- Restaurants |
- Nightlife |
- Shopping |
- Movies |
- All
W.E.T River Trips
- Good for Kids:
- No
2 reviews for W.E.T River Trips
My bathing suit has been hiding in my closet this summer collecting dust and spiders while I twiddle away the hours talking about going to the gym, sitting on my ass at work, then sitting on my ass again at home with some bon bons and a bag of Pirates Booty.
I hate suiting up, then staring at all my in-shape friends with deep tans and even deeper lines defining their ab muscles. If I could I'd swim in a Burka. Unfortunately Burka's under life jackets are a little impractical, so for our annual girl's river rafting trip on the South Fork of the American River, I bucked up and threw on my evil spandex bikini, as well as a pair a board shorts and a tank top so I wouldn't offend anyone with my albino tummy and mom thighs.
If anything could make me forget about my body woes, it's a day of river rafting with my hot and hilarious buddies and a muscley, tobacco-dipping guide named Justin 1.
As each girl batted her eyes and sucked in her tummy, Justin 1 effortlessly guided us through roaring rapids, wildly jagged rocks and obnoxious attempts at water fights from the surrounding boats.
Justin 1 was like a breath of fresh air after Grumpy Bear, our guide from the previous year, who reeked of booze and said the term "It's not Rocket Surgery." We were fortunate enough to get such a dreamy and skilled guide after we pleaded with Justin 2 (23-year-old, horny-as-the-devil guide) not to put us with "Mogley," the kid who intentionally dumped his rafters out of the boat on the big rapids and openly ogled his customer's goodies.
But Justin 1 didn't hold a candle to the entertainment that was my girls. As we glided down the river, we tee-pee'd our paddles and yelled "Team Connie!" We gabbed about men who wet the bed. We squealed with laughter when we tried to pull each other into the boat and our bottoms fell half-way off, or we landed in each others crotches as we tumbled into the raft. We joked about dressing up as cherubs for Halloween. And ultimately, we made our guide feel wildly uncomfortable, which he apparently enjoyed because he came back to our site and showed us the ways of mountains men, i.e. he made some damn fine s'mores, and by s'mores I mean he made a drunk girl sandwich, and by a drunk girl sandwich, I mean we passed out by 9:30 pm and he went and slept in the dirt, unsatisfied.
People thought this was:
- Useful (9)
- Funny (10)
- Cool (8)
Worst rafting company EVER!
For $150 pp, we were suppose to get:
-Tents
- Food
- A decent guide
This was the worst company I have ever dealt with, but thank God to my party of 12 - we were able to have fun even though the entire company blew!!!! The owner of the WET tour ACCUSED my friend of STEALING A TENT! Who does that!?!?!
As for the tents that were suppose to have been provided for us, the owner wanted to give us a piece of TARP because the other tents were "broken" or "tent-napped" (we believe they all broken or tent-napped due to the lack to appealing service that WET provides). When the owner did bring us 3 tents, he didn't help set them up like they were suppose to.
Our dinner was stolen from us because ppl who weren't suppose to have dinner ate the dinner and WET failed to even help locate the scavengers - who were right across our campsite.
Sooooo... for people who use WET, I am warning you now to stay away... OR you can find WET's campground at Camp Lotus and help yourself to their kitchen, which is located at Campsite M and L. Apparently, I'm still waiting on the food we have paid for, so if you are coming, please let them know that you are here for Carolyn and that I've already paid for your food. Also, WARNING - if you get stuck with Shane as your guide, I just want you to know that he is new, barely talks and doesn't know how to host (in other words, he shouldn't be there).
Also, I would like to note that this was my 2nd Time on the American River. The first time was with Gold Rush and OMG - the guys at Gold Rush were AMAZING compared to these jackholes. I should have booked with them!
