No Idea Tavern

 

0

43

Gunnar V.

MD

I know that there are a bunch of people who will gasp for air when they see one star. "One Star?" they will ask. There were a fair amount of people there for a Thursday night. But bear with me.

On the plus side, one of the bartenders was very friendly. The beers there are very large (20oz) and $5 or $6. The rail drinks were pints, mostly ice and not strong, but only $4. So far, not so bad, right?

Then we ordered food. Tater tots seem to be a popular item there. Most of the other people we saw order food seemed to get grilled cheese and tots. Safe. If only we knew.

We ordered a basket of tots, buffalo chicken tenders, and a half pound of steamed shrimp. Okay, so the tots were deep fried and therefore better than the ones you make in your oven. The chicken was from-a-bag type, and deep fried to oblivion. Which might have been tolerable if I were not trying to saw through it with the flimsiest plastic utensils you have ever seen on a styrofoam plate. The "buffalo" sauce was an incredibly acrid vinegary problem. It was inescapable but the chicken was so tough it just didn't matter.

The cole slaw was an extra-ordinary experience. It faintly recalled kim chee -- in a bad way, somehow vaguely fermented. Whatever it was held together with had the consistency of year-old carpenter's glue. We decided that this side dish should be called "Elmer's Kim Chee".

The crown jewel of the night was the steamed shrimp. It came after we had thrown in the towel on the chicken. We hoped they had forgotten. I mean, how long does it take to steam shrimp, 2 minutes? We should be so lucky. Someone from the kitchen brings it out (probably 20 minutes in to the experience) and says (I am not kidding) "Sorry, we don't have a steamer". What? Then WTF happened to this shrimp back there? Why would you call it "steamed shrimp" on the menu?

What we got was a bowl of medium sized, tough shrimp in a pool of some kind of Old Bay gravy with a bunch of  sliced potatoes. We could only conclude that the shrimp were microwaved. The Old Bay glop was nightmarish. It was like raunchy BBQ sauce.

Maybe that place is fine for drinks and maybe it's even fine for eating if you stick to grilled cheese and tots. For god's sake be careful if you must order elsewhere on the menu. They do have a trivia night, which might be fun.

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