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Categories: Vegetarian, Coffee & Tea, Wine Bars, Vegan
Neighborhood: Fort GreeneLafayette Ave (C)
Fulton St (G)
One star for the culturally aware and socially relevant open mike night that came complimentary with our mocha last Tuesday.
One star right off the bat for injecting a little art and a & creative space into the neighborhood.
One star for being the kind of place you can stand that your lady will love.
A "coffee shop" actually needs to be able to serve you "coffee" instead of just an espresso-based Americano, though. A sandwich shop should realize that their menu is a kind of advertising tool and its important to be honest about what selections you are prepared to provide people.
Organic concoctions made right on the spot, and in front of you if you are at the counter, which are fresh and delicious.
Not that much of a variety and usually a portion of the menu is not available ( minus a star ).
Not very busy during the week - can easily bring a group there.
Smooch gets an average of 2 stars for me. As a restaurant/food-offerer, it gets 3 stars. As a coffeeshop, it gets 1.5 stars. The average of that, I know, is 2.25 stars, but the utter crappiness of the coffee, the severely flawed service (I know it's hard to stay focused with such a beautiful view outside, but do your job, k?), and the high prices take away that quarter-star.
Also, don't you just cringe at places that try SO HARD to be cool? The dumb names of the dishes, the aloof vibe of the workers, the consciously "cultural" music. Get real (literally).
Why you should still go here: if you are a freelancer or an otherwise floating computer-hugger who wants to lounge around in a comfortable space that has OK food and sort of drinkable coffee--without being harassed about how long you've stayed--this is your place.
I'm not sure there's more to say: it's a great space, the coffee is gooooood, the carrot cake is pretty awesome (if it's there, just get it), and all you have to know that sometimes you won't get your $4 latte right away, and sometimes it is impossible to get your check. But I'm ok with that.
Because the coffee really is my vote for best in the neighborhood.
So I peek into Smooch on a recent weeknight and it's looking pretty nice; clean, cozy, well-lit... I hear that they've been shooting that new HBO series "Bored to Death" inside, so that's probably the impetus for exterminating the flies...
Anyway, we need a place to go after a show at BAM for some drinks and desert, so I think "Smooch looks like they've cleaned up their act - let's give them another shot."
So we sit down at a table and the barista brings out some menus. But it's after 5 so we can't actually order anything off of them, and there's no table service, anyway (which we discover after sitting around waiting for a good 15 minutes as Hipsterbarista plays with his iTunes). So why did he bring us menus? Odd.
There's a sandwich on the menu named "To All the Yelpers Who Bashed Us" or something equally Sufjanesque. I'm charmed that they've named a sandwich after me.
I guess we have to order at the counter. That's fine. It would have been nice if the DJ... er... barista had told us that when he gave us the useless menus... Or, you know, we're sitting at a table RIGHT NEXT TO THE BAR so he could just look over the top of his macbook screen and ask us what we want.
Whatever. We step up to the bar. We order a few teas, hot chocolate, etc. The only pastry left is one lonely chocolate chip muffin so we decide to split it. He's going to toast it. Okay, that's nice of him.
Oh no, he's making a chai latte instead of chai tea... oh well, no big deal - not worth complaining about.
"Do you have any milk and sugar for this Earl Grey?" DJ Barista looks baffled as though I am the first person to ever ask for milk and sugar with their tea. Who drinks black tea straight?
I take a sip. There's no tea in my tea! This isn't Earl Grey, this is tea-infused milky hot water. And I thought my grandmother made weak tea...
"Excuse me ... I'm sorry, but this tea is pretty weak - do you think I could get another tea bag?"
Again, he looks at me like I have two heads. He begrudgingly obliges. This guy is starting to weird me out...
The muffin is ready! Finally! Wait... this isn't chocolate chip, it's a low-fat bran muffin. With raisins. Why didn't he tell us it was a freaking diet raisin bran muffin? What is wrong with this guy?
No use complaining - he's back to his iTunes, again. His music isn't even that good.
"Check, please." Oh, he's charged us for one extra tea. For the tea bag? Are you kidding? No, I'm not paying for that.
"All right, then don't pay for it." Okay ... I won't. Is there something on my face? Stop staring at me like that!
Smooch, you've still got it.
So I'm wandering around Fort Greene looking for a place to sit down for an hour, have some coffee… Read more »
If you want to get a guaranteed kiss on a first date, read very carefully...
I've been spying on a few players who brought their A-game to the table and here's how they do it in 10 simple steps:
1) Shower
2) Dress clean and casual. Don't forget to put on some pants
3) Tell your date to meet you for drinks or coffee, or both, at Smooch
4) Greet date inside the small but intimate cafe with a kiss on the cheek and their favorite flower (or dozen of them)
6) Snag one of the elevated corners, especially the side with the sofa and cowhide walls. Laugh over the creative
names on their menu
6) LADIES FIRST, Or Queens for my sexy brethren. Allow her to order anything she wants. Make sure you bring extra $
because some of the items are clearly overpriced. If she is a vegetarian or vegan, it won't spoil the night here
because they have delicious alternatives just for her. If she's hungry for meat besides yourself, suggest a "Let's Be
Nice To Everyone Except The Assholes Who've Trashed Us On Yelp" Sandwich Of Harmony
7) GENTLEMEN SECOND. Order an alcoholic beverage for yourself. Get a beer ($5-7) to look casual or a glass of wine
if she is more "sophisticated"
8) TALK. The food may take 10-15 minutes since they prepare it as it is ordered (or certain staff may be distracted,
which they are famous for here) so ask her how her day went. Nod a lot. Talk about random things like books you're
reading at the moment, her dreams, new shows, the neighborhood. Nonchalantly point out that HBO filmed parts of
their new show "Bored to Death" in this very cafe/winebar, you know-it-all stud you!
9) EAT. When the food arrives, observe the moment of silence as she devours it. It might be the only chance you get.
Chew with your mouth closed and swallow before you speak to save any future embarrassment
10) WRAP IT UP. Pay on your way out and grab her hand as you walk out the door while continuing your conversation.
Put your coat over her shoulders to warm her up and walk towards the park on DeKalb. Stop her in front of the tree
by the benches outside the cafe and give her a firm but soft kiss
If she doesn't resist, begin to walk her towards your apartment. You might even want to go back inside to get 2 of their amazing cortados to go if you plan on staying up all night. Do stop at any of the bodegas conveniently located 2 blocks from both directions on DeKalb for any of your last minute needs such as milk, cookies, eggs, condoms, or Little Debbie snacks so you two will not have to step out of the pad until the sun rises.
This place is a perfect and peaceful work environment, and bring your own food and coffee because you'll never be served hear. Everyone is too busy searching the Internet.
Awesome cafe / restaurant located in one of the best neighborhoods in Brooklyn.
The food is always consistent, although a bit overpriced. They have a few great vegan options, which I'm appreciative of since there aren't too many (good) options in this area. The coffee is strong and tasty, and the service is very friendly. The joint is small, with crowded seating - but if you get the couches in the back you are golden. There's also some seating outside.
Tip: Have the owner make your latte, they're the best.
Ditto everyone on here about the bad service. Seriously. It's GODAWFUL. Wouldn't be an understatement or over-exaggeration to call it the worst I've ever had..
Food is decent. And it's a great place in the neighborhood to hop on WiFi for the day and get some work done over a good cup of coffee.
But be prepared to wait for half an hour for that coffee. And to get an "oh, you didn't get it yet?" when you remind the waitress about that very same cup. And um, still not get it. When the place isn't even half full. So yeah. Suckiest. Service. Ever.
UNLESS. You go when one of the nice Australian guys is working. Then you're good.
Oh and one other thing. Flies. FLIES!
Be prepared to guzzle your coffee drink fast cause by the time you pick up the cup to take a second sip, so many flies will have alighted upon the rim, that there will remain no untouched spot for your lips to safely drink.
With all the dogs milling around outside, I can only imagine what those flies were sitting on before they landed on my cup.
And I think one of those flying things bit me too.
It's not even the (slow) service, snottiness, prices (high), or flies (lots), that i have issues with at this place. All these things are to be expected in a cafe of this genre. But this place used to provide at least a great cup of coffee with awesome beans and trained baristas and a place to sit without getting eaten alive.
The coffee itself has gone from great to ok, and worse--I think this place has bedbugs! Sitting there I saw (and felt) multiple creatures crawling all over me and my things, and i left with bites! Not flies, but other crawling bugs! All indications that this place doesn't give a hoot about the customer--or possibly does give too much of a hoot about making the customer unhappy? it's a weird place!
In reading the other reviews, I agree that in general the place is a hipster haven, but coming from swim practice near by with my gym bag, I never get odd looks. The staff have been friendly with me and there's space to spread out and get comfy while reading the paper for an hour or so.
And most importantly, the coffee is the best I've had in Brooklyn. Delish. Their muffins are really good too, rivaling Blue Sky. A bit pricy, but worth it.
This is conveniently located a block and a half from my apartment on Carlton Ave. The staff is super friendly, and the place has some great outdoor benches for you and your dog to sit and relax while enjoying breakfast or lunch.
The pesto scrambled eggs with toast are excellent, and I even managed to finish the greens that accompanied them.
I only wish they stayed open later during the weekdays.
I love zones.
Space zones, trippy zones, discovery zones, chill zones. If I am planning to do more than feast at an establishment, I look for a welcoming zone embodying some of the aforementioned qualities of the aforementioned zones. ()() ZONES ()()
Smooch is cool because it provides a plethora of zones:
MYSTERIOUS ZONE: the name isn't anywhere!
FOREIGN ZONE: the man has an accent and some people are frogs
COMF ZONE: the chairs are comf
SNUGGLE ZONE: little nooks and crannies to be cozy in, preferably in a somewhat sexual manner (though appropriately and legally) with a lady (or ze).
DELICIOUS ZONE: product is great. coffee is strong. cookies are tasty.
SOUND ZONE: Stereolab and Manu Chao on the juke.
PUP ZONE: loads piling around outside
HIP ZONE: peeps are well dressed and good looking.
Overall a pretty perfect coffeeshop zone that is WAY BETTER THAN TILLIE'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
$9.75 for a hummus sandwich!? Are they kidding? The folks running the show were nice, if a bit distracted. Mint iced tea was pretty good, but I couldn't get over the price. Organic or not, a hummus sandwich should never be more the $7.
They may have overcharged me, so it might be my fault I paid so much, but they had such a screwy payment system I was thrown for a loop
i walked in here the other day with my friend to grab some brunch, but ick it just gave me such a bad feeling. i don't know what it was.. but the servers made me feel so uncomfortable with her judging eyes, like EW what ARE you doing here you non-hipster straight out of soccer practice girl??
i do like their inventive method of utilizing city property to expand their restaurant, i.e., benches on the fence lining the trees.
also, the naming convention for their food is pretty witty. though, the one that was called "for all those yelpers who bashed us" or whatever irked me
My last memory of Smooch, end of summer: I go in to give the place another chance. I feel like I've entered a glass box in the zoo labeled "Habitus Brooklynus." (Note: I am a Brooklynite myself) There are half a dozen elaborately under-dressed staff members squeezed behind the tiny counter. They have no other choice but to face the door and me, by default. But they are extraordinarily skilled at avoiding eye contact and pretending to be busy. I stand at the counter and stare at them, but let them finish "what they're doing," to see how long it takes them to serve me. After finishing their conversations and adjusting their hair, eyewear, headdresses and body hardware, they launch into complex and mysterious rituals involving the preparation of food. Back and forth they pass the same plate of food, with each member of the staff playing a critical role in the plate's assembly or presentation. Some scratch their heads over the mescalin salad. Others put scones or potatoes or what-is-it on the plate with their bare hands. Yet another wipes the greasy fingerprints on the edge of the plate with a filthy rag. Finally, the owner appears beside me and interrupts this fascinating reverie. He is amiable, and takes my order for an iced coffee. After paying what may be the highest price ever for an iced coffee in the BK, again I am lulled into another hypnotic trance watching as he delegates the order to a staff member, who performs a lengthy interpretive dance of being baffled by the search for cold cups, ice, and the pouring of coffee. Finally, the staff member hands me my coffee. Me: "I asked for light with half and half." Staff member: "We don't have half and half." WTF?? Line crossed, Smooch. I am willing to suspend a lot of disbelief in the name of supporting "small business," but you are a cafe. A place that serves coffee. How hard is that? How hard is it to take an order for some coffee to be poured into a cup? You have exorbitant prices paired with lousy service, and you don't even stock the standard products that allow customers to prepare their overpriced drink the way they want it. Amazing! If you go to this place, go for the anthropological experience, not for service. xoxAli
So their iced Americano is good. So their menu is clever. As a general rule, I don't frequent places that are terrible to work for, and have had two friends work here and describe the owner/work conditions. Both quit, both described the owner as some sort of petty tyrant, which I saw in action on a couple of visits, and haven't been back since. If you don't mind spending your dollars on a dude who doesn't seem to care much about his employees, they do serve a decent coffee. Otherwise, Catherine's Caffe (more Eastern Euro, less hipster, equally good food/drink) and Bittersweet (equally hipster, just plain coffee shop) are 10 feet away.
What people have said here is pretty much right on point.
The good: their muffins are amazing, coffee is decent, the place is small but comfy.
The bad: the people who work here are snooty and unwelcoming, there's a very strong hipster vibe that pretty much makes it uncomfortable to enjoy the comfiness.
It's too bad, but the atmosphere was so weird, I ate my muffin and drank my coffee as fast as I could so I didn't have to deal with it for long.
Excellent coffee, hilarious menu, great decor, and the best-looking dogs in Fort Greene, home of many a cute dog.
FYI, Smooch once had on offer "Breast Milk Lattes." Ask them about it.
A great little place. One of the few places to get a flat white (or a proper milk based coffee in NY).
Great space and charming measured service
This is quite possibly the coolest cafe ever! It has a really unique layout. It is very comfortable with a few different atypical lounging/hanging out spots. The food and coffee is good. The coffee is really good. The owner and workers are all really friendly and interesting. Plus, the people that come in are also very friendly and interesting. The only down side to it all is that it is really expensive.
If it was cheaper I would go there all the time!
Pre
TEN
tious
with a bad vibe.
I was ignored while I waited at the counter for a good 5 minutes. So I left. And even though I walk by it everyday because I live down the street, I refuse to ever go in again.
Too bad, it has potential to be a cool place.
Not sure what was in the vegan sandwich, but the bread was delicious. I don't know what I was expecting of a place called smooch, but it's not what I pictured. Perhaps I imagined a romantic fancy place. It's definitely not that. But if you have some work to get done and need some healthy food to get you through that paper/report/video game you're working on, come on down! Would be a great place to bring a bunch of folks you haven't seen in a while to catch up.
Total Agreement on the Pretension level of this place. Woah. From the chic making my coffee to all her little regulars... Jesus H.
I went in on a Thursday early morning and the place was PACKED. This I can understand from what looks like a very lovely menu & such a nice, calming interior space. I would have stayed longer with laptop (free wifi) and ordered food if it werent for two things:
1. My $3.50 ice coffee - Granted, one of the best ice coffees ever - but so expensive.
2. The people yapping away abt art shows and their tattoos.. can we save this for later in the day please?
At some point, I will go try the food - looked nice and fresh!
As long as you're not in a rush, this place is great for breakfast or lunch. It's a super relaxing, low key, come and stay all day kind of place. Their vegan sandwiches and salads are scrumptious and they make really good coffee drinks as well.
Hip and hidden, but not too much.
Cute little coffee shop. Tasty pastries and cookies. Delicious coffee and really good masala chai.
A little less clinical than Tillie's, further up DeKalb. and super convenient if you walk down DeKalb to the train station.
Now this is a vegan restaurant that I can get down with! My friend Kalalea opened this place several months ago, and it is truly the bomb! The vegan muffins are too die for (especially the peach/strawberry, toasted with a lil pat o butta), The breakfast sandwich with hummus is my staple, and the tofu sandwich which is called the "Vegan Goddess" simply makes me swoon.
This is vegetarian fare with flava, damn it! And I mean this in every since of the word! Located right in the heart of Fort Greene, people of all races, colors, and proclivities, make their way to this neighborhood joint. It's where you go to get your cup o Joe, read the paper, chat with a local, set up your laptop to do some work, or just sit outside in one of their comfy chairs and just watch the time pass. It's so lovely. I live in Williamsburg and commute to this place, ok? Dedication, baby.
I believe the people who say they love this place and feel totally at home here. However, I would never be friends with them. This place just gives me the creeps.
Let's get this out of the way: I'm almost positive that they advertise as being a vegan or vegetarian restaurant yet serve chicken, actual chicken made out of dead chickens. I'm sure it's organic as hell, but still, I find that strange.
Other things that give me the creeps: I don't like the decor, it feels stuffy, and one time I went there it was buzzing with flies like some organic hippie overpriced Ethiopian death camp.
The tea tasted good.
I mean, it's a little cafe. Well, it's a bit more special cause they will serve you some alcohol. Yes. No! Shuckz, when did we become all these hapless alcoholics? Oh, yeah, back in High School, yes, I remember. Trying to snag some half racks of Molson Ice ("Dude, Ice beers get you drunker faster, man!") at local 7-Eleven . . .
Anyway, the place is kind of cute, I suppose, in that I-Want-to-Open-Up-a-Cafe-with-an-Alcohol-License-i n-Clinton-Hill way, totally different from Tilly's traditional Coffee House stylings.
Yes, they have kind of a decent food selection, so you should check it out. I do enjoy getting a little bite - a moofin or something (definitely get it toasted with some butter, since it's kind of dry and rough - out on their little benches before/after playing tennis at Fort Greene park.
Some of my friends like to take their notebooks and compute there, but I haven't been writing much of late, so when I leave the apt, I try not to take my boxes with me. What does that all mean? F if I know. I guess I tried to get a bit Smooochie and failed or something. Gimme another drink!
Taking advantage of the "update" feature, I'll say a few more words about Smooch:
THE
SERVICE
KINDA
STINKS.
I don't care how cool you are, how hip you are, how organic/cage-free/fair trade/vegan WHATEVER the ingredients are. I'm not saying my food wasn't good and my cappuccino wasn't delicious, for the second time-- but last time I was in here, it was like pulling teeth to get served. I am not very picky or hard to please in terms of service, especially in a very relaxed atmosphere like the one at Smooch. Some time to sit and talk with my friends was nice. But fifteen full minutes before someone came to take our order? I don't like that.
It's just frustrating, guys.
So....I was taken to Smooch by a friend who really, really loves it there. (It may have something… Read more »
So I can't scream and shout out about the great beer selection, but at least it had unusual and diverse choices. The wine list was extensive with a few organic choices too but most of all, I totally loved the little, shoe less sitting area to the left of the entrance. Who wouldn't want to stretch out, shoes off, warm coffee in hand, to flip through art books, to talk with their friends, or just pet the damn cute cow print wall hanging and upholstery?
The bar tenders were very friendly, discussing the gems of the neighborhood with my friend who is thinking of moving into the area. They told us about all of the other local bars and restaurants that they think we should go check out.
We didn't eat any food, but the atmosphere alone is well worth it. And the menu looks fabulous and affordable.
Brunch was excellent. Some of the best tofu scrambles ive ever tasted. The muffins are delicious. The prices are good. The neighborhood is awesome and great to take a stroll around after enjoying your meal. fresh squeezed lemonade was yummy. It was crowded but they made room for us. Very cute place.
Only downside is that its cash only
This coffee is some of the absolute best I've had in Brooklyn.
They had the best red velvet and carrot cake I've had and they happened to be vegan (and I'm not vegan) . They also have chocolate, tho I didn't get to try it.
The ambiance is perfect for the conversation - comfortable seating with plush pillows with extra-cozy nooks at either end of the place. Music was nice, noninvasive jazz.
Our server, Chris, was noticeably, genuinely personable and it ended up feeling like "a place where everyone knows your name."
They also have a full menu, but I didn't even get into that.
This is 1 block away from lovely Fort Greene Park and has become a personal favorite to visit as often as possible.
This is my ideal spot for a low-key weekend brunch. It's super casual, not crowded, and the food is tasty (even if they don't have a "real" kitchen). The multi-grain toast is especially good (as are the accompanying preserves... though you have to ask for them).
On a nice day, the shaded benches out front are perfect for coffee, eggs, and the paper.
This was my first opportunity to just fucking relax after catching a red-eye from the West Coast and enduring the packed rush hour subway ride from JFK. And of course, all of this followed several days of no sleep because I'm retardedly irresponsible like that and once I get to drinking, I pretty much lose all foresight which presupposes the fact that I had any to begin with.
Anyway, as I emerged from the station, the weather in Brooklyn was perfect. Sunny clear skies and warm with a slightly cool breeze. I suddenly felt so alive! Strolling down Dekalb, I became reanimated as I snidely took note of what the poor saps back in San Francisco had to deal with: sunny clear skies accompanied by a freezing ocean draft. It's sad actually, to have to endure being perpetually mindfucked and cockteased by the elements. And here I was, going all the way and it was great. Smooch awaited like a post-coital cigarette. I ordered an omlette (organic!) and a beer (locally brewed!). Then I sat outside, soaked up the sun, ate, drank, and chain-smoked over good conversation. If living is like chasing that first high, Smooch was like trying a new drug.
I really like this place. Its a great way to laze away a relaxed weekend afternoon. Love the outdoor, treelined benches. Love the fact that you can really take the time to savor your coffee and food without hassle. Love that I can go with a group of friends and just relax for a bit. Not to mention the food is really good and the Vegan Red Velvet and Carrot Cake are delish. If you are in a hurry and looking for a coffee to be slammed in front of you in 30 seconds flat, this is not the place for you.
I'm having a really delicious muffin in a really nice cafe. What's not to like? The sandwiches look & smell great! And the staff is so nice! Maybe I'm just used to crappy and annoying cafes, but this is really nice change of pace. Plus, the wireless if fast, so I can do research here. Yay!
Very simple menu, great brunch.
This is by far, my fave spot for brunch. I would recommend their eggs over their waffles which were nutty and grainy. And sitting outside is great but be prepared to cover your food from the flies. Also, it's a great spot to meet people you've never met or know through friends and just watch the passers-by.
I'm disappointed in the bad vibe people got here because I actually really liked it. Maybe I just wound up there on a good night. The Aussie owner was soo nice, and he took a lot of time on my sandwich.. which I appreciated because it tasted amazing! I'm never in Fort Greene, so it's doubtful if I'll be back anytime soon, but I did enjoy the one experience I had there.
Hippie soul food that far transcends the over-woked kale and tofu of my youth.
In spite of the narrow space and sometimes awkward seating, I'm all about it.
WiFi and 10% Student Discount!
Neighborhood: East Village
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Neighborhood: Fort Greene
Category: Coffee & Tea
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Category: American (Traditional)
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Category: Juice Bars & Smoothies
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Category: Vegetarian
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Category: Coffee & Tea
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