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Location
San Francisco, CA
Yelping SinceFebruary 2006
Things I LoveLove, Radiohead, Muse, Cabernet Sauvignon, Sushi, Falafel
Find Me Inconspicuous, with a monkey wielding telekinetic, pie-making abilities.
My HometownHonolulu, HI
My Blog Or Websitehttp://keane.festizio.net http://twitter.com/kea...
When I'm Not Yelping...Monkeys aren't burdened by labor laws,
Why You Should Read My Reviewsand Costco sells bananas at $0.40/lb.
My Second Favorite Websitehttp://www.festizio.net http://www.myspace.com...
The Last Great Book I Read(HP, Kite Runner, East of Eden, Catcher in the Rye)
My First ConcertFinally, telekinesis allows Mr. Squiggles
My Favorite Movie(Amelie, Pan's Labyrinth, Motorcycle Diaries, Layer Cake)
My Last Meal On Earth- his name is Mr. Squiggles -
Don't Tell Anyone Else But...to deliver said freshly-baked pie without laying his grubby mitts on it.
Most Recent DiscoveryBecause no one wants a monkey touching their pie before they eat it.
Current CrushThat's just common sense.
Date
Pier 39
San Francisco, CA 94133
(415) 981-6300
San Francisco, CA 94133
(415) 981-6300
Eat, Drink and be Gamey Yelp Elite party @ Players
Category: Local Flavor
Neighborhood: Fisherman's Wharf
4001 18th St
San Francisco, CA 94114
(415) 621-6940
San Francisco, CA 94114
(415) 621-6940
Kasa Indian Eatery
Category: Indian
Neighborhood: Castro
Every now and again a friend introduces you to a new substance you're probably better off not having. All's fine and well until your cravings hit again, and you find yourself wanting to sneak back to the joint, buying enough to service a small army, and shooting it in the back of some dark alley.
For me, it's the kati rolls at Kasa Indian Eatery. We both had lamb and chicken rolls with egg and they were satisfying. It went down so nicely with a bottle of 90 Minute IPA.
Also, the cocaine was pretty good.
For me, it's the kati rolls at Kasa Indian Eatery. We both had lamb and chicken rolls with egg and they were satisfying. It went down so nicely with a bottle of 90 Minute IPA.
Also, the cocaine was pretty good.
198 Guerrero St.
San Francisco, CA 94103
(415) 861-0198
San Francisco, CA 94103
(415) 861-0198
Mission Beach Café
Categories: American (New), Breakfast & Brunch
Neighborhood: Mission
I address thine holy writ in the Church of Bacon by declaring mine prior failures in executing the sacred rites, for I have come to confess...
Dearest Bacon,
I dare not sprinkle thee o'er every dish.
I doth not sizzle thou slices in the morn.
I doth not wrap mine dogs with you.
(Alas, I am a health eater and am not accustomed to your ways.)
With the sacrament of porky penance I attend Mission Beach Cafe to baptize and cleanse myself of prior bacony sins and eat the salted slivers of the culinary savior where others doth congregate and proclaim thee the best.
Sweetly caramelized in the name of the pepper, you hath filled mine orifice with glories. With poached egg and homemade English muffin you hath lain thyself well upon my palate. Perfectly prepared, you be.
And while I may not attend thee regularly, dearest Bacon, I hope thou doth not attest thyself neglected, for my love for thee shall never falter. And like most Catholics I know, I shall see thee every so often and on Christmas and Easter, and, you know, when I have some free time or something.
Dearest Bacon,
I dare not sprinkle thee o'er every dish.
I doth not sizzle thou slices in the morn.
I doth not wrap mine dogs with you.
(Alas, I am a health eater and am not accustomed to your ways.)
With the sacrament of porky penance I attend Mission Beach Cafe to baptize and cleanse myself of prior bacony sins and eat the salted slivers of the culinary savior where others doth congregate and proclaim thee the best.
Sweetly caramelized in the name of the pepper, you hath filled mine orifice with glories. With poached egg and homemade English muffin you hath lain thyself well upon my palate. Perfectly prepared, you be.
And while I may not attend thee regularly, dearest Bacon, I hope thou doth not attest thyself neglected, for my love for thee shall never falter. And like most Catholics I know, I shall see thee every so often and on Christmas and Easter, and, you know, when I have some free time or something.
I have a lot of old journals lying around. When I find them, I'm taken back to another time, as if I were viewing memories from someone else on an old television set inside my mind.
I found my review of the Met, a museum I absolutely adore. If there was one museum I could visit right now, it would be this one. Huge galleries of all sorts of historic, amazing displays. Words cannot describe the wonders you'll see here... though apparently I tried at one point. How best to put to paper the enormity and magnificence of this celebration of humanity's cultural evolution?
---
MET
Don't bother trying to learn anything. You'd never see it all in one day.
Learning is overrated, anyway.
---
I apologize retroactively for being such a dumbass.
I found my review of the Met, a museum I absolutely adore. If there was one museum I could visit right now, it would be this one. Huge galleries of all sorts of historic, amazing displays. Words cannot describe the wonders you'll see here... though apparently I tried at one point. How best to put to paper the enormity and magnificence of this celebration of humanity's cultural evolution?
---
MET
Don't bother trying to learn anything. You'd never see it all in one day.
Learning is overrated, anyway.
---
I apologize retroactively for being such a dumbass.
I consider myself imbued with an exceptional level of refinement. An international man, I find pride in having dabbled with cultures, French, Italian and assorted Asian.
A little factoid from someone better than you: Le Club means "The Club" in French.
You're welcome.
So when I'm invited to a super exclusive party at a super fancy lounge, I raise my chin (higher) and respond with an ambivalent, "maybe." Between entertaining my dozens of lady friends and buying bureau sets online, I'm a busy man. My silk socks won't sort themselves, you know.
Le Club is a pretty space. A pretty small space. With an ambient bar area and a couple of side rooms, it's ideal for upscale entertaining. The neighborhood is prime, with Grace Cathedral a block away for late night romancing.
But I'm between payments on my various European sedans, so I really can't justify $40 for two house wines and a well. If not for the earlier open bar, I'd have hailed Jeeves for a car ride home already. At least the lines of crushed pharmaceuticals there are already paid for...
A little factoid from someone better than you: Le Club means "The Club" in French.
You're welcome.
So when I'm invited to a super exclusive party at a super fancy lounge, I raise my chin (higher) and respond with an ambivalent, "maybe." Between entertaining my dozens of lady friends and buying bureau sets online, I'm a busy man. My silk socks won't sort themselves, you know.
Le Club is a pretty space. A pretty small space. With an ambient bar area and a couple of side rooms, it's ideal for upscale entertaining. The neighborhood is prime, with Grace Cathedral a block away for late night romancing.
But I'm between payments on my various European sedans, so I really can't justify $40 for two house wines and a well. If not for the earlier open bar, I'd have hailed Jeeves for a car ride home already. At least the lines of crushed pharmaceuticals there are already paid for...
Of all that Stanley Park offers in trees, flowers, harbor views and totem poles, my favorite memory was of the swings in a tiny playground near the rose garden...
I don't know if you've recently "swung" - or if you're so past childhood, the word conjures images of swapping bodily fluids in a dark basement - but it's the definitive carefree experience. Like gliding through air, with a cool breeze brushing your face, you can't help but smile. Even my parents tried it and looked as if they were twenty years younger.
http://www.yelp.ca/biz...
Swing, swing, swing...
I don't know if you've recently "swung" - or if you're so past childhood, the word conjures images of swapping bodily fluids in a dark basement - but it's the definitive carefree experience. Like gliding through air, with a cool breeze brushing your face, you can't help but smile. Even my parents tried it and looked as if they were twenty years younger.
http://www.yelp.ca/biz...
Swing, swing, swing...
748 Van Ness Ave
San Francisco, CA 94102
San Francisco, CA 94102
Philz Coffee
Category: Coffee & Tea
Neighborhood: Civic Center/Tenderloin
I love Philz. God, how I love Philz.
I'm pretty sure if Jesus came back and converted water into another darker liquid, it would be Philz coffee. Turkish or Philtered Soul, black like my heart. The only thing that can make this place better is if it were closer to me.
Enter, the new Van Ness location...
Five caffeinated, jittery, going-back-in-effing-time stars.
I'm pretty sure if Jesus came back and converted water into another darker liquid, it would be Philz coffee. Turkish or Philtered Soul, black like my heart. The only thing that can make this place better is if it were closer to me.
Enter, the new Van Ness location...
Five caffeinated, jittery, going-back-in-effing-time stars.
1525 Mission St
San Francisco, CA 94103
(415) 621-7007
San Francisco, CA 94103
(415) 621-7007
Yelp's Mixtape Extravaganza @ Sloane!
Category: Local Flavor
Neighborhood: SOMA
Woo, Tatiana J. is the winner!
"This was my first Yelp event, and it was great! The "mixtape" I got was quite interesting... from its title, I was expecting European Trance, but to my surprise, it is not even close! Whew. I got the "Keandlenium Megamix Ultvaman Summer of '09 Club Deluxe Remix." One hell of a title! (P.S. I looveeee the movie Once. Golden.)"
The title also included the word "Monkey" in there somewhere.
"This was my first Yelp event, and it was great! The "mixtape" I got was quite interesting... from its title, I was expecting European Trance, but to my surprise, it is not even close! Whew. I got the "Keandlenium Megamix Ultvaman Summer of '09 Club Deluxe Remix." One hell of a title! (P.S. I looveeee the movie Once. Golden.)"
The title also included the word "Monkey" in there somewhere.
1 Previous Review: Hide »
-
10/14/2009
Apologies in advance to whoever got my mixtape.
Radiohead. Muse. Portishead. Great Northern. Xu Xu Fang. Bjork...
Have fun sobbing your eyes out tonight, you crazy drunk.
Neat space. Great rum. Thanks, Ruggy!
3663 Park Road
North Vancouver, BC V7J 3G3
Canada
(604) 990-3755
North Vancouver, BC V7J 3G3
Canada
(604) 990-3755
Lynn Canyon Suspension Bridge
Category: Hiking
Neighborhood: Lynn Valley
I'm starting to really miss the time I spent in BC. Maybe it's because it was the limbo between my routine life and my current unemployed life, but for a week I was off every grid there was, and that was pretty refreshing.
When I think back, my favorite experience (by far) was hiking through Lynn Canyon. We drove up Lillooet Rd and parked on the side opposing the Ecology Centre. It was actually great because we could walk through the woods to the Suspension Bridge and also go by a different trail to see the peaceful Rice Lake. The views are gorgeous, the waters are beautiful and the bridge is free - unlike the $30 Capilano Suspension Bridge.
It was also my first experience with an outhouse. I can finally - truly - understand that old Abe Simpson quote now: "This elevator only goes to the basement... and someone made an awful mess down there..."
Don't feed the bears.
When I think back, my favorite experience (by far) was hiking through Lynn Canyon. We drove up Lillooet Rd and parked on the side opposing the Ecology Centre. It was actually great because we could walk through the woods to the Suspension Bridge and also go by a different trail to see the peaceful Rice Lake. The views are gorgeous, the waters are beautiful and the bridge is free - unlike the $30 Capilano Suspension Bridge.
It was also my first experience with an outhouse. I can finally - truly - understand that old Abe Simpson quote now: "This elevator only goes to the basement... and someone made an awful mess down there..."
Don't feed the bears.
499 9th St
Oakland, CA 94607
(510) 251-8770
Oakland, CA 94607
(510) 251-8770
B Restaurant & Bar
Category: American (New)
Neighborhood: Old Oakland
Going out to dinner with Ligaya T. makes one feel like a celebrity's non-celebrity husband. All you have to do is sit there, smile and nod, and the whole world still knows you're the luckiest guy alive.
So I get to pretend I just married for money as I bask in her Yelpy glow while imbibing amazing cocktails (thyme? amazing!) and large, lean cuts of duck breast and halibut cheeks. The flourless chocolate cake with coffee ice cream was an amazing finish, creamy and lightly salted to accentuate the intense flavors of cocoa.
Cozy and quaint. I may just have to come out to Oakland more often...
So I get to pretend I just married for money as I bask in her Yelpy glow while imbibing amazing cocktails (thyme? amazing!) and large, lean cuts of duck breast and halibut cheeks. The flourless chocolate cake with coffee ice cream was an amazing finish, creamy and lightly salted to accentuate the intense flavors of cocoa.
Cozy and quaint. I may just have to come out to Oakland more often...
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I got here an hour late and seemingly entered what Wonka must have envisioned an arcade to be. Pure madness. Yelpers running around with armfuls of tickets and buckets of coins. Booze, booze, booze. On a mission. Get out of their way (please).
I never really got to hit the arcades growing up, so this was a real treat for me. Granted, a lot of things stopped working after an hour of hectic abuse, but I still got to do my rounds.
And while I tried to sort it all over skee ball and some Asian racing game, I decided I would be better off just getting more of the drinkies. The food was pretty tasty and the staff was friendly, so hanging around just chatting was actually more fun.
A freaking madhouse and I loved it.