Do you have any rules regarding sex with yourself?

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01/19/2008 karen "quit laughing so loud" k. says:

:H:ahahahaha

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01/19/2008 melonbar .. says:

So we know that Karen likes to laugh at herself.

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01/19/2008 karen "quit laughing so loud" k. says:

Laughing cause only melonbar would come up with this one....

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01/19/2008 Joe "crazyjoe" N. says:

It's a beginning of a life-long relationship...

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01/19/2008 Jason "leader of evil penguins" G. says:

One rule!

If it comes out red, call 911.

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01/20/2008 doug "Murderface" c. says:

no anal

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01/20/2008 Jay "Bacon wrap me" F. says:

Yes, I never say no to myself, even if I'm not in the mood.

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01/20/2008 ChRiS "JeDi" C. says:

cuddling right after and talk about our feelings

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01/20/2008 The ghost of megan "It's just a website, not real life so get over it" G. says:

It's sex with someone I love.

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01/20/2008 Dave "Fearsome" A. says:

I have to still respect me in the morning AND make eggs.

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has violated the Yelp Terms of Service and is no longer a registered yelper.

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01/20/2008 Jason "leader of evil penguins" G. says:

OH! just remembered one.

Don't stick it in the pencil sharpener.

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01/20/2008 Christine L. says:

if they smell bad, it's questionable to proceed.

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01/20/2008 Jason "leader of evil penguins" G. says:

If it's questionable to proceed, you do it in the shower. =P

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01/20/2008 Christine L. says:

what if their shower isn't stocked?
hence, the smelling of badness.

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01/20/2008 Jason "leader of evil penguins" G. says:

I would say ask the neighbors, but that would negate the purpose. hmmmm.... Get your self drunk, then take advantage of your self? You know, the beer goggles factor.

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01/20/2008 Dan "DJ Rotten HD" H. says:

No photos, please.

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01/20/2008 Jason "leader of evil penguins" G. says:

***not to hijack the thread, but have you ever walked up to a celebrity and said: "dOOd!!, i used to jack off to you all the time!!"**

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01/20/2008 Dave "Fearsome" A. says:

Whatever you do, don't call out the wrong name.

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01/20/2008 karen "quit laughing so loud" k. says:

there's never a scheduling conflict.

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01/20/2008 Joe "crazyjoe" N. says:

And no jealousy issue, even for the jealous type...

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01/20/2008 karen "quit laughing so loud" k. says:

it's 1:30 am, goodnight all.

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01/20/2008 karen "quit laughing so loud" k. says:

Night Joe.

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01/20/2008 Dave "Fearsome" A. says:

One problem is that you can't fake it.

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01/20/2008 Gail H. says:

I'm sleepy. Nite to all of you.

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01/20/2008 Joe "crazyjoe" N. says:

Good Night...

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01/20/2008 Jason "leader of evil penguins" G. says:

ok, that just leaves me, joe and dave,.... uhm... i'm outta here...

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01/20/2008 Jeff "Welcome to the Madness" M. says:

I limit it to only 3 times a day and never use the handcuffs unless I can still get to the phone ; )

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has closed their Yelp account and is no longer a registered yelper.

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has violated the Yelp Terms of Service and is no longer a registered yelper.

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01/20/2008 Lissa -. says:

the one time when you can be selfish and finish up in 2 minutes and go to sleep

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Cidne "The ALPHA BITCH queen" W. says:

Naturally ribbed for pleasure, wash hands (and especially fingertips) before proceeding with the day.

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01/20/2008 Jim Bob "a free martian" H. says:

Never let the dog watch.

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01/20/2008 Shawnee "I own the eggstractor" H. says:

Wait. I went to a seminar on this last weekend.

http://www.jamyewaxman...

Looking forward to her next seminar "Sex Boot Camp: Sword Swallowing 101"

You should the parting (no pun intended) gifts we got.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Rick R. says:

The only rule is no cuddling afterwards. It's not that kind of relationship.

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01/20/2008 Shauna "Vodka is still my #1 lover" D. says:

I compliment the special underwear bought for the occasion for at least 5 minutes.

Oh, and every woman should be able to dingle their own berry.

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01/20/2008 Jason "leader of evil penguins" G. says:

I have a rule for women....

You must video tape for us pervs to watch!

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01/20/2008 Dave "Fearsome" A. says:

I always have to convince myself that I'm not gay. Usually I throw in a line about transcendence. It's getting a little old.

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has violated the Yelp Terms of Service and is no longer a registered yelper.

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01/20/2008 Puka Dog "pupcakes" D. says:

I don't have any thumbs : (

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01/20/2008 Koom "Brofessor" D. says:

HAHA dude diet coke never quite tastes like the "real thing"

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has violated the Yelp Terms of Service and is no longer a registered yelper.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Frank K. says:

i refuse to wear protection. i'm wild like that

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01/20/2008 karen "quit laughing so loud" k. says:

If I'm good I ask myself out on a 2nd date.

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01/20/2008 Puka Dog "pupcakes" D. says:

it's overrated. the grass is always greener...

But I do keep cupcakes at my bedside for such occasions

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01/20/2008 Michael A. says:

so how much foreplay is appropriate?

shouldn't this be categorized under "Relationships & Dating"???

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01/20/2008 Greg "Secret Assistant (to the) Regional Manager" Y. says:

The humor category is probably appropriate for most of us.

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has violated the Yelp Terms of Service and is no longer a registered yelper.

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01/20/2008 reg "ina dentata" t. says:

...besides nutella?

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01/20/2008 melonbar .. says:

Ankur wanted me to say something in here. So here it is:

1st RULE: You do not talk about FLICK CLUB.

2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about FLICK CLUB.

3rd RULE: If you say "stop", or go limp, taps out, the flick is over.

4th RULE: Two hands to a flick.

5th RULE: One flick at a time.

6th RULE: No shirts, no shoes.

7th RULE: Flicks will go on as long as they have to.

8th RULE: If this is your first night at FLICK CLUB, you HAVE to flick.

I'm out.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Frank K. says:

ok

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01/20/2008 Koom "Brofessor" D. says:

what the heck are flicks? is there a club i need membership to?

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01/20/2008 Puka Dog "pupcakes" D. says:

net-flicks?

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01/20/2008 Greg "Secret Assistant (to the) Regional Manager" Y. says:

Flickin' the bean.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Rick R. says:

Flickin' the man in the boat

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01/20/2008 karen "quit laughing so loud" k. says:

the payment is really good, 20 dollars

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01/20/2008 Marvin "Dj DueL" S. says:

when youre done with the deed. a;ways call the person you were thinkin' about and confess what you were thinkin'. hahahahaha

ps what the flick are yall talkin' about?

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01/20/2008 karen "quit laughing so loud" k. says:

Duel, ......they'll either be angry or disappointed.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Dave "Fearsome" A. says:

Once Larry David's manager on the show told Larry that he was using Larry's wife in his fantasies. When Larry got pissed, the guys excuse was that "he has a shallow bench".

Anyway Duel, it's not a bad idea to keep it to yourself LOL

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has violated the Yelp Terms of Service and is no longer a registered yelper.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Linda N. says:

I like to start the night off with some Menage a Trois.
http://www.bevmo.com/p...

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01/20/2008 Brian "Touch me I'm Sick" T. says:

not at work

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Linda N. says:

Some peanut butter would be useful too.

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has violated the Yelp Terms of Service and is no longer a registered yelper.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Linda N. says:

I can't help it, Masa. How could anyone say no to Menage a trois?

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01/20/2008 melonbar .. says:

Haha.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Frank K. says:

peanut butter? that could get messy

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has violated the Yelp Terms of Service and is no longer a registered yelper.

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01/20/2008 Linda N. says:

Chunky then creamy.

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01/20/2008 Kerry "Tempura Assassin" K. says:

Linda - that's a really yummy wine!

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Linda N. says:

I agree, Kerry!

01/20/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has violated the Yelp Terms of Service and is no longer a registered yelper.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Linda N. says:

Too much peanut better, Masa?

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01/20/2008 Leah "Creative Scientist" D. says:

it'll only happen if I have my favorite toy. if batteries are dead, it ain't happenin'.

Elite '08

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01/20/2008 Jeff "Welcome to the Madness" M. says:

Self bondage is real bad!!!!

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01/21/2008 Jim Bob "a free martian" H. says:

Linda... Don't knock it.... that is a really good wine. Difficult to find...but, easy to drink.

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Linda N. says:

I wasn't knocking Menage a Trois, Jim Bob. I said I agree.

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01/21/2008 Eric "Lebowski Urban Achiever" H. says:

Never ever at dusk!

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01/21/2008 Synthony "Short Stack" T. says:

First I gotta butter myself up for a little bit... get the mood goin..

But none of that "I can't believe it's not butter" crap..

Can't eff around when it comes to quality now!

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01/21/2008 Roman "Smells like a Russian" T. says:

Wow... I can't believe I just noticed this thread. lol
Everyone already used up all the jokes I was going to use. :(

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Dave "Fearsome" A. says:

Shortstack - You think I"M funny :D

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01/21/2008 Synthony "Short Stack" T. says:

I'm very easily amused :) haha

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01/21/2008 GG- "musics got me feeling so free, gonna celebrate" B. says:

when it comes to sex with the self, its a no holds barded match between fists a 'cuffed and the goodness within... ooooh good times.

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

yes ... dont mess up what a man can do better!

either that or desperate times call for desperate measures

to each his own

now ways better than the natural way

2 are better than 1

meh it depends on the day and mood im in! this is a funny thread

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

yes ... dont mess up what a man can do better!

either that or desperate times call for desperate measures

to each his own

now ways better than the natural way

2 are better than 1

meh it depends on the day and mood im in! this is a funny thread

Elite '08

93

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

yes ... dont mess up what a man can do better!

either that or desperate times call for desperate measures

to each his own

now ways better than the natural way

2 are better than 1

meh it depends on the day and mood im in! this is a funny thread

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

yes ... dont mess up what a man can do better!

either that or desperate times call for desperate measures

to each his own

now ways better than the natural way

2 are better than 1

meh it depends on the day and mood im in! this is a funny thread

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

darn stupid computer sorry about the posts

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

darn stupid computer sorry about the posts

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01/21/2008 GG- "musics got me feeling so free, gonna celebrate" B. says:

its okay Senna, you'd be surprised what a big ol' bootie will allow someone to get away with...

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Brian "The Original" C. says:

no eye contact

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Michael A. says:

so which hand do you smoke with when the deed is done?

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01/21/2008 GG- "musics got me feeling so free, gonna celebrate" B. says:

which ever hand wasnt the lady of the evening... i hate the taste of lube on my cigarette lol

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

a fat blunt! or black and milld

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

kidding... Jason what were you going to say?

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

just say it Jason!

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Cidne "The ALPHA BITCH queen" W. says:

One is a whole number. Not a Fraction.

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Michael A. says:

if smoking a blunt... what do you do when your supposed to puff, puff, pass? switch to the other hand?

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Senna "say it aint so" H. says:

yeah oc and if its really good stuff you might really see someone to pass it to

Jason!!!!

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Jeff "Welcome to the Madness" M. says:

Mirrors, whip cream and the keys to my bondage gear. Don't want the Fire Department to find me in compromising positions ; )

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Michael A. says:

Mad - if you are all tied up, how in the world do you finish? Houdini?

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Eric "Feel My Heat" W. says:

my one rule is that I always cum

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Jeff "Welcome to the Madness" M. says:

Good question. Let's just say it's very difficult and leave it at that. 0 )

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01/21/2008 Gail H. says:

I never cheat on myself.

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 ericka "absurdly luscious" L. says:

i have an open relationship with myself. i cheat on me anytime the opportunity arises.

Elite '08

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01/21/2008 Linden "Wonder Down Under" G. says:

I don't swallow.

Elite '08

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01/22/2008 Greg "Wish you were here!" A. says:

the left hand is not allowed to finish the job.

Elite '08

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01/22/2008 CJ "JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ" J. says:

do it like you mean it. hahaha

Elite '08

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01/22/2008 Cidne "The ALPHA BITCH queen" W. says:

"Some people get married, but I'll never cheat" Grace Jones

Elite '08

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02/12/2008 Ed "Gadfly" C. says:

i put on a keith sweat album and get out my oils

Elite '08

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02/12/2008 Jill "be extraordinary!" C. says:

i always make time for quickies...

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02/12/2008 melonbar .. says:

This thread is not nearly as funny without the original threads surrounding it. Oh wells.

Elite '08

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02/12/2008 Wes "Wes Yall" S. says:

Shhhhh Mangobar. This is my entertainment. I forgot all about tv. Wait, I still have a Wii and a Xbox 360... :P

Elite '08

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02/12/2008 Shawnee "I own the eggstractor" H. says:

I always break up with myself because the make-up sex is so good

Elite '08

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02/12/2008 Wes "Wes Yall" S. says:

Nice Shawnee!

02/12/2008

This post was removed because the yelper who wrote it has closed their Yelp account and is no longer a registered yelper.

Elite '08

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02/12/2008 Shawnee "I own the eggstractor" H. says:

When I'm done I usually review my TACO truck, but only if it doesn't move.

Elite '08

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02/12/2008 AJ "sassy" K. says:

u guys are sooo good to yourselves! *clapping*

Elite '08

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02/12/2008 stephen "the end is near" l. says:

roofies make it easier

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02/12/2008 The ghost of megan "It's just a website, not real life so get over it" G. says:

Stephen, that brought a tear to my eye. Awesome.

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02/12/2008 Greg "Secret Assistant (to the) Regional Manager" Y. says:

Never again on the bus.

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02/12/2008 GG- "musics got me feeling so free, gonna celebrate" B. says:

no rules, for the most part, but i wouldnt do it in front of children =p

Elite '08

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02/12/2008 Shawnee "I own the eggstractor" H. says:

Good Boy Triumph! Keep that lipstick well hidden.

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02/12/2008 Miki "will dance for cupcake" W. says:

speed always on high haha

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02/12/2008 GG- "musics got me feeling so free, gonna celebrate" B. says:

will do ms. shawnee!!! unless you wanna peak! lol

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02/12/2008 David P. says:

"Do you have any rules regarding sex with yourself?"

Even when I say "No!",

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