Rafael H.'s Profile

A friend insisted on Rudy's for brunch on Sunday.  I'm not too keen on driving a great distance to get breakfast or lunch but I decided to indulge her and head to e'ville anyway.  In the end, I wish I hadn't as while the food wasn't terrible, there wasn't anything that warranted a special trip for brunch.

Rudy's is clearly very popular.  You've got to wait a while for a table and they do pack them in inside.  The service was ok, the coffee came in big cups and the decor is probably the best thing about the place.  While as predictable as any franchise restaurant that loves its flair, there is a tasteful amount of playful toys and retro-childhood memorabilia frozen in amber (I get it, that's pretty clever) on the tabletops.  As well, there are enough stylized American diner cues to have you understand that the place is essentially a diner with a "twist".

So, what's the twist?  Well, besides the decor (which, though predictable is impressively tight) the food is not your average diner fare.  Yes, there are burgers and such, but the careful attention to detail elevates it above diner and dive status (which is unfortunate because I love that).  My dining companion had some Hollondaise-type dish that looked really good, served on a big, fat piece of cristy bread.  She seemed to enjoy it and it was certainly presented quite perfectly.  I had a breakfast burrito with a side of black beans that was good-n-turrible.  The burrito was perfectly rolled up and the the beans and pico were perfectly portioned on the dish.  The taste was OK, but really lacking in meat.

I've focused on the aesthetics of the food and overall decor because that's the best thing about Rudy's.  What would be great, in my eyes, is if the visual fest at Rudy's was paired with an actual feast of sloppy, more dive-inspired food that was still rich in flavors and inventive in creation.  What is served at Rudy's certainly doesn't suck but it is just overwhelmed by the attention to detail and design that creates an expectation for something truly special and just fails in the long run.

Had a three-meat combo of beef ribs, pork ribs and brisket.  It was quite good, smothered in a sauce that was equally tangy and sweet.  I would have preferred it dry with sauce on the side (the BBQ is just drowned in sauce) but that is a minor complaint.  As well, I would have liked an option to have a spicy sauce but, alas, there was only one kind of sauce.  While polite, the server definitely could care less about me or my dining companion and was quite annoyed when I didn't immediately answer her question about sides (why are there two different sets of options) or bread.  Clearly she didn't realize that her soft speaking mixed with an accent and the TV just blasting behind me summed to an experience that was akin to the teacher in Charlie Brown asking me what I wanted with my BBQ.  Best part of the night was chatting with my dining partner and then the lights being shut off unexpectedly.  That was their way of telling us it was closing time.

Price was OK and comparable to other rib joints in the area.  I don't think this place warrants a special trip from outside Fremont to experience.  I'd prefer give it 3.5 starts.  Would easily be 4 or higher if the service was better and the sides weren't awesomely mediocre.

Today was warm, by SF standards, and the line was certainly long for Bi-Rite.  But, the ice cream is well worth the rate.  I had the honey lavender and salted caramel.  The ice cream wasn't overly hard, but creamy with some firmness.  They have some really interesting sundaes including one that has olive oil as a topping (I'll try it next time).  Everyone else's reviews seem to echo mine: go here for ice cream; you won't be disappointed.

There is a shopping cart outside with hickory logs in it.  You had me at hello!

This place is a nice find.  The food is better than average and the ambiance is hole-in-the-wall authentic.  I went at 3pm on a Sunday and this place really was bumping.  People were continually coming in for take out (the dine in area is small - a counter with 6-8 chairs, and 4-5 tables).  I can see how some reviewers were put off by the service.  When you walk in, it isn't clear where the menu is (left wall) or what the order protocol is (the main lady will tell you to have a seat to wait to TAKE your order - it is strange).  But, I think that adds to the hole-in-the-wall appeal.  I ordered the rib dinner and was a bit worried about the portion size based on what I read up here before.  I got a good view of the smoker (it was open way too often - the meat was on the dry side) while I waited for my meal and eventually a diet soda was plopped down in front of me with a plate of pork ribs smothered in hot sauce (and the sauce is good,  spicy and sweet), three slices of wheat bread (wheat? I'm used to white bread as the standard), and an ice cream scoop dollop of potato salad.  The potato salad was lacking but I didn't come for the sides.  I came for the ribs.  A few other things I learned while eating my meal:

- No substitutions.  Some lady wanted beans instead of potato salad and the main lady in charge said "no substitutions, we charge separately for sides."  To me, that's just a bit strange.
- They run out of food because apparently they don't do a lot of prep.  The last three slices of cornbread were taken while I was eating.  The lady in charge said to a co-worker (or her underling) "that's it, no more cornbread for the day."
- If you eat in (the place is small with a Pac Man game in the back) you'll have to be assertive to ask for your check.
- The place isn't unkempt, but it definitely isn't held to a high standard of cleanliness either.
- If you sit at the counter, be prepared for the possibility of people standing and talking right over you to get their order taken.

Will go back and try cornbread, peach cobbler, and beef items.  This place has 5 star potential.

Pupusas are good and cheap.  The server was polite but when asked what she liked on the Nicaraguan side of the menu, a look of disgust overcame her and she said nothing.  This was quite funny.  Additionally, when I went to eat there, half of the menu was unavailable and that was a bummer (there was no explanation why).  But, overall, the food was good and I'll go back to see if I get better results.

Initial impressions: Went with a colleague for lunch.  Saw the "seat yourself" sign and did.  we were brought menus and then waited 15 minutes.  Finally, I went up to the cashier and he annoyingly told me "this is self service."  Ok, so why didn't the server, er, menu bringerer tell me that.  Additionally, my concept of self service is buffet, not grab your own plate, utensils, and drink, go sit down, and then we'll bring the food to you.

The food:  we ordered a chicken curry (I forget what it was specifically) and a lamb curry (achar gosht).  They were tasty enough but I'll be damned if they didn't just take a cleaver mercilessly to the meat, leaving bone shards and fragments in the curry!  I don't know if this is 'authentic' or not (and I really don't care) but please, PLEASE, warn your customers about that or be prepared to do the Heimlich often.  It's really too bad because the taste of the curry was enough for me to proceed with my meal and just be really cautious about eating and have a napkin nearby to spit out the bone shards.

Payment: I'm a firm believer that in 2009, if a restaurant takes cash only there better be a huge sign that announces this at the door.  And, the sign should say "CASH ONLY" not "no bankcards or ATM" or whatever else.  Also, I'm a bit more tolerant of mom and pops, or older, established eateries (like Val's) being cash only - it's a part of their charm as it reminds you of a different time.  With Pakwan, that just isn't the case.  This is a contemporary restaurant with a good sized parking lot, nicely decorated interior that is new, and servers - er, make that, menu bringerers (at least in my case).  Get the damn merchant account and be done with it already!

Upon leaving, I couldn't use the door I entered in (it was locked).  So the guy behind the counter is yelling at me and my colleague to "use the other door."  Which one?  The one marked "private?"  The one going to the bathroom?  the one to the kitchen?  Oh I see, the one that isn't clearly labeled "EXIT."  What?  You can't exhibit customer service and just unlock the main entrance for me?  That's my recollection of how businesses run it when they have customers who leave after closing.

Going out of business?  When?  In 2015?

I first went to Oak Warehouse in summer 2007 when I saw they were "going our of business" and had a huge sale.  Looking for a bed frame, I went inside with my wife, hoping so snag a huge deal and walk out with a nice, not-held-together-with-crazy-hardware bed frame.  Well, I was sorely disappointed.  I found a bed frame I liked, and the hawk of a salesman swooped in with his calculator and offered it to me for a whopping 15% off the tag.  I was insulted. I took a look at all the inventory they had and thought "if they are going out of business, surely they want to liquidate this stuff, right?"  I was wrong.

Fast forward to last month (August 2008).  A year later, the Oak Warehouse is still 'going out of business.'  When I walked in a second time, a year later, I saw just as much inventory with crazy, sky-high prices.  This time, I got this Amazon of a bitch as a saleswoman who wouldn't stop following me around the store!!  I asked the Amazon when the store was going to finally close.  She looked to the top left of the room, searching for a good answer to make up, and said "probably in September or October."  After I saw her answer the question, it was clear the 'going out of business' bit was a sham and I left.

Stay away from this place.  It is clear that they aren't going out of business anytime soon and they will prosper so long as they have you believing they will be going out of business.

CASH ONLY - CASH ONLY - CASH ONLY

It is hard to believe that in this day and age of 1s and 0s flying down copper and other wires, there are still eateries that don't accept credit cards.  At Zac's, it becomes obvious immediately that the joint is cash only: there is no Visa, MC, Amex logo in sight, and the cash register looks as if it were freshly purchased from the five-and-dime and brought back to the future by Marty McFly.  One does not judge the worth of an establishment by its preferred choice of tender alone, however.

The breakfast at Zac's is good, served in portions just right, with prices that aren't over the top.  Especially notably are the hashbrowns and sausage gravy dishes (I tend to prefer Doug's Place in Castro Valley for sausage gravy dishes but this place is ok).  The coffee leaves a lot to be desired but this is a minor complaint.  My wife had the french toast and she said it was above average.  Mom-in-law had an omelet that looked REALLY good and invoked food-envy within me.  The service is average but our server was quite friendly and the atmosphere of the place is such that you really don't mind if the server isn't on hand and knee waiting on you.

This place just barely gets 4 stars because the price is good.  I'd say my review is more 3.5-3.75 stars.  Oh, and don't believe that stuff about credit cards being accepted:  CASH ONLY!!

I'd like to think that the Elephant Bar is the result of a graduate level Advanced Restauranteur Algorithm programming course at Stanford.  I imagine that the instructor sat his students down and gave them the following for a final project:

"Students, you are to code an algorithm that will determine a successful restaurant based on the following critera:

- The restaurant, in all facets, must exude 'hip', 'cool', and 'contemporary' in the way that the consumer will expect after watching America's Top Chef and Hell's Kitchen...
- The menu must be filled with intriguing dishes subverted by simple, new-American-rustic offerings like - hamburgers and fries...
- The cost for all food must be automatically gauged so that the clientele can be fooled into believing that the high price of their meal is directly related to a quality, but 'affordable' fine dining experience

"Now - go and code your hearts out!  Bring me...franchisable success!!!"

And so, these grad students study other, similar chain restaurants like The Cheesecake Factory, P.F. Chang's, and the Macaroni Grill.  They code away for hours, thinking about how they can take the predictable elements of upper-middle class from each and streamline each conditional statement until they can get the following:

function defineRipOffDining($food, $decor, $service){
if($food == "expensive" && $decor == "flashy" && $service == 'marginal"){
$our.bottom_line = "fat";
$customer.experience = $mediocre_experience;
}
return $mediocre_experience;
}

And the result is: Elephant Bar

Why do I go to such lengths to write such an obtuse review?  Because this restaurant, through it's overpriced food to it's pretentious demeanor (who the fuck serves soup samples in a shot glass?!) went to great lengths to tell me that I was going to be ripped off because I was lucky to just get a table to experience the Experience.

My hamburger - a step above a Whopper
My wife's chicken marsala  - it looked like beef stroganoff and she only ate half of it (she normally finishes her meal)
My fries - apparently they think I have to cut down on the fries because I was served the same portion size as my 4-year old's kid's hamburger entree.

The highlights: dessert was great.  The frozen, non-alcoholic drinks were good too.  However, none of this was made easier by the fact that our server was forced by his boss, who was probably forced by someone else, to immediately offer us samples of the asparagus soup IN A SHOT GLASS when we were seated.  Worse yet, he kept the damn thing on our table the whole evening while bussing all other drinkware and tableware.

This review would have been one star but earned an extra for the giant, elephant-sized balls this restaurant has for over charging the upper middle-class for offerings like a 'salad' that is literally a head of lettuce, cut in half, drizzled with out-of-the-bottle Thousand Island dressing with pico de gallo and charging $4.50 for it.

If as much attention was put into the food as was put into the decor and overall design of the restaurant, this place would be a fantastic place to eat.  But, unfortunately eating at Casa Orozco is like going on a date with the hottest, but most vapid person: lots to look at but nothing to satisfy your craving for substance.

I had the super burrito (they call it something else - I forget what).  This is an item that, to me, should be a well-defined dish at any CalMex restaurant.  It needn't be too fancy or too plain.  It should have a balance of rice, beans, meat, and assorted extras (pico, guac, etc.) that elevate it to the status of an excellent, homemade hamburger at a diner if executed right.  Thing is, my burrito was quite good'n'turrible and I really felt ripped off by price of it (pushing $10).  The taste was quite bland and the chile colorado filling was intriguingly dark but lacking another dimension of flavor to make it worthwhile.  On the plus side, it definitely wasn't too salty (as is the case with a lot of CalMex I eat).  But, I was looking for something extra to tease the tastebuds more in the flavor of the meat and just didn't get it.

Another thing that annoyed me was reading that their arroz con pollo was made with boneless chicken.  Being Puerto Rican and having grown up on this dish, I found it strange that it was on the menu (this isn't really a fusion restaurant) and was mildly offended by the fact that it says it is made with skinless, boneless chicken.  In my opinion, it isn't Arroz con Pollo if the chicken isn't at least parts of a whole chicken, skin and all.  What they serve at Casa Orozco sounds more like Arroz con Nuggets.

I will never eat here again.  It gets two stars because the outside seating was actually quite pleasant and the service was nice.