Michelle "Pimptastic Waterloo" H.'s Profile

They have this very informative poster on the counter. It tells you of all the health benefits of a plain baked potato. Then gives you ways to make that healthy spud into the embodiment of gluttony by topping it from everything from steak, chicken, cheese, and anything else imaginable.

Even though I haven't partaken in one of the baked spuds, I really do love their french fries, especially with a dash of the seasoning salts the have on the counter. The steak sandwiches? Meh.

Did you ever just have one of those days? Even in the middle of summer, your stomach is twisted in knots, the boss decided today was the day to take their anger out on you, and you just want to get the hell away, but only have an hour for lunch?

I found a bit of peace in a cup of soup. Yeah, who knows how many times the Soupbox and it's tasty wares have come to my rescue. Nothing soothes my nerves and stomach like a cup of home-style chicken noodle. Or Lobster Bisque. Or chicken and dumpling. Or Italian wedding. (OK you get the picture, I haven't run across a bad soup yet.)

Unfortunately, I still find almost $6 for a cup of soup and a roll to be a bit on the pricey side. Maybe they have to up charge because of the amount of packaging they use. Styrofoam soup cup in a brown paper bag, and inside of that brown paper bag, a white paper bag with utensils and your bread. Packaging overkill! But every time I've been here, the same guy has been behind the counter. I can't say how much I enjoy his pleasant personality. . It goes well with the soup!

I loved the huge tropical fish tank that spanned the length of the dining room.  I enjoyed watching the fish way more than I enjoyed my dining experience here.  

Located inside of the Bass Pro Shop, the restaurant itself is bedecked with nautical themed items.  Model boats, rudders, anchors, and of course a mounted swordfish adorned the walls. Fake palm trees in the corners, and calypso music playing in the background.  Reminded me of an upscale (well a little more upscale) Red Lobster.

Now on to the food and service.  I had phoned in a reservation the week before for a party of nine.  So we were seated promptly (there was a pretty good crowd there for a Sunday afternoon.)   So we were seated and greeted by our server.  Not that she wasn't efficient throughout the whole ordeal, but she took her job very seriously, which unfortunately came across as rather angry.  For appetizers, we had alligator nuggets, and potato chip nachos.  The nachos were good, but the alligator nuggets blew.  You could taste nothing but the overwhelming and salty batter in which they were fried.  For the main course, I ordered the red snapper Reuben sandwich.  What makes a Ruben, a Ruben, you ask?  My opinion would be the sauerkraut.  But unfortunately, when received, my sandwich was lacking it.  And instead of Swiss, I received cheddar cheese.  So it turned out to be a snapper sandwich with cheddar and thousand island dressing.  Very disappointing, as was the cole slaw our server had raved about.  It was more like shredded cabbage and carrots with vinegar.  But the key lime pie we all shared for desert was very good, and I'm not even a big key lime fan.  I think it was the graham cracker crust that really did it for me.  

I don't see myself returning here.  The food was only average, and the prices a bit too steep.  (I felt that I was paying tourist prices to eat in my own town.)

I still love this place for a good, sit-down Italian meal.  But just recently, I had the experience of their banquet service for a wedding.  If one were to go here for this alone, they may leave relatively lacking.  

The food lacked it's usual tasty flair, the appetizers and main dishes just very bland.  The service, I must say, was rather stellar.  The bride and groom also opted for a champagne fountain.  Well, I assume that what it was.  It was a big, hulking, metal contraption near the appetizer station, surrounded by rocks glasses.  It was horribly dented, and didn't really resemble a fountain of any sorts.

I really do enjoy a lunch from Panera.  But a special message to this location: Get your shit together!!!!!!  

I went in there the other day, around 2pm.  The lunch rush was over, and there were maybe about five or six other customers waiting in line.  But you couldn't tell from the amount of time it took to even place the order.  My order was relatively simple.  A bowl of French onion soup and two pieces of baguette (I love the baguette more than life itself.)    

So I waited another ten minutes, and get my to-go order.  Look in the bag, no baguettes.  So I wait some more to get someones attention.  I let them know I need my baguettes.  Well, they were out of baguettes.  (Why I wasn't told that when I placed the order was beyond me.)  So I was told I could have an apple or chips instead, and not in a very polite manner.  So I snapped back, and said that if I wanted an apple or chips, I would have ordered that.  And then wanted to speak to a manager.  
Me:  Could I possibly have my money back from the two baguettes I ordered?
Manager:  Um, I could give you an apple or chips instead.
Me: Screw it, give me my money back for everything.  And take your apples and chips and shove them up your ass!!  (Actually, the last part was what was going through my mind, not verbally exchanged.)
Manager:  Well, OK, if that's how you're going to be about it....

Yeah, that's how I'm going to be.  I just wanted what I paid for.  Too bad there isn't another location closer to work, or I would head there.  So it's getting two stars.  Just because I know if they had baguettes, I would have been happy.

My favorite location in the summer months for a caffeine buzz and people watching while I'm on my lunch break.   And, if the train isn't running too late, I'll stop here in the morning too.  I have always preferred Caribou over Starbucks, and this store is no exception to that rule.

The staff here is always on the ball, cleaning up messes, keeping the bathrooms surgically neat, and still managing to remain upbeat without going overboard.  And they always have cinnamon sugar donuts in stock.  I love me some of them donuts!

This place runs like that proverbial well oiled machine.  Even when there is a line stretching on for what seems to be forever, I've never had more than a five minute wait during the lunch rush.  And with such volume of customers, fresh pans of food are constantly being brought in.  

But it's during the non-rush periods that this place can sometimes disappoint.  Yes, the service is still friendly and quick, but the quality of food is severely lacking.  The chow mein and rice gets dried out, and they only have one or two main dishes available.  As much as I like their orange chicken, (which they always have) I would like to try other things on the menu.  

Still not bad for a quick and cheap lunch in the loop.

This place looks much smaller and run down from the outside.  I was hesitant to come out at all, since the weather that night was pretty shitty, but after enough cajoling, my friends talked me into it.  Well, despite the weather, we stood in the entrance way waiting for our friends to arrive.  I guess there is some sort of drainage problem which causes the water to pool up in the entryway.  So, it was squishy, for lack of a better term.

Once everyone gets here, we enter the building.  All you see is a single bar, poker machines, a small stage area, and some private booths.  Everything has seen better days.  (But this place has the pool-hall, gin-mill musty kind of smell, which I happen to love.)  The bartender greeted us immediately, and since we were there for the Karaoke, we asked her when it began.  She looked troubled as she told us that it was canceled due to the weather.  After serving us our drinks, she told us to hold on, while she went and talked to the owner.  Well, I don't know what the owner did, but the now smiling bartender came back in saying there would be someone to run the Karaoke here in about an hour.  It was just such a nice thing to do, especially when the majority of my group was pretty vocal about their disappointment over the cancellation.

And as we all settled in (wow, the little booths against the walls are really comfortable) I now saw the hallway that led to an additional bar area; so the place is actually huge!  And there is a nice outdoor covered area where we could not only smoke, but also bring our beer out.  That's always appreciated!  

So needles to say, we had a great evening singing and drinking.  The only thing is, they have a broken ATM.  I asked the bartender about it, and she said it has been broken for the last two years.  I then asked if they accept credit cards, and if I could run a tab.  To my surprise, they did on both counts!  This is not a place I would think they would do that.

You know those places that are sometimes found in the middle of nowhere?  The little unnamed diner that serves up killer hash browns?  Well, this place isn't one of them.  

I had my heart set on finding a great breakfast in the ass crack of Illinois.  But I was rather let down. ( Considering the drive only took us a half-hour, I can consider my home halfway to the ass-crack of Ilinois)  The drive here took us past gloriously landscaped Statesville Prison, (complete with the warning signs every half mile telling us not to pick up hitchhikers,) and if you blinked quickly, you may just pass up the entire Crest Hill area.  The restaurant itself was located in a old and used up strip mall, with a very small sign.  

We came in here on Fathers Day (yeah, I can blame this breakfast trip on my Dad), and it was rather crowded, but seemed to turn over customers rather quickly.  

The menu was extensive, but nothing to spectacular or eye catching.   One of our party, deliberately called the waitress over to place her order ahead of time.  She was ordering a Dutch Baby, and it takes a bit longer to cook, so we figured all of our food could come out at the same time, and not have to sit around while the other cooked.    I thought that was a pretty good move.  

So the waitress kindly said she would put the order in ahead of time.  So she then came back and proceeded to take the rest of our orders about 10 minutes after that.  Well, I can't say what happened after that, but either she never put the order for the Dutch Baby in, or the cooks never started it.  I'm not going to lay blame.  But the food was sitting under heating lamps for a good ten minutes, until the Dutch Baby appeared.  Which caused my cheese omelet to develop a peculiar kind of crust, which was very disappointing.  

So I was underwhelemed with my food, and upset that I had to wait another ten minutes for my toast to be brought to the table.  So it was just not a happy-breakfast time for me.  So no, my dreams of finding heaven in Illinois ass-crack have to be saved for another day.

Dear Young Woman at the Front Counter:

You know what, honey.  I worked in fast food all through high school and a little beyond, myself, so I understand.  First I know that you are not thrilled to be at work; I can understand that, and even emphasize with you.  Secondly, I realize that working there plays hell on the skin.  But what I don't want you to be doing is picking and popping your pimples while taking my order!!!!!!  And then touching my fries!  Honey, that's just not cool.
Thanks,
Feels Bad For You

Seriously folks, these were not minor pimples either.  These were the big, gushingly visible whiteheads.  I was just horrified there for a moment, and ended up not even wanting the food I ordered.  But since this is the closest to work, and every once in a while curly fries with horsey sauce strike my fancy, I probably will be back.  Call me a bitch, but next time, I'm saying something.  Besides that, despite the small area in which this place is located, they do a great job with order turnout.