JW "Only kills YOUR hype" D.'s Profile
DatePortland, OR 97214
The High Dive
Category:
Bars
Neighborhoods: Southeast Portland, Central Eastside, Buckman
Portland, OR 97201
(503) 227-5571
Unitus Community Credit Union
Category:
Banks & Credit Unions
Neighborhoods: Southwest Portland, Downtown
There are no forms.
There's a table in the middle of the lobby, I guess because people expect it to be there. But there's no little stacks of color coded paper that bean counters love for the audit trail they create. Apparently Unitus says "sucks to your audit trail" because here all you have do is walk up to the counter with your negotiable instrument and tell them what you want to do with it. I have to show an ID because, y'know, they don't freaking know me. Then I sign an LCD pad and BOOM I'm gone. With money. Pretty sweet.
Portland, OR 97211
(503) 922-3675
Siam Society
Categories:
Thai,
Asian Fusion
Neighborhoods: Northeast Portland, Concordia, Alberta Arts District
Wow, not even a hello, aren't you a snooty word-that-starts-with-B.
That happened this past summer when we tried to use a Groupon the GF bought. That wasn't even the reason I got chased out, I got hit with a blast of bad attitude tot he face the instant I walked in. I felt like I passed through a portal to Manhattan or some other fancy pants black turtleneck poop chute that does things like "reservations". P'shaw.
Fortunately for Siam Society we still had the damn Groupon so we figured we may as well go back some day. I was really looking forward to a blistering one star review so full of invective a thesaurus would be required. You see from my rating this did not happen.
The guy who greeted then waited on us was friendly and helpful. The food was tasty and the portions were generous. I got the yellow curry and I had to force myself to stop eating because I was becoming uncomfortably full. It took us a while to get our check because the dude seemed like he was the only person on the floor, but shit happens, that's a fairly minor quibble.
What's not minor are the prices here. Without the Groupon this would have been a fifty buck night, and on a street rotten with Thai places that's just not gonna bring repeat business.
They have a happy hour, so we will likely be back for that.
Portland, OR 97217
(503) 719-4508
Paxton Gate
Category:
Home Decor
Neighborhoods: North Portland, Boise, Mississippi
Got someone who's watched too many Tim Burton movies on your gift giving list? Hit up morbid town for some impaled endangered butterflies, or turn your kid into the school freak by picking up the entire series of plushy dissected critters with knit innards.
Portland, OR 97205
(503) 227-5253
Kalé
Categories:
Japanese,
Vegetarian
Neighborhoods: Southwest Portland, Downtown
Portland, OR 97255
(503) 241-3373
Tom's First Avenue Bento
Categories:
Japanese,
Asian Fusion
Neighborhoods: Southwest Portland, Downtown
I'm waiting for a Japanese fried chicken bento with brown rice to cool, which is kinda hard. It's pretty damn good, and it's just sitting there, calling out to me. But I hate mouth burns.
Not only are their wares top notch but they will come out from behind the counter when someone at the register is dragging ass. No, it wasn't me and I don't mean the girl running it, either.
The line can be off-putting and they're only open 11a-5pm. But if you can get there it's worth it.
Portland, OR 97223
(503) 233-3663
Violetta
Categories:
American (New),
Burgers
Neighborhoods: Southwest Portland, Downtown
Also, don't believe the single dollar sign. It's spendier than that.
Portland, OR 97204
(971) 266-8944
Freshii
Categories:
Fast Food,
Mexican,
Sandwiches
Neighborhoods: Southwest Portland, Downtown
Been here twice now as it's near my work. I got a chicken caesar wrap that wasn't very caesar-y and a teriyaki bowl that wasn't very teriyaki-y. Freshii, yes, qualitii yes, tastii, ehhhh.
I'll probably be back, the staff is nice and the service is quick, but I'll probably have to get extra whatever.
Portland, OR 97209
(503) 221-1938
REI
Categories:
Outdoor Gear,
Sports Wear
Neighborhood: Pearl District
WHY AM I SWEATING MY ASS OFF EVERY TIME I COME IN HERE?
No, really, this building is so stuffy and overwarm it's physically uncomfortable. I know you're all earth friendly and shit but turn on the God damned air conditioning!
They need more staff. Even half clueless dolts in green vests are better than standing around for ten minutes with a display shoe in your hand because the staff is getting hammered. There are very few easy questions in this place, so you better put the answerers out there. Especially if it's the last day of a big sale.
1 Previous Review:
-
1/30/2009
Quite a while ago a friend of mine got into rock climbing. And when I say "got into" I really mean "caught some disease that induced obsession". He was so into this strenuous and potentially expensive habit, he got a job at REI for the employee discount.
I'm pretty sure this still happens. It's the Occam's razor approved explanation for how the service can be inexplicably worthless. Let's review some of the things that have come out of REI employees' mouths. And my responses in brackets.
I don't know what a boonie hat is. [Wha...?]
Well, nylon's not waterproof. [Dumbfounded look]
We're out of that (starts to walk away). [Do you have anything LIKE it?]
But the other half of the time you can find patient, knowledgeable people who will practically hold your hand while looking for a lightweight windbreaker you saw on the website and can NOT for the life of you remember what it was called, who made it or what it looked like. Hey, we're all THAT GUY/GAL sometime.
So feast or famine service and generally expensive prices? What's the salvation?
The return policy is bring it back.
That's it. That's the ENTIRE return policy. All you need is a receipt. Unless you're a member, then they can look your purchases up so you can forget the receipt. SO worth the $15.
I took back a Gerber multitool that I had clearly abused just to ask if they could help me with the repair (not return) process through Gerber. The person directed me to the service desk where they GAVE ME A NEW ONE.
GAVE ME A NEW ONE. They didn't even ask me what the hell I did to break the pliers off at the jaw.
This is how things can be without the subhuman vampires called stockholders draining the life out of a company. Sorry, ranted a bit there.
Vancouver, BC V6Z 1L3
Canada
(604) 633-0056
Granville Room
Categories:
Lounges,
Restaurants
Neighborhoods: Downtown, Granville Entertainment District
The bartender was friendly enough until he started hanging out at the other end of the bar for some reason.
I almost ate shit three times on what were probably small spills. What IS this floor made of?
$7.50 for just enough Bushmills to wet my tongue? Wow.
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"Haulin' ass gettin' paid!"
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2382 Useful, 2354 Funny, and 1916 Cool
Portland, OR
Yelping SinceJanuary 2008
Things I Lovekilling YOUR hype, hashbrowns, koalas, McDonald's, hatred of all things good & pure, jaywalking, writing, Krav Maga
Find Me Ina drunken stupor. Sometimes. Maybe.
My HometownHere, baby
My Blog Or Website When I'm Not Yelping...wandering from bar to bar
Why You Should Read My ReviewsI'm both the sh*t AND the bomb.
My Second Favorite Website The Last Great Book I ReadFlora Segunda by Ysabeau S Wilce
My First ConcertSweaty Nipples
My Favorite MovieBlack Hawk Down or Shakespeare in Love
My Last Meal On Earthmy own tears
Don't Tell Anyone Else But...JW isn't really my name. Or initials. But I've always wanted a nick name.
Most Recent DiscoveryTop 40 radio is WAY better than modern rock radio.
Current CrushAnne Hathaway
THAT DAY HAS COME! It came about a week ago and my dumb ass was shivering on the cold asphalt of the Hawthorne pod because I left my coat here.
My boys Bob and Ryan opened this place, so you hafta take my word for it that if it sucked I wouldn't be doing them the favor of entering it in Yelp.
It doesn't suck.
It's a medium sized space so new it still smells like wood. The beer selection is carefully considered (altho they have Rainier instead of PBR, boo!) and both bar dudes have plenty of wrist and shoulder strength to prevent critical underpours. The kitchen is, well, you can bring in cart food! I can't make any promises but if you're a good tipper they may even allow trips to Burgerville, but don't get pissed at me if they don't think that's as good an idea as I do.
As of this writing there's no sign, but I saw the banner they were going to put up. Go see if they've got it erected yes.
(oh yeah, I said that)