Paul "The Professional Fat Kid" d.'s Profile

I went for a going away party and was blown away at the atmosphere.  The band that was playing was rocking out the blues guitar and people there were dancing their asses off...It was great to see a place like this in the valley...

I rated this place just on the atmosphere, considering I didn't order any food or libations... Definitely a good change of pace if you can aren't looking to grind to KIIS.FM or PWR 106...

I went on a second Tuesday night of the month apparently that night belongs to a particular band...If you have any good ol' folks from the country that are visiting and home sick, this would be a the place to take them....

It's really hard to mess up shabu shabu...It really is...You have to make sure your meat is fresh, cut just thin enough, serve with fresh vegetables and make sure the water stays hot...

I mean really...How do you mess something up where your patrons literally cook their own food?!

Let me tell you...

HORRIBLE HORRIBLE SERVICE.

That's it...That's how you do it...

When you have servers ignoring customers, messing up birthday reservations, having servers and managers completely mess up orders because they can't stop looking down someone's dress, having burners that failed, serving other customers that have come in 20 minutes after you've been sat with the same order and then just blowing people in your party off?  

How does a place with this kind of service survive in Hollywood?  At the price you pay, wouldn't you think that service would at least be 3 star? At LEAST?!

The worst part of this is that I even tried again...I went for a second birthday and disaster again ensues.  All of us attending swore we'd never step foot into this establishment again after ruining TWO birthdays...

I guess the one star they get is for the fact that they served food that was edible...

Ugh...Every time I drive by this place my first thought is, "Horrible overpriced bland Chinese food."

This is the typical Chinese place in this area that gets away with horrible Chinese food because the people in this area don't know any better. Once again, I may just be super spoiled with my Chinese restaurants in Chinatown, off the 10 or off the 210...I wouldn't step foot into this place to get Chinese food...

If what I read from a previous review is correct, I will have to investigate the secret menu and edit this post...

I went in there not really knowing what to expect.  All I know is that they had the best hot sauce I've ever had.  I asked what he was using and he said it was a secret blend, but there were definitely habaneros in there...

Everything I had ordered came out okay, but the hot sauce definitely brought out the flavors in the meat much more intensely.  From what I heard from my wife and now in reading past reviews, this place was the ish with previous owners...

I don't care about previous owners, I care about now, especially with that hot sauce...I gave this place an extra star based on the fresh and original hot sauce...

People think I go here for the convenience...Hell, I live 7 minutes from this place...But I think not...

I don't know about the rest of you, but I do my research when I get into things...Prices, ratings, comparisons, efficiency, accuracy, you name it...I want to get the most out of my dollar when I buy equipment...

Short of buying wholesale, ANS got me off on the right foot and rarely do they not have something that I'm looking for...Their prices are right down the middle of retail, but they have surprised me with some sales and kick some major ass with their price matching...

The other half of the store is airsoft and that side is always busy too...I can't really review that portion since I don't normally partake...

More than often, I find myself with a lot of other people getting in, asking for something, then having one of the guys that works there ask what color they want it in or if they want a 14 or 16...Their stock is expansive and whatever they don't have, they have delivered to you in 15 minutes if you want to wait...The employees there are also paintball/airsoft players, so their knowledge base is on point...Their tech is pretty speedy too, but I have yet to give him an electronic gun to mess with...

If I only had one gripe about this place, it would be that they don't have discounts on bulk orders of paint... Not enough to knock off a star, but something to consider...

I've been to a few Mongolian BBQ's in my day...Majority of them being all you can eat, I always get what I want...

This place is actually the first Mongolian BBQ place I've ever been to...I showed up about five years ago, probably not sober, wondering "WTF" as I stepped into the restaurant the first time...I thought to myself, "Interesting concept..."  The Mongolian BBQ places started sprouting around all over the place...

Flash forward to now, three stars is just about right for this review...

You ever go from driving a four cylinder car to a six?  That's pretty much how I felt walking into every other Mongolian BBQ... This place has the bare minimum of selections for your typical BBQ...

Pretty standard selection when it comes to ingredients, but you're missing some key ingredients...

Where is my TOFU?
Where is my TURKEY?

So many other Mongolian BBQ places went out of their way to get their fourth star...Usually some kind of other food served along side, less stipulations on serving sizes, take home boxes, less expensive, more than one grill...Decent service and bare minimums will get you a three star rating...

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't complain about going, it's just not in the upper tiers of Mongolian BBQs or even restaurants...I still thank them for the wonderful introduction though...

I'm really particular about my ribs...I've always held such a high standard thanks to none other than my dad...Beef ribs, baby back pork ribs, short ribs, spare ribs...

Come on, I'm the freaking Professional Fat Kid...

I walked into this place like with the same mind set as I always do with new places...No bias, no fear and no abandon...I'm a professional and I take my practice very seriously...It was kinda dark...Kinda swanky...Just what I expected in this hole in the wall on this side of town...But still, I must maintain my professional composure...

I went straight for the beef ribs...My wife (?!?) does the same, requesting extra marinade...Apparently, she's been here before...This does not phase me...Them claiming to be a Texas BBQ and not having sweet tea, however, did...You can't claim to be Texan and not have sweet tea...However, this is minor...

I also decided to go against the protein grain and order cole slaw with my baked beans...

It wasn't long before I had baked beans, cole slaw a loaf of bread with whipped butter and beef ribs all piled in front of my face...

It is on...

These were some pretty huge ribs...I had to pump the breaks because they just came off the BBQ and piping hot...I buttered my bread...I set my self up for ruthless efficiency...Drink on the right, sides on the left, buttered bread placed on bottom to soak up any marinade and the spicy BBQ sauce on top for any unexpected dry moments...

This is where the waitress informs me,

"If you have any ribs that are hard to get through or are really tough, you just let me know and I'll swap them out for some fresh tender ones..."

WHAT?!  You're giving me a tender meat guarantee?

GREEN LIGHT!

As I tore through the first 4 ribs, I was confused at why there was any need for this guarantee?  I just started to break into the meat sweats and I hardly needed my teeth to pull the meat of the bone or to even chew!...Oh em gee...I'm getting the meat high...The beans were probably the best I've ever consumed in my life, complementing the marinade perfectly...Cole slaw...Ehhh...Saved it with pepper...Tried the wife's potato salad and realized that next time, there will be a double order of these beans...

Approaching food coma, we immediately wash up and pay the bill before the inevitable nap that's going to make us crash on our way home...

I must say, I haven't consumed this much meat since I went to Lawry's...Probably didn't help that I ate 3 of my wife's ribs too...

Make sure to wrap the bones up for your dogs...They will go CRAZY over these things...

Now you're wondering why I didn't five star...A few reasons...

No sweet tea...That is key...
Parking is not nice...Definitely not enough spots...
Outdoor bathroom...Not good when both arms have marinade dripping down them...

All in all, a great place if you're el carnivore...

When was the last time you met honest salesmen?

I don't know how often you guys run amok the vehicle dealership scene, but these guys were by far the best business I've ever had the pleasure of dealing with.  I recently was in the market to buy a bike and their sales guy Jimmy just had a genuine love for motorcycles.  He never asked me how much I was looking to spend or threw me a sales pitch.  He was all information... I told him about how I had other offers and actually suggested to me that I should take a bike from someone else!

They may have not sold me a bike, but they did sell me their business buy being knowledgable, friendly and not pushy.  Dealing with Jimmy over the past couple weeks, I bought a helmet at a great price, found a place to do maintenence, got a lot more information on frame sliders, have a place to swap tires and found a business where I feel comfortable with asking dumb questions.

The only gripe I have is that they are closed Sunday and Monday...That's not enough to take them down a star...

Seriously, EFF snow cones...

To anyone that that tries to pass off a snow cones as Hawaiian shaved ice should have their snow cone shoved up any orifice below their waist...

Hawaiian shaved ice is a beautiful, fluffy experience that has a wonderful effect on your tongue...Snow cones are coarse, crunchy crap that you get at  second rate fairs...

Tutu's is the only place I've been to that still does Hawaiian shaved the way it's supposed to...Light, fluffy and HUGE...They don't skimp on the syrup either...If I can recommend a flavor, I'd have to go with blackberry...Experiment...Play around...

The Dole whip is also a wonderful palate cleanser that is just amazing...Whipped pineapple soft serve is probably the best way to describe it, but I would say the best way to know it is to experience it...

They also have ice cream brought in from Hawaii...

Being that I was stationed in Hawaii and I trolled around to get as fat as possible before I returned to the states, I must say that Hawaiian ice cream is super rich compared to their mainland counterparts...White chocolate, coconut and macadamia nuts?  Yes please...

Did I mention they have free Wi-Fi?

I could hang out here all day...

Ask about the hall of fame...If I didn't have to worry about living for the next few years, I'd be on that wall already...

Normally, I'm not a big fan of Japanese and Korean BBQ places because I don't see why you would go to an established restaurant to cook your own food...I guess you're paying for convenience...You could go to a store, buy the meat for a fraction of the price, soak in marinade and have a BBQ...I got myself hyped for this place because my buddy renounced his vegetarian ways and wanted to make up for the last 9 years...

So the thinking when this way...

Another all you can eat Japanese barbeque place? Sweet!

In the newly upgraded Topanga Mall? WAY sweet!

For 44 dollars?...Uhhhh...Is there a Hot Dog on a Stick around here?

Definitely not for the BOB (Baller On a Budget), as I know I've seen other all you can eat Japanese or Korean BBQ places charge around $20 a head...Granted that doesn't count the beer, sake, soju or whatever your libation of choice is...I must also say that their happy hour serves a decently priced beer and rice wine martini, but the money you save is going to go to the $40 price tag...

Parking is at the mall, so you shouldn't have any problems with that.

My buddy and I got there during lunch, so I have no idea what seating is like in the evenings...

I do have a gripe about the actual seats with their dividers...I like to have secluded booths, not a shutter divider...It just seems weird...

Not a bad place, but I'd venture other BBQ places before heading back here...

Be sure to read the fine print on the menu too..."All you can eat" really means "All you can eat for 2 hours if everyone at the table orders the same thing..."

Just make sure to read the fine print...Or get drunk enough so you don't care...