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Welcome to the Johnson's
- Nearest Transit:
-
Delancey St (F)
Essex St (J, M, Z)
2 Av (F)
- Outdoor Seating:
- No
- Accepts Credit Cards:
- No
- Parking:
- Street
- Good for Groups:
- Yes
- Price Range:
-
$
- Music:
- Juke Box
- Best Nights:
- Wed, Thu, Sun
- Happy Hour:
- Yes
- Alcohol:
- Full Bar
- Smoking:
- No
- Coat Check:
- No
- Noise Level:
- Average
- Good For Dancing:
- No
- Ambience:
- Dive-y
- Has TV:
- Yes
- Wheelchair Accessible:
- No
217 reviews for Welcome to the Johnson's
Review Highlights
"Offers pool table, cheap $2 PBR's, some cozy seats."
(in 48 reviews)
"Cheap drinks $2 PBRs and fun atmosphere."
(in 22 reviews)
"Oh yeah and I can't forget the kick ass jukebox."
(in 31 reviews)
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217 reviews in English
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Review from anthony r.
1/16/2012
This is where i get my pool hussle on.... and fwiw if anyone knows the name of the girl who i paired up with to win $10 bucks and met on the subway the next day on the way to the beach last year.. please tell let me know..
Thanks -
Review from Briana M.
11/25/2011
$2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr $2 pbr
and i'm in a seventies rec room decorated with the empty cans and a nice mix of friends, attractive and creepy guys. i wouldn't have it any other way. -
Review from Angel H.
Queens, NY
10/19/2011 1 Check-in Here
You want dive? This place is the ultimate dive. The only thing that keeping this place from being ultra-supremo dive is the old skid-row alcoholic men. (If you're interested, go to this one bar located at E. 14th street. You know you need help when you end up drinking at that place.)
Back in the early 2000s I used to come here quite a bit. It always looked like as if it was a crack den for early 80s Heavy Metal burnouts. Drinks were always cheap 'tho. Jukebox was decent. My favorite was the barely working tabletop Ms. Pacman machine.
The bathrooms were always gross, but not as bad as Mars bar (R.I.P.)
One time either late 1999, or early 2000. This young African-American male started circling around me. Walking back and forth, checking me out. I suspected that he was slightly off mentally. I was wrong. He was very mentally off.
He sat next to me and my ex on one of the many broken down couches this bar had. His opening conversation subject? "I heard white people get freaky when they have sex. Especially white women. They get real freaky, know what I mean?"
The hell?
Then he went into detail against our wishes, describing his encounter inside an elevator with a white women. About how 'freaky' the sex was.
We tried to end the conversation, but freaky-ass homeboy just kept on going. Then he asked how freaky our sex life was. My ex then put an immediate squash to the freakishness.
Freaky homeboy must've just got released from a mental institution. So I guess he wanted to celebrate and get freaky over at Welcome To The Johnson's.
Other than that, never really had any complaints. Most of the patrons were pretty laid-back and friendly. There was a pool table, semi-decent jukebox, and at one time, cheap Guinness on tap. Basically went to this place for the cheap Guinness. Good place to take pals for some cheap brews.
Then I didn't come back for a few years. Nothing major, just found other places to hang out.
Early last year, I was walking around the area, and remembered this place. Out of curiosity, decided to see how it was holding up.
Unfortunately, not too well. It looked worse than ever. Although the bartender was nice.
Worst part - no more cheap Guinness.
Now I love me some dive bars. Dive bars have character. This place however, lost its character a long time ago.
However, I wouldn't be surprised if I ended up coming here again. -
Review from Judy C.
1/24/2012
A good ole dive bar...you know you probably going to get cooties if you touch anything in the bathroom but who cares....drinks are cheap and people are cool...fun times!!!
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Review from Kat G.
San Francisco, CA
1/18/2012
Great bar, stumbled upon it one rainy night with a friend, really friendly staff, cheap beers, laid-back atmosphere. Perfect port in the storm. And yes it is a bit grimy but that's what comes with being in a classic dive bar
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Review from Victoria F.
New York, NY
10/11/2011
This was my second attempt to get into this bar. About a year ago, my three female friends and I tried to get in, but they denied us because they were "over capacity." I see now that we were spared.
Anyway, back to my actual review of the place:
So seriously, when the other reviewers said that you "feel dirty" the moment you walk in. That's no joke! I can't even explain to you-- but think BO + plastic + alcohol. Everything looks dirty and feels dirty.
The funny thing is that the bouncer stopped us and swiped our IDs and made us think that the bar was packed (since the windows are somewhat tinted). We walked in around 9pm on a Monday, and there were 4 people at the bar. Granted, by the time we left around 11pm, people were playing pool, the music had gone up in volume and the amount of people had multiplied to around 12.
I'm pretty sure we broke the dingy, ripped up, plastic covered couch we sat on last night. Oops. -
Review from Patrick C.
Brooklyn, NY
12/9/2011
As the Lower East Side continues it's descent into becoming the new Meatpacking District, it's comforting that their are still places in the neighborhood where one does not have to deal with prick bouncers, overpriced drinks, and cover charges.
The place is kitschy as hell (but in a good way), it's kinda like the owners raided the sets from freaks and geeks and set it up in the bar. PBR is cheap, the crowd is usually chill, and the music is usually punk. So it's got an old school touch to it. -
Review from Selena L.
Los Angeles, CA
8/19/2011
Ever have sex in a bar bathroom? Here, be sure to pick the larger of the two private toilets so you can really sprawl out with your drunken flailing.
Also, if during a booze-fueled Black Top Street Hockey league drink-a-thon, someone approaches you and asks, "Did you throw up in the bathroom sink?" be sure to ask what of what the puke consists. When the response is "BBQ chicken burrito," you can deny any such involvement because everyone knows you don't like BBQ, chicken or burritos. Then follow up with the clarification that you did, indeed, vomit, but it was outside of the Johnsons, and the contents were "just PBR and a Cliff bar."
You are pure class.Listed in: Dating in NYC: Don't Bother
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Review from Sarah B.
10/3/2011
A decent dive bar with cheap drinks and good tunes. It was a rainy and humid night and my friends and I weren't dressed up.
My friend said, "Well .. I know this place. It's grimey but the drinks are cheap."
Glad we ended up at Johnson's. We left when the wall started moving (ew, bugs). -
Review from Mike H.
Brookline, MA
9/19/2011
I was never really a fan of the LES only because it was home to a vast majority of the NYC dive bars, (not that there's anything wrong with dive bars.) I was a fan of the night clubs that got packed and the bars where people fight over bar space to get a drink. But a new light was turned on about the LES and it all started with Johnson's.
All I wanted to do was just sit, hang out, and enjoy the night. Low key. Totally achieved here. The jukebox was top notch, the wall of portrait pictures was hilarious, and the bathrooms were the typical bathrooms that you figured you'd end your night in: messy, colorful, hopefully you won't remember it, yet eclectic and cool all at the same time.
The $2 PBR's and chill atmosphere is easily enough to get me to go back there. I also sat at a table that was once an old school video game. A lot of character this place has, and it works well. Congratulations, you have changed my outlook on the LES in general. I like the relaxed atmosphere and music that I could hear clearly but was more of a background noise, not in-your-face-here-comes-the-bass music.
Oh and it was rumored that GaGa was in there about two weeks ago. One of her favorite places. But that's just here say... -
Review from Tori T.
New York, NY
Updated - 10/21/2011
Some of the reviews are hilarious. It's a fucking dive. Of course it's dirrrrty. Get over it or go to any of the douchebag bars in the LES like "Thor" or some shit. OR just stay in Williamsburg, you bunch of hipster trust fund babies who like the idea of a dive but abhor the reality of a dive in fucking New York City. Jeeeezus. What a bunch of crybabies...go cry to your fucking mom about how "gross" it is. Drinks are cheap, bartenders are friendly, the jukebox is swell. What the fuck do you want? Lemme guess: A fucking $50 punchbowl full of Earl Grey tea infused with small batch liquors, fresh ginger, bitters and all that shit? Getthefuckouttahere! Go fuck yourselves.
1 Previous Review: Show all »
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1/4/2010
It's dirty, it smells, the lock on the bathroom door has been broken for ages,what do you want? It's… Read more »
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Review from Caitlin S.
Weehawken, NJ
9/1/2011
This bar gets five stars for the jukebox alone.
I wandered in here randomly one day, and the bartender was passing my friend and I free shots of whiskey within five minutes. The Johnsons is solid. -
Review from Melissa A.
Boone, MO
Updated - 6/27/2011
Such a bummer that Welcome to the Johnson's closed! I have such wonderful and somewhat hazy memories of day drinking/happy hours/late nights spent overindulging in vodka sweet teas.
May she rest in peace.Listed in: My drunk list
1 Previous Review: Show all »
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10/14/2008
All I've gotsta say is spiked ice tea. Damn, that was a strong glass of sweet tea. Loved it though.
… Read more »
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Review from Mischa A.
New York, NY
9/10/2011
I think Denis Hopper said it best... http://youtu.be/snhiof... and at $2... Welcome to the winning!!!
Great dive bar, You want to sink into a plastic cover couch and hide from the light bright designed lines that LES is to quickly being converted to. this is the place!!! -
Review from Evan E.
10/7/2011
This place doesn't even deserve a star. I felt like I had things crawling on me as soon as I stepped into the place. I get that it's supposed to be a dive bar, but come on.
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Review from Leigh K.
6/27/2011 1 Check-in Here
Loud and tiny as all get out, but bizarrely cheap for a bar in Manhattan. The jukebox consists of pretty terrible white-people selections and there was an oddly placed pool table for patrons to fumble around which could have been better served by adding extra tables and seats.
The model/bartenders were serviceable when they weren't flirting or doing shots with each other. It was however nice and dark, with wide open windows and good breeze off the street. A good, cheap bar to kick off the night with, but not somewhere I'd want to spend more than an hour or so. -
Review from alan l.
4/18/2011
Ever imagine what it would be like to have a beer in "The Wonder Years"? Yeah, me neither, but that's pretty much what you get here.
We normally hit up this place to play pool when it's not too crowded, and for that it's a nice spot.
Unfortunately it smells a bit like you'd imagine "The Wonder Years" to smell, and I'm talking musty basement, not Winnie's perfume.Listed in: Lower East Side
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Review from Kunal M.
Washington, DC
7/7/2011 1 Check-in Here
Among the classic dive bars of the east village/LES is a dark,welcoming bar with cheap drinks, good music, a large collection of hipsters, punks, and new NYC midwesterners.
This is one of my ocassional stops whenever i am back in the city. recommended for cheap drinks and a great dive bar atmosphere. -
Review from Melissa W.
Brooklyn, NY
8/8/2011
I am scared to sit down in this bar.
I'm a huge fan of dive bars, but this is the scuzziest place I've ever seen. -
Review from Maddie O.
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Review from Stephanie N.
San Francisco, CA
7/2/2011
This bar warmed my heart when I took a vacation to NYC. San Francisco just doesn't have the same appreciation for dive bars like I do... All I need is cheap beer and shots, a pool table, and a rock n roll jukebox.
Not only did this place deliver with it's extra special divey-ness, I ended up making some friends. Being an exceptionally skilled pool player and a cute girl doesn't always go over well in a lot of places (like Cherry Tavern the night before) but I was well received here by some regulars. One of the girls who bartends invited me out my last night in town to shoot and I had a blast. I ended up coming here three times in my five day trip!
The staff was pretty cool, too. I tried to buy one of the bartenders a drink and he ended up just buying mine for me. I felt like I was at my bar back home. -
Review from Kassy M.
Brooklyn, NY
5/27/2011
Welcome to the Johnson's is not the kind of place I want to spend my entire night at, but a decent place to meet up with friends and start the night.
The pool table, ripped up couch that is probably covered in numerous guys' DNAs, and the filthy bathroom are all the appeals of Welcome to the Johnson's. -
Review from Travis K.
Rutherford, NJ
12/18/2011
i liked it. not real pretentious like some nyc bars. laid back, good crowd. great jukebox. pretty good area to go to other bars as well.
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Review from Laura A.
Manhattan, NY
3/31/2011
If you feel like sitting in your grandparent's basement drinking your dad's hidden stash of PBRs, then this is the place to go.
I really like it there, but I have to be in the mood for it.
You can never really go wrong with $2 PBRs, though. -
Review from MakeUp M.
San Francisco, CA
2/4/2011
I used to love you, WtotheJ. With your cheap beer, grungy vibe, and rocker clientele...what could I hate?
Then I bring a friend here after touting your merits on a weekend night and, not only is NO ONE at the door OR Bar, the hipster douche who was smoking outside the door (and who was probably the missing bartender) was rude to us.
After a good 5 minutes of no service, I walked out. A-holes. -
Review from Annie S.
3/31/2011
Diviest of the divey.
Smelly, crowded, dark, disgusting bathrooms with long lines, creepy basement feel. 3 stars for a different scene, but did not tickle my fancy. -
Review from Atousa F.
Brooklyn, NY
11/23/2010
I would give this place 3.5 stars, but I'm rating up. Granted, I rolled through this place drunk and on a mission to play pool, but there were pros and cons about this place:
Pros:
- Pool table!
- I think cheap booze? I kept beating dudes at pool last night which equaled free drinks for meee.
- Questionable jukebox, overall it was pretty solid.
Cons:
- Smelled like toilet.
- Hot as BALLS in the back by the pool table.
- Crowded as hell for a Monday night, but the bartender was attentive and did a damn good job of handling the crowd. Bravo!
Again, I was pretty tipsy when we made moves to come to this place, but I would probably come back to play some pool. The regulars seemed friendly enough and the drinks were strong. Overall a good vibe from this place.Listed in: Stuff Within a 4 Block Radius…
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Review from Lindsay G.
Bensonhurst, Brooklyn, NY
5/15/2011
Best Bloody Mary's Ever!....Spicy!
The atmosphere is refreshingly different. Kinda like the Brady Bunch gone grungy. Free pool, $2 PBRs, rockin juke, nice ppl-- but the bathrooms are not the cleanest *_* -
Review from Whit M.
New York, NY
11/30/2011
a great bar to stop at before goin to another spot in the lower east side. cheap pbr's and my friends picture is on the wall! bartender's are good and cool to talk to, previous bartender opened up a nightclub on ludlow, check that out after. Ludlow manor, owner used to be gaga's boyfriend.
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Review from Dana F.
Updated - 10/6/2010
Welcome to the Johnson's, thank you for opening your "That 70s Show" den to me and making my birthday awesome!
The $2 PBR was flowing, so were the water-vodkas (can't fool me, but thankfully you didn't make that mistake twice*). It was a total disappointment that the jukebox was out of order though. Your bathroom was just as disgusting as I recall - but at least you're consistent and true to form, right?
All in all, it was a great place to catch up with my best friends, albeit a bit crowded.
The real question on everyone's mind is: Who is that guy in the painting, with the combover and 70s pornstache?
* Can't say that for many boys, though.Listed in: The Breakup List
1 Previous Review: Show all »
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9/5/2010
The Johnsons are my kind of family:
- Old-school fridge stocked with $2 PBR
- $5 well drinks
- Jukebox… Read more »
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Review from Rebecca L.
Congers, NY
10/2/2010
I still love you baby. Even with all of your shitty new friends in their collared shirts taking advantage of your happy hour and slumming it on Saturday night.. You'll always smell like home to me.
xoxo -
Review from Sascha M.
8/26/2010
Cheap dive bar with skinny boys drinking PBR's in the LES. They usually play pretty good music and drinks are cheap, cheap , cheap.
Yes, the bathroom is pretty grossy but did you really expect the bathroom at the Four Seasons here? Once you're drunk enough leave and use the bathroom at one of the many other bars in the area.Listed in: Dive Bars I heart
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Review from Amy T.
7/8/2010
My sister told me I would love this place. For starters, one side of our family is indeed the Johnsons. Secondly, they live in rural western PA. You get the picture. So I walk in on a hot summer night and look around at the exposed wooden framed couch, landscape painting from the 1970's and crackled mirrored wall and say "I've been here before!"
She looks at me and says "are you sure you just aren't thinking of Grandma's house?"
She was correct. This bar pulls off the Johsnson family's rec room so well that I literally thought I was in my own Johson family's living room. Obvs this room is dirtier and filled with an eclectic group of people (young, old, hambone, hipster, just like a dysfunctional family).Listed in: Dive bars.
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Review from Richard D.
New York, NY
11/29/2010
I like how this place is unabashedly divey.
$2 PBR cans in a city full of expensive booze makes this an oasis.
I like a good value. For other value conscious consumers, you should start your night off here like a broke college student, and then finish your night and sip (very slowly) your fancy schmancy drink at some other nice place later! -
Review from Justin L.
Brooklyn, NY
1/14/2011
Cheap
Drinks and
Good music
But the place smells
So if on a date go to Magician. -
Review from Shawn A.
Astoria, NY
5/7/2010
For the most part, I try to make sure my reviews stand on their own. I don't like to reference other people's thoughts and feelings, but I just want to bring something up before I "dive" in (yeah, I went there).
A few people here claim to love dive bars, but say they were put off by the level of filth at this place. First of all, don't ever go to Mars Bar. Second of all, you don't actually like dive bars. You like nondescript Irish pubs. The best dives are the ones you leave feeling like you probably contracted something just by sitting down.
My absolutely favorite thing about Welcome to the Johnson's is just how grimey, gross... and surprisingly homey it is. The Johnson's are clearly some awesome folks, with a gross house that is everything I've ever wanted. Yeah, this place is like a dirty basement - but it's a dirty basement with a mini fridge filled with PBR. (So yes, it's perfect).
This is a completely relaxed joint ideal for some cheap beers, some vomit inducing bottom shelf shots, and great times.Listed in: The New York Bar Exam
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Review from Carly K.
New York, NY
8/30/2010
This is hands down my favorite bar in New York City. After moving to the Lower East Side about 6 months ago, my roommate and I decided to explore the neighborhood. After experimenting with a few loungey-er places, we decided to head down Rivington. All it took was a single glance at the dreamy* guy in front of the Johnson's to lure us in
* Disclaimer: "Dreamy" in the LES is defined somewhat differently than in the rest of Manhattan. I'm talking tall, thin, tattooed, pants too tight, shirt too tanktop-ey, puffing on a cigarette, and looking like he couldn't give a shit about what normal people give a shit about... like I said, "dreamy."
So in we head, and much to our delight, Mr. Wonderful quite accurately represented the general demographic. He also happened to be the bartender-- one of many beautiful people that make their living at Welcome to the Johnson's, slinging $2 PBR's, being lusted after by hipster wannabes, and kicking out asshole guys who look at you the wrong way.
The crowd is fun and unpretentious, the beer is cold and cheap, the whiskey is warm and flows like wine, and it's the perfect place to find yourself at 4 o'clock in the morning, cracking jokes and making friends.
I'll warn you: the Johnson's is not for the weary (and definitely not for the germaphobe), but it is definitely my number one recommendation for a chill, drunken, funny, random, and spontaneous night. Hey, if you play your cards right, you may even get to forget making out with a gorgeous stranger against the bathroom wall... twice. -
Review from Athena C.
9/12/2010 1 Check-in Here
They absolutely have some low price drinks. All mixed well drinks are $5 and the place is totally drive. But it can get really crowded with some terribly drunk and obnoxious people.
I would come back for some cheap drinks. -
Review from Michael K.
New York, NY
5/21/2010
I really like this place. Great jukebox with a staff of bartenders who will not hesitate to skip over a selection if it brings down the mood. Note to anyone planning to pick 'Goin' to California,' it's going to get skipped. Pool table, Galaga, chairs, $2 PBR, what else do you want?
I like everything about this place, and I really don't think it's that "filthy."
'Ace of Spades' by Motohead is a solid choice for any time of morning, afternoon or night at this establishment. Top. Notch. What else could you possibly want to know? It's cheap, it's a little dirty. They take credit cards. -
Review from Sammy S.
Manhattan, NY
8/4/2011
One of my favorite dives on Manhattan. This place gets crazy and as long as you drink enough and have friends there you will have a great time everytime. Dont go there expecting a quiet night and a martini.
