like, someone used this blanket specifically for putting out cigarettes. I don't know about you, but that's what I call unacceptable. And gross.

We were both too tired to bitch further, but needless to say, I refuse to go anywhere near this place again. Between Priceline's jerk-offiness, the staff's douchebaggery, and the utter filth....well....I'm just happy I didn't leave with some sort of rare disease.

I'm slightly afraid to be the first to give this place five stars.

But.

Dare I say it?

This was probably the single best meal I've had since moving away from Portland. Yes, it's a little on the spendy side, but it's "normal" for Albany standards--meals coming in around $13-$16. But I was extremely pleased by the portioning, so I didn't feel totally ripped off.

I got their special fish tacos with grubber fish, or something, and even though the tacos came with rice and not beans, I can forgive them because those tacos were SO. GOOD.

HOMEMADE corn tortillas. I DIE right there.

Deep-fried fish (okay, I probably would have preferred it grilled, but still), and LOTS of it. Three BIG pieces per taco (and there were three big tacos).

Habanero slaw. SO GOOD. Sweet and spicy. Crispy and fresh. Perfect combination with the fist.

I wish this place was in Albany. Also, seeing that mole was on the menu, I took a leap ordering the fish tacos at the recommendation of our server, and I really was not disappointed. That's huge right there.

My dining partner got the cochinita pibil, which I'd never heard of before. It was some sort of orange-juice-marinated pork with a chili sauce, cooked in a banana leaf. I tried some, and YOWZA. Seriously. It was awesome!

Then of course, we got a Modelo Especial and a Negro Modelo. Can't remember the last time I had a nice Especial!

One note, though. For the price, I'd hope that there would be unlimited chips and salsa action (and that since the tortillas are homemade the chips would be also). However, you get a super-duper small basket free, and each subsequent one is $1.50. They also only bring you water if you ask.

Even so, I'm still thrilled by my meal, and am sort of regretting eating my leftover taco an hour ago. Because I want it now.

I had ball soup today!

(First of all, get your head out of the gutter.)

Second of all, this is particularly hilarious because when I was a little girl, my mom gave me an old pot and plastic spoon to play with. When my Papa came to visit, I'd make him sit at my little girl table, and instead of playing tea party, I'd put a plastic playground ball in the pot, stir it around, and then we'd feed each other ball soup.

Okay, this stuff wasn't exactly the same, but I did have a nice little jaunt down memory lane.

I've never had soup like this before, but there was a hunk of tender and delicious beef, a few yams, and a big ball of ground and (presumably) fried plantain. It was good. And exceptionally different. And the avocado salad was tasty. And that mango smoothie? OH YEAHHH!

There were lots of things on the menu, none of them exclusively Mexican (and the owners are Ecuadorean, so take THAT!), but it all looked pretty good. In a setting that was very reminiscent of the taco carts and little burrito places back home. I will be back to try the tamales.

This is one place that I'm actually excited to return to.