brittany b.'s Profile

i came in today with a broken heart and two broken vintage slrs. my two favorite vintage slrs. the bottom piece fell off my minolta while it was in my hands and my konica's film advance broke off as i was taking a photo. he fixed my minolta in two minutes flat, simply adding a screw that was missing. he was so fast that i didn't even see him do it. then he didn't even charge me for the repair! i'm getting the konica back on tuesday, so maybe this review is a bit premature. also, he said maybe ten words to me the whole time i was there. what a nice guy.

i thought i accidentally walked into the mens bathroom because there was so much piss on the toilet seat. every stall! i think the last time they cleaned this bathroom was around the time i was here a month before (attempting to make a joke; not implying that i pee on toilet seats)

the only good thing about TA is that it's attached to the most holy of del tacos in all of california. and apparently it's easy to steal from. not that i would ever do such a thing.

i enjoy my sugar with a side of coffee. its probably all the sweetner, not the caffeine, that hypes me up in the morning. so i kinda felt like i didn't know myself anymore when i drank an entire cup of coffee from four barrel without adding even a hint of sugar. it was SO fucking good. seriously, i've never had coffee like this before in my life.

the bathroom is pretty rad. you will see it after drinking copious amounts of delicious coffee. also, pretty sure they only play records here, which is kinda cool.

i've got some qualms with this place but... i've never been anywhere (other than here) that i've seen jellyfish sold for $16! and thats kind of where my hesitation comes in..

so yes, there are a ton of beautiful, exotic fish here. yes, it's very visually stimulating. and yes, it's a cheap alternative than going to the aquarium of the bay and i might even say better, but that's not saying much for the aquarium (it sucks). but this place is as uplifting as a nursing home. you're definitely going to leave sad.

said beautiful and exotic fish are overcrowded into very small tanks. it's visually stimulating because this place is crammed with as much aquatic life as possible (it's not a big place). two separate occasions i came in (weeks in between) and i saw the same shark swimming upside down in a tank that was beyond inadequate for his size. sharks swim upside down when they are under stress. fuck, i don't even know that much about sharks and i knew that. why don't the owners?

bored this morning, i was clicking through the "random articles" on wikipedia and i got the article for green apple books! i forgot all about this place!

my ex-boyfriend lived on 3rd so we'd usually wander into green apple books after getting coffee. i don't think i have to elaborate too much on why this place is so awesome. just look at all the 5 star reviews! i guaranteed if you check it out, you will find something you like.

the asian guy that works here is kind of hateful about life and really frugal with ketchup packets. a minimum of four! what the fuck is that about?

you will be hassled by at least one homeless person when you come here. guaranteed.

i came here for the first time last night for a show. its across from the west oakland bart station, kind of a sketchy area. but.. it's west oakland, so whatever. what else would you expect? i just met angie, the bartender, and she was really nice. $2 pbr and tecate. $3 for the speciality beer, whatever that is. my friend bought me a pbr and angie was nice enough to cut up some lemon for us. what fine customer service. they have free snacks! and they allow dogs! and there was a really drunk dude that could have been my dad dancing to the band. they were really good, by the way. i wish i remember what they were called.

this "one hour photo" is a joke. it wasn't even an hour! he asked me when i wanted to pick up my photos. i thought it was implied at a ONE HOUR PHOTO that i wanted my photos back in ONE HOUR. he said my three rolls of film would take longer than than that. two and a half hours, actually. does walgreens not anticipate multiple people bringing film? this must be why i always have to track someone down to help me at the photo counter.

it was raining. we were hungry. so we stopped here.

the pros about this place:
- theres a half naked lady painted on the wall
- one of their salsas is named "drunk salsa"
- one really giant burrito

the cons:
- yeah, it's a giant burrito, but all the "veggie burrito" really consists of is some refried beans and mexican rice. i guess the single carrot i found in the burrito is supposed to justify this?
- kind of confused about the review that says there's an $8 minimum. i used my card and i'm pretty sure i paid $7 and some change. regardless, $7 is pricey for one tortilla, a scoop of beans and rice and a carrot. a small bowl of chips came with the burrito, but thats like, what? a fried tortilla? why does this warrant almost eight dollars?
- you only get two small containers for salsa. i have mixed feelings about this. it's definitely not enough salsa for a burrito and chips, but i must admit, i can get salsa happy sometimes and get more salsa than i end up actually using. i don't like being wasteful and i fucking hate plastic, so i'm going to let this one slide. they'll probably give you another container if you ask, anyway.
- beans and rice are on the softer side, right? so what exactly did i find in my burrito that was white and crunchy and gave me a tooth ache for the rest of the day?

i came to laser quest on a quasi date with a boy. i can't really say if its worth the price, since i didn't pay for it, but if other reviews say its expensive maybe you should swindle a boy into taking you here like i did.

we arrived to laser quest and the last group was about to go in. god damn it. i guess we're not pregaming in the car. this was my first date after breaking up with my boyfriend of five years and also the first time in a very long time that i spent with a group of teenagers. so for obvious reasons, i really didn't want go through this experience without alcohol.

the barely legal kid working at laser quest thought it was appropriate to announce the rules of the game in a very poor excuse for a british accent. so basically i didn't hear any of the rules. i think i heard him say not to grab another players gun, a rule that every teenager broke. i only saw the dude i came with twice while we were playing, so it might be best to come with a big group, like those fucking teenagers did.

the game ended and we were back in the dark room we started in to remove our gear. as i was taking off my vest, i felt my gun make contact with what i thought was another gun. until i heard a teenage girl say loudly, "you just hit my mom!" had i heard the rules in clear, concise english, i would have known that you weren't supposed to remove your vest until you were near the hook you removed it from, you know, to avoid hitting someones mom in the face.

i ended up doing terrible. like, i was actually a little embarassed when my score was read aloud to all the teenagers. whatever. so you kicked my ass at laser tag. I CAN DRIVE A CAR.

then things took a bizarre twist. date boy and i were minding our own business, playing air hockey, when another barely legal employee approached us asking if we liked magic. he then performed a series of magic tricks. talk about a cock block. i was slighly amused at first, but his tricks became progressively lamer and it seemed impossible to break away from his clutches (maybe his magic was better than i thought?). once we escaped, date boy and i drank in my car and bonded over our very strange ordeal. i realized i am not the type of girl that needs to be romanced with lasers. just take me somewhere i can drink without the presence of minors and i'll be happy. your chances of getting some might be a little better too.