Theda "Austin Yankee aka Miss Theda" S.'s Profile

This is McDonalds? If not for the familiar smell of egg muffins wafting through the air, I wouldn't have recognized you with your Eames egg chairs, wi-fi and ultra modern styling.

I walked past a few times and noticed several gringos eating rotisserie chicken and platanos so I figured it wouldn't be too hard to navigate the menu with my high school Spanish and point to any items i couldnt pronounce.

Worked for me but, not so much for the woman behind me who didn't speak any Spanish at all. She had a melt down and cursed out the counter girl for getting her order wrong and for not speaking English. "This is America, we speak English here mother funker..." went the tirade. I did my best to avoid eye contact and focus on prying away the fatty chicken skin from the meat while savoring my sweet platanos. I can see that I need to learn how to say "to go" in Spanish to avoid Zenophobic gringos clashing with the Dominicans in my neighborhood.

I was expecting to wait but was taken right away at 11am for a pedicure and fill. My nail tech was speedy and diligent with my toes and fill. She even managed to wrestle out my ingrown toenails with minimal pain. That is saying something right there. The only negative are the pedicure chairs and soaking bowls. They look cute but are really uncomfortable, the bowls don't adjust for taller patrons. Thankfully when soaking time was over, the nail tech let me Streach out my legs onto her lap and the knots in my calfs disappeared.

I got suckered into high expectations after reading their Yelp reviews but ended up literally getting sick after eating The Pig. Something didn't taste right going down and was even less enjoyable coming back up. Sorry but one bought with food poisoning is enough to keep me away.

If you are all about eating a healthy with adults this is the place for you. Despite it's Eastside location, there was nary a hipster in sight. The farm fresh food, some of which is grown in their own garden right next door makes me feel as if I should put in some raised vegetable beds myself.

I've had plenty of championship Mi Madres drive by breakfast tacos runs. Today was the first time, I actually stopped in to take a seat in the dining room.

Have you ever noticed how buttery their chips are? I felt like I was drinking an unfortunate pairing of California Chardonnay and salsa. An Alsace Riesling would have been a much wiser choice, its crisp acidity a counter balance to the salsas heat.

Just as I was reaching for an invisible glass of water our waitress disappeared...

   Umm,  could I have some water please. I'm parched. Oh and some menus too please?

Where do waitresses go when they disappear? Our gal is slacking. Still waiting.

   We'd like...

Ranchero for me: 2 eggs over hard topped with succulent ranchero sauce, just like Mexi-mama's carne guisada, potato, refried beans resting on a flour tortilla.

New Mexico for McCarty: 2 eggs topped with hot like fire green chile sauce, savory pork adobado, potato, refried beans and two flour tortillas.

I savored each and every perfect bite while McCarty inhaled his like a ravenous beast.

   Hey McCarty, can I taste your green chile before its gone please?

Oh yeah, just then a sense of food coma deliciousness erased all service issue annoyances. I'll be back,  despite the shoddy service. Anyone can have a bad day.

An auspicious beginning... The Gorgonzola gnocchi was melt in your mouth mac-n-cheese good.  I enjoyed the tender, flake off onto your fork braised pork shoulder but the Israeli couscous was slightly burnt as if scraped from the bottom of the pot.
Cafe Malta really could benefit from a more diversified wine list to elevate their food with distinctive pairings. All things considered, if I find myself in South Austin, I would come back to try their seasonal fare another time.

The first thing that caught my eye about Hill County Perogi was the very Boston Red Sox looking signage. Thankfully for this Austin Yankee, the recent rains have faded the sign a bit, if not my enthusiasm for a taste for their home cooking. My Grandmother was Polish-American, so for me, growing up with Perogi and Kalbasa is as American as Baseball and Apple Pie.

Hill Country Perogi updates traditional savory dumpling ingredients such as potato, cheese, cabbage and beets with a Tex-Mex flair throwing in, Bacon, Chorizo and Gorgonzola among other things.  The specials change weekly and sell out fast, so check their Twitter feed to find out what is new before its all gone.

The owners always have a smile for returning customers, reminding me of Grandmas warm kitchen, which keeps me coming back for more.

I want to love this place, really I do but, sadly I know what real West African food is supposed to taste like and well this the gringo version at best.
I love the garden and the owner is super nice, hence the extra star but the food, eh.

This is probably the best wine shop in Austin. The staff is very knowledgeable and willing to help you find the perfect wine, even if that means ordering it special for you.
Their weekly Saturday tastings are a standing appointment on my calendar. Each week, I get to taste something special, often with the winemaker present. There are plenty of other tastings in town but this is by far the best for the quality of wines they sample.