mike "mikelite" l.'s Profile

Walker did the catering for a friend's party and the food was amazing. Fresh, bright & flavorful. So, I was psyched to hear he was opening his own joint. We went Friday night & I'm calling it right now - Walker Stern is going to be a celebrity chef & Battersby will be a destination. Is it there right now? Not quite, but that day will come.

I was expecting Battersby's menu to be more casual. but it's actually quite refined. Almost to the point of feeling intimidating. I felt a little intimidated, I'll say it. But, the staff is so friendly, they gladly walked me though. At the bottom of the menu, in small print read "Spontaneous chef's tasting menu avialable upon request." Sign me up!

We started with a quick amuse - radishes with some delicious dipping dressing. Next we got some homemade bread and butter. The bread tasted like a fluffy, crusty ciabatta with some sea salt sprinkled on top. After that was an oyster shooter in this delicious soup of something heavenly.

Next, the dishes got bigger, but fell off in enjoyment. The scallops & citrus were gritty and mostly flavorless. And the cod right afterwards almost drove dinner off a cliff. But, the chicken dish really blew us out of the water.

Wait, did I just say a chicken breast  was the savior of the night?! holy shit yes. This was the single most amazingly prepared piece of edible matter i've ever inhaled. The wife & I were chatting chatting chatting (probably about the annoying table of richipsters next to us) and then took our first bites at the same exact time.

and then silence.

We both looked up and just shook our heads in amazement.

So, 5 courses in and we're both exploding with food. Then comes dessert. We started with a little shooter of fennel panna cotta with a tiny dollop lemon citrus something on top and a few fennel hairs for good measure. It was also amazing & subtle & rich.

At this point, our stomachs had rearranged their contents to make room for the panna cotta. Then the hostess brought over the slice of olive oil cake with some delicious creamy side.

I had clearly transformed into a well-fed food zombie, because I don't remember stumbling home. But I do remember that chicken.

finally made it back for actual food and the only reason they added a star was because they managed to get everything in one bag. Surly service, bland pho and no tripe as promised. Plus, they've got a sign above the register that says "Eat shit & die" actually it says "We reserve the right to refuse service anyone we fucking please" (I might've added that last part) but seriously, why be that confrontational?

No reason to go back.

We had an awesome lunch at Agra. The lunch special was perfect - great flavors, a bunch of different dishes on one plate and perfect service. Plus, we got to sit at the open window, overlooking Lex.

So, why am I giving them one measly angry star? The wife & I don't eat a lot in one sitting, so we tend to have a fridge full of leftovers. When we got home after a day in the city and tore into the leftovers from Agra, we saw the morons drained all the delicious curry sauce from all the meat dishes & crammed the veggies, cabbage & rice into the same container. All of the dishes that had such great robust flavor are now worthless.

I've reviewed almost 30 Indian places - I LOVE INDIAN FOOD! I WAS REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO MY LEFTOVERS but you tools ruined a great lunch & 2nd lunch.

it's not fair, I want my lamb curry back.

/pout

I am an Apple Fanboi. I believe in their stupid products and love their fine attention to details. Other people tinker with cars or widdle, I have my MacBook, iPad & iPhone. With that in mind, I have a strict No Case policy when it comes to my iPhone. It's a thing of solid beauty to hold in your hand, why would you want to encase it in a thick, ugly, clumsy case? Well, because shit happens, like your thing of beauty of slipping from your fingers as you try & take an HDR photo in Chinatown.

A little part of me died that afternoon. But thankfully Bradley was able to make it better. Brad's not the most loquacious of gents, but he did do a bang up job replacing the screen on my iPhone. All it took was one hour & $90.

p.s. if you're curious, here's the photo I sacrificed my screen for: http://goo.gl/yunWa

My landlord finally acknowledged that after six months, our back door wasn't gonna fix itself & I should find someone that could actually do the job. ServiceMagic gave me a few prospects, but only Tal from Astro actually followed up. He called within a few hours, was able to come out the next day to check it out and even came early to the appt. Even though he was more expensive than another bid, I wanted to go with Tal since...well, he just felt better, know what I mean? He gave off a better vibe. He just felt professional and reliable. And right now, the door is fixed and he did a killer job in under an hour. Great stuff, highly recommended.

I was headed down here anyways, but the 20% off trades made me punch the air with excitement. YES! I exclaimed in my head, before I realized I was talking to myself on the subway platform.

Anyways, Chameleon is small & packed with stuff. Not a good packed either - where you spin around & discover all sorts of new goodies. This place is overcrowded, with books & toys blocking other books & toys. Inventory for trades is pretty light, so I was in & out without doing any major damage to my wallet. But, if you still read actual comics, or buy old baseball cards, then you should be in good hands.

Crepe wraps are a great way to take a step away from the everyday standbys - sandwiches and salads. But A) they're pre-made & stacked on the counter and B) there wasn't any chicken in my chicken & goat cheese wrap. Actually, I take that back there was chicken dust in mine.

blech.

We step inside abistro and get stared at. "What the FUCK are you rich hipsters doing in my neighborhood?!" What a way to start our Fort Greene day trip than with daggers.

Customers & cooks aside, the waitress was wonderful. Thankfully I resisted the urge to run back to Smith St, because the food was great. I had the fish and grits and the wife had the fish sandwich. The grits were unreal and the fish was like Hill Country Fried Chicken - perfectly crispy & flavorful, but no where near greasy. Fish sandwich was essentially the same thing minus the heavenly grits. I'm eating it now, in fact.

You know, I looked around and it's not like we were the only honkeys at the Apollo. We were the least hipstery people there! Welcome to the neighborhood, try the fish.

In a neigborhood of old-fashioned (and bland) Italian food, Brucie definitely wants to be something more. It wants to be authentic but still relevant. Williamsburg cool, but also old-timey and real. A grocery store but also a restaurant.

From the moment we walked in, got looked over but not actually acknowledged, the staff never seemed to care more about us than they did about their beards or black tshirts. One waitress must've been having a bad night because she was hacking away at a loaf of bread like it called her fat. Our waiter was...fine. That dress looks...fine. Nothing particular wrong, but also totally uninterested. Another chubbed out, bearded dude only wanted to gossip. Hey hipster, you're distracting my waiter, go back to Twitter.

Someone put a lot of work into Brucie's ambiance. Everything felt perfectly cozy and neighborhoody until I noticed the Ball jar lights. That totally cracked the fourth wall for me and everything started feeling fake. And the music. The wife nailed it when she said it sounded like a college house party. Brucie, what are you - a warm neighborhood restaurant or pasta night at a Tappa Kegga Brew?

Speaking of carbs, I had the spaghetti & meatballs. The pasta was definitely fresh, but the dish as a whole was unremarkable. Not terrible, just fast and overpriced. The tagliatelle with ricota, brussells sprouts & burrata was fantastic. BYO has been replaced with a pricey & limited drink menu. A $12 glass of something next to a Bud tallboy. At least it wasn't PBR.

I think Brucie is the guy that can't grow up. It's 8th yr senior, still hitting on sophomores. Basically, it's Will Ferrell's career. Just like you can't carry two conflicting thoughts without getting a migraine, Brucie's contradictions left us feeling unsatisfied, confused and reaching for the Excedrine.

this place has bad bad karma. It's poorly run and overly chaotic. Plus, the owner covers the prices on the menu so you've got no idea what you're gonna be charged when you get up to the rude cashier. $37.50 for  a bagel with cream cheese? Well, it says it right there - underneath the black tape. With such an amazing location, it's a total missed opportunity to be the center of the neighborhood.