passive aggressive reviews / angry people on yelp

8/15/2006

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8/15/2006 laura "champagne tastes, beer budget" a. says:

rob, that's fucking hilarious. thanks for the link. next time i'll have to take a picture :)

yeah, i just thought we were kinda all over the whole flaming thing once we reached our 20s, that's what i love about yelp - that it's so posi they don't even really let you flame other people besides angry messages/talk threads or your own angry posts - but i guess you can't escape it on any site!

8/15/2006 laura "champagne tastes, beer budget" a. says:

love(d) about yelp? ahh!

8/15/2006

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8/16/2006 Emily "Ms." M. says:

What interests me about the 2 reviews specifically commenting on your review is that they both became Yelpers in August 2006 AND they only have 3 reviews beween the 2 of them.
Strange...makes me think they're working for someone...
possibly (gasp, dare I say it?!?!) Sympathy for the Kettle?!?!?!?

8/16/2006 laura "champagne tastes, beer budget" a. says:

yeah, i emailed the jason guy and he told me that he only signed up for his account to review the place. but what pisses me off is that it's not like he reviewed the place and spent the whole review talking about how great it was..he spent 3/4 of the review dissing me specifically.

i'm not normally so thin skinned but it was just really surprising to me that people would be that bitchy! i'm pissed off that i was just trying to be honest so people would know what was up and people had to flip out at me.

8/16/2006

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8/16/2006 Jennifer B. says:

Seriously, who picks yelp as the place for a flame war? I can sympathize... last night I received the following "compliment" from a mysterious Bill C., who has no reviews, no friends, no profile, and appears to have joined only to make fun of me:

"Wow, Boston is lucky to have you.  Of all the cities in this country I can't believe we get to enjoy all of your condescending, self-aggrandizing reviews (try not to compare everything in Boston to the other more magical cities you've lived in.)  Although all of your reviews are basically worthless, your take on Pizzeria Uno was especially obnoxious though.  If it's not too much trouble I'd love to get your five cents worth on my favorite local restaurant, the Applebee's on Huntington Ave.  Keep writing!!!"

Um, inappropriate? Unnecessary? Tasteless? Not only that, but I'd judge from both the rest of the Yelp community's response to my reviews and the fact that Yelp covers multiple cities where I can write reviews that it's perfectly acceptable to compare food in an absolute, national sense rather than just in the Boston area.

Sheesh.

8/16/2006 Dan P. says:

I gave a bad review of a realty office in Brighton because they were horrible consistently. I descibed everything that happend as it actually happened, but at the end made some random comments about the realtors there being metrosexuals. The owner of the business messaged me on yelp saying he took issue with my review, insisting that no one who works there slicks their hair back.

At first I felt a little bad, but then I realized that if of all the things I mentioned specifically the only thing the OWNER of the business could take issue with was my description of the appearance of the agents, then that means I was right and he knows it.

I feel that this is a place for consumers to share thoughts on businesses and services, am I wrong? I thought about taking the review down but screw that. I posted exactly what I would tell anyone who asked about my experience, as is the intent of this site. It's not supposed to be free advertising for businesses, it is for the consumers.

8/16/2006 Jennifer B. says:

Dan, I agree. The only caveat is that as reviewers, we should be extremely mindful of the fact that a wider audience sees the reviews, and we must therefore be as responsible as any "professional" reviewer in a newspaper. I don't at all mean to imply that you were not (you undoubtedly were), but I do want to make the point that a bad review (especially a specific incident) must be defensible.

Just keep in mind that these reviews can make or break a small business and therefore people's livelihoods, especially as yelp grows.

8/16/2006 laura "champagne tastes, beer budget" a. says:

Jennifer: clearly this bill guy didn't know what he was talking about (which you already know) - i specifically trust your reviews on places because you've lived other places, and i like that you know your southern food! it annoys me that we invest so much time and energy in reviewing places and people can come on here and just be nasty. although i think it says something that the people being nasty are not the ones who regularly review. i can't believe someone purposefully signed up for an account without any reviews JUST to be nasty to you. what the hell?

and dan, i COMPLETELY agree. if we all said that we loved everything that would be the point of this site?

also, i'm really surprised by the approaches of the business owners (both yours and the one i mentioned)... if i was a business owner, i would say, "i am SO sorry that that happened to you. is there anything i can do to make it up to you and get your business back?" - i would definitely add that to my post to show people that the owner cared even if there's nothing she can do now about what happened to me!

8/16/2006 Jennifer S. says:

I just wanted to add a comment in here about owners.  Laura A., you mentioned that business owners could use Yelp as a positive, and I want to let you know that that has happened to me.  I reviewed Boloco (formerly The Wrap) and soon after I received a message from the owner John Pepper thanking me for my review and my honesty.  I know that he has contacted others as well.  It's nice to know that some people out there do appreciate Yelp for what it is.  I wish you had had a similar experience instead of being attacked and accused of being a liar.  Keep Yelping and stay truthful.

8/16/2006 Michelle D. says:

Hi Laura, so sorry to hear about the hassle.  

It's interesting that this stuff happens.  If the owners and managers spent half as much time fixing the problems than what they spend lashing out at the whistleblowers, there wouldn't any more problems.  It's really simple.

It's completely unprofessional to do this.   The owners should have apologized, offered to refund your money and sent you a gift certificate for the store.  

(Call the Better Business Bureau and the Health Dept if you really want to put an end to it).

8/16/2006 Sean L. says:

If anyone ever feels insulted or offended by another yelper's review, I encourage them to flag the offending.  Yelp is a place for people to agree or disagree in a grown up manner.  This is obviously not an example of grown up behavior.

My apologies Laura that you had to deal with this, but take comfort in the fact that you are a respected and established Elite Yelper while the person insulting you is not.  (AKA, you rule and Jason B. clearly has a stick up his ass... and yes, his account is suspicious and I wouldn't be surprised if he was associated with the business in some way.)

We are likely going to see more attempts at this kind of thing as Yelp's popularity grows.  We are the originals, however, and as long as we stay on top of this sort of activity by flagging the inappropriate, we can keep Yelp a positive, happy, and growing community.

Thanks for bringing this event to everyones attention in the Talk Boards.  Knowledge is power... fight the jerks!

8/16/2006 Brendan M. says:

The same thing happened to me as to Jennifer S. Hopefully most business owners (if they even know about Yelp) understand that it's a valuable way to get feedback from their clients, and try to apologise for problems rather than insult you.

At the same time, I have to admit that sometimes it's easy to slam a place based on a single bad experience which may not even be the establishment's fault (as opposed to another patron or even you having a bad day). That said, a bug floating around in your drink definitely deserves a write-up and a big thumb down.

8/16/2006 Emily R. says:

And while we're at it - is that review listed on the Boston site, NYC or is Yelp all one big world? I ask because I'm (now) a Bostonian and have always been vicariously protective of our fair city. Boo New York - boo! So when he writes go back to Boston, I say to Laura A. "Come on home, darlin'. Leave those filthy ubercool city folk behind."

8/16/2006

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8/16/2006 Walt "hasn't been on Yelp much lately" Z. says:

go back to boston? and people wonder why i hate new york so much.

8/17/2006 Amy B. says:

People who lash out don't belong on Yelp. All bashers should be directed to Rants and Raves on Craigslist. That's where all the negative people post their views and bash others that think differently.

8/17/2006 Derek S. says:

my advice...if you ever get these feelings from or toward any person or review...go spend some time in my muppet conversation...you'd be surprised at how good it makes you feel!

8/18/2006

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8/20/2006 laura "champagne tastes, beer budget" a. says:

I've flagged the guy's review four times, nothing's happened. i have to say, i feel really tempted to peace out on yelp. this whole thing has really left a bad taste in my mouth about this site. i feel like the site in general needs a lot more moderation, not only for harassing behavior from other people, but also just simple stuff like updating business listings to reflect when businesses are closed. i definitely agree in free speech and differing opinions (i.e. eating at border cafe is my idea of torture and it's someone else's idea of a good time), but people being assholes for no reason shouldn't be allowed to basically troll the site. the site is pretty big, but when people click "flag as inappropriate/flag for review" it should actually be reviewed, in my opinion - i'm helping out by flagging it for moderators since clearly they can't look at everything.

8/20/2006 Jill "Jilka" O. says:

Emily M. (and others) --
I fully agree that those bashing you, laura a., are most likely workers or good friends of "Jodi and her sweet staff" (http://www.yelp.com/us...)

I used to work at an independently-owned coffee shop and the owner was a young, hip, well-liked woman who worked her ass off to keep the shop running well and up to date on the latest trends in espresso in Italy, as well as teas and complimentary foods. So in some sense I could understand how someone working for a person like that or just a "regular customer" and friend would be defensive to your review, laura a. But, with that said, it is what it is. A roach was floating in your latte (although with all that foam, it sounded more like a cappuccino) and that should rightfully be commented on in your review.

As for josh's reference to the Wendy's finger incident, I believe that incident is culprit for people's readiness to shoot the gun and call someone a liar, because let's face it: a roach in a drink is UNBELIEVABLY HORRIFIC and hard to imagine it could actually happen.

8/20/2006 Jill "Jilka" O. says:

Oh, and don't let that get you down. Your reviews are terrfic and I think many people would miss reading them.

8/20/2006 Jill "Jilka" O. says:

(P.S. New Yorkers, didn't Bostonians come to your aid immediately during 9/11? What's up with all this rivalry and hating. America is supposed to be ONE UNITED NATION. Quit the bickering, both of you!)

8/24/2006 Allix "granny sunglasses" T. says:

Hey Laura,

don't peace out on yelp--your reviews are awesome.  I appreciate your complete honesty and sharp wit--so do most other yelpers I think.  

As for the tool who flamed you over a review, that is not and shouldn't be the case for any business owner.  I used to run a small coffee shop in my hometown and was really proud of the work I did there.  No matter how great you are with your store though, shit happens, and you have to own up to it.  Even though I was a clean freak, I had a similar incident happen where a customer got an unpleasant surprise with their breakfast.  Instead of being an unprofessional ass about it, I gave the guy free breakfast and coffee for a week and refunded his money.  I seriously cannot fathom why the people at this place wouldn't have tried to do something similar for you.

Finally, I'm a native New Yorker, so I hope I can redeem some of my jackass brethren down south..

8/24/2006 Matt W. says:

Maybe we can add a "Boot to the Head" compliment.

8/24/2006 Derek S. says:

Other than this incident...I enjoy the very friendly Yelp atmosphere. Thanks ladies and gents.

8/25/2006 Elaine C. says:

I hope that doesn't happen to me.  I'm very thin skinned.  It doesn't take much to make me head for the hills, usually.  In this case, you stand your ground.  Keep yelping, please!  I admire your reviews, your wit, and your strength to stay and not let them get you down.  Look at all of these positive people who have taken the time to say nice things to you and then discount the ugly comments from the moronic minority.

8/25/2006

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8/26/2006 Pete S. says:

I look at the internet as a reflection of the real world -- mostly anarchic, mostly self-regulating, that's always going to be populated by a sizable number of assholes in addition to the good people. Like New York, let's say, since New York keeps coming up. Its wild-west quality's what makes the internet great as well as occasionally frustrating, though. So thick skins are in order -- after all, if some asshole's giving you shit, well, that's just some asshole, and what's his/her opinion really worth to you? Don't validate it by giving them undue attention.

One of the longstanding incontrovertible laws of internet communities is "Don't feed the trolls." You can't win a fight with someone whose goal is to keep you pissed off perpetually -- that's a war of attrition not worth your energies. The time-tested effective response is ignore them, delete them when possible, and don't take the bait.

8/28/2006 Dachary "Raspberry" C. says:

I don't want to resurrect the bad feelings of being flamed by a jerk, but I did feel the need to reply to this topic. I, personally, have received comments from people about my reviews... but only in a positive sense. Although, to be fair, it totally freaked me out when an employee at a place I reviewed asked me about my review when I went into the store. It's one thing to have people send you messages via Yelp about your reviews, but it's another thing entirely when people out in the real world comment about things you post on the internet. Especially when those people out in the real world are complete strangers.

I think the thing I'm trying to communicate is that Yelp asks for (and many people provide) a great deal of personal information. It's great to post names and pics so you can become a part of the community, but it's easy to lose sight of the fact that doing so removes our anonymity. I tend to think of things that I post on the internet as being removed from reality... I post in many places anonymously, and don't make a distinction between Yelp (where I'm not anonymous) and the places where I am. This hasn't yet been a problem for me, except that I got weirded out by the stranger in the store asking me about my Yelp review, but I do know Yelpers who have been personally, professionally, and adversely effected by reviews they've posted on Yelp. With Yelp, Myspace, and any other internet venue that removes anonymity, it's important to keep sight of that fact... that complete strangers, people who you've never met, and in many cases, people who you don't even know exist, are viewing your information every day. And your boss could be reading what you post, too. So my caveat would be - don't say anything on Yelp that you wouldn't say in your place of business, or anything that you don't want to discuss in detail with Joe Schmo on the street.

Freedom of speech is a great idea, and it's comforting and fun to belong to a community where you can share your ideas, but keep in mind that the community doesn't belong only to your friends. In today's connected world, the information you post is at the fingertips of millions... and even if they don't have anything to say about it, people *are* reading it.

Very Big Brother, isn't it? But it's also true. I, at least, find that kind of scary... and it's definitely something I try to keep in the back of my mind.

8/30/2006 Jeannette S. says:

Laura, at least they didn't threaten to sue you!  In SF, several yelpers have gotten threats by business owners accusing them of slander and that their review will cause them to lose customers.  I don't think they have a case.  Someone on the SF boards stated (and I totally agree, which is why I'm reiterating it here), these reviews should help businessowners realize what they need to improve on, and not take it personally...  

Brittany, I suggest that you ask your other customers to review their good experiences on here.  I don't think there's anything wrong with that.  I think that people will tend to review their bad experiences more than their good ones, and will go out of their way to do so.  So that's probably why that so-called yelper only has one review.

It's a mad world out there...