"best to just get a Bloody Mary and try not to think about it."
(in 4 reviews)
"I play/hear 'I Can't Go for That' on the jukebox."
(in 7 reviews)
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My Father's Place
Rating Details »
Categories: Restaurants, Dive Bars [Edit]
Neighborhoods: Southeast Portland, Industrial District, Central Eastside523 SE Grand Ave
Portland, OR 97214
(503) 235-5494
- Price Range:
-
$
- Accepts Credit Cards:
- Yes
- Parking:
- Street
- Attire:
- Casual
- Good for Groups:
- Yes
- Good for Kids:
- No
- Takes Reservations:
- No
- Delivery:
- No
- Take-out:
- No
- Waiter Service:
- Yes
- Wheelchair Accessible:
- Yes
- Outdoor Seating:
- No
- Good for:
- Breakfast, Late Night
- Music:
- Juke Box
- Best Nights:
- Mon, Tue, Wed
- Happy Hour:
- Yes
- Alcohol:
- Full Bar
- Smoking:
- Yes
- Coat Check:
- No
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51 reviews for My Father's Place
Review Highlights
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I needed a few days to write this review. It took a few days until I could get that chicken fried steak out of my system. Ok, you look at that last statement and look at my 4 star review and think something is wrong here. The chicken fried steak was oh so good. The good ones usually take a few days until they get off your gut. At least in my humble estimation the do.
Went here with a friend. My first time. His first time in a few years as he used to live in the neighborhood and frequented this establishment whence he lived around these parts. I'm always game for new places, but hadn't come here previous to this year as this place was known as one of those really smoky bars. Smoking ban=dan h going to more places he had never been to.
We walked in and found a booth. Crowd was pretty mellow. I guess this would be considered a dive bar or a hipster bar. Whatever. People seemed to be enjoying themselves without causing a ruckus and that is always nice. We ordered a pitcher of beer and it was rather large. Not a bad thing. Then my friend mentioned the chicken fried steak. Mind you, it was getting late at this point, but he swore by it and who am I to not eat a chicken fried steak? It was everything he said it would be and more. Huge portion of chicken fried steak with home fries, eggs and a side of toast for $6.75. It was a meal for a king. A very heavy king.
So, that is my story and I'm sticking by it. Go here for the cheap beer and stay for the chicken fried steak. Just know you probably won't need to eat the next day.
The smoke has cleared and the true grit of MFP has been revealed.
This place is dirty. as. shit.
You just couldn't tell before, when the cloud of smoke enveloped everything.
Eating directly under an air vent that has two inch long dust trails clinging to it for dear life is not appetizing. It's unfortunate that details like this seem to be absent from health inspection forms.
1 Previous Review: Show all »
-
2/2/2008
Dear "A L",
I love MFP. I've loved eating here, drinking here and hanging out with friends here since… Read more »
Monday morning 8ish. Service fast and somewhat friendly. Food came quickly and was decent. Love diners and sometimes see lots of people hanging out in front when I drive by in the mornings.
Had the hobo omlette which was a carnivore's dream accompanied by hash browns and wheat toast. Nothing to write home about, but was decent.
Wow, just got the bill, CHEAP. $8.75 with coffee. Still, I probably wouldn't take visiting friends here because there are lots of other better choices for breakfast.
Cheap good eats. Sometimes a little slow when it gets crowded if you make it here by late morning on the weekend, but them's the brakes.
The douchey comments about the dust in a friggin dive bar offending delicate sensibilities need to make like a tree and get lost. MFP is my steady breakfast date and nobody makes my girl cry except for ME.
Excellent food in this dive bar. I like the old charm to it and the bacon (aka steakon) is great. I had it with eggs and had it on a bacon burger. I have to go back here when I go back to Portland again.
My fathers place rocks!
As diner's go, this is a good'un. I mean, when you go to a diner you expect certain things, good coffee, reasonable prices, good food, decent service, etc. We got all that here!
Sure, it's a little dirty (the carpet is gross), but the bathrooms were clean and that's usually how you can tell if a kitchen is clean! So, I don't have any problems with "dust trails" from the air vents or dust on the antiques (per other reviewers), as long as the bathroom is clean, it's likely the kitchen is clean!
Well done! We'll be back!
I'd like to extend a heartfelt thank-you to you, Oh place of my father. Thank you for the cheap eats. Thank you very much for those. Thank you for the six dollar garden burger with cheese WITH accompanying side of tater tots and ranch. That is dirt cheap. That I appreciate. Thank you, also, for the insanity that is your triple-decker grilled cheese sandwich. That is excessive and delightful and cheesy and pleasant, and it is also only five bucks or so which is, as well, awesome.
Thank you for the two dollar Hamms. Thank you for the strong drinks and the spacious seating. I don't hate any of that. Thank you for the pool tables upon which I can embarrass myself per usual. And thank you for the outdoor seating, perfect for smoking and schmoozing and people-watching and general hang outtage.
I don't thank you for your lackluster service, however. I don't thank you for your impossibly blase bartenders and waitresses and their apparent general disregard for my comfort as a guest in your establishment. That... that is something for which I cannot thank you. However, if you could up the ante in terms of customer service and attentiveness to patrons, I could give you a far more hearty and genuine thank-you that would run from my veins into your establishment for many moons to come.
Very cheap, but not very clean. Antique toys hanging from the ceiling are covered in dust so thick it looks like moss.
I felt bad for the staff. They were furiously trying to clean everywhere they could reach before the boss walked in and growled at them on the way to the kitchen.
My tomato and swiss scramble came out as an american and tomato omelet with bitter tomatoes and tasteless fake cheese.
At these prices I wasn't expecting fine dining, but I shouldn't have been afraid of 'stuff' falling from the sky.
Three good reasons to visit My Father's Place:
1. You're waiting to get tattooed at Sea Tramp down the street so you decide to calm the old nerves with a cheap drink and a spot of CCR on the juke.
2. You had a one night stand and now she/he has suggested going out for the obligatory breakfast. You're not sure if you ever want to see this individual again and you could really use a hair of the dog, so you head to MFP for a cheap ass grease fest and a bloody. (By the way, if you actually do want to score another date with this person you take em to the Tin Shed or Genies).
3. You have a hankering to play pool.
Hunny brought me here before we headed to OMSI. I had the country breakfast, which was good, but the biscuits were a bit hard. The service was good and it had a lot of fun things to look at while you eat!
good burger,great friendly service ,my wife and brother in law loved thier meal and he commented on how great the bacon was, our bill was cheap and the food came quickly too,would go back again
My Father's Place (or, My Father's Palace, as we used to call it) is a dirty little stink hole of a bar/restaurant. The drinks are cheap and the tater tots are steaming. When I lived on E. Burnside I went here all the time. Actually, it didn't matter where I lived. I went here all the time anyway.
There are tons of booths, a great jukebox, and they serve food pretty much the whole time. They also open at the ass crack of dawn, so you can a) get your drink on to avoid DTs, or b) get your drink on to bypass your hangover. I went here for brunch on New Year's Day '05. Yes, I was underage, but I had a really good fake ID, so it's not their fault. The reason it gets 4 stars instead of 5 is because their breakfast is terrible. The eggs are watery and thin, and nothing is really that appetizing (except for the tater tots... yum...), but, it's cheap and good for large groups who want to get ruined at any hour.
I missed this place on my last visit to Portland, and I won't let that happen again.
This place is perfect. I stopped by around lunch and ate breakfast. The menus are witty and very comprehensive. The waitress was kind, attentive, and very helpful. The food was delicious, and just what I wanted. The best part about it, after my friend and I ordered a full breakfast, and were completely sated, the bill was a whopping $13.00!
The food is typical American cuisine, and there isn't a plethora of vegetarian options. But myself being a vegetarian, and my friend being a carnivore, we were both very happy with the selection and found exactly what we wanted.
The ambiance is that of any old-timey diner, with some Portlandish flair. Such as the all-year round miniature lit christmas tree.
I really enjoyed this place, and if you're looking for a local diner alternative to Denny's blandness, this place is perfect.
Having lived literally right across from My Father's Place, I have some fantabulous stories revolving around it.
And some normal ones too. More normal than fantabulous. Whatever.
Go here.
Drink beer.
Or not- maybe just eat some truly greezy, bar foods.
So very good, and I miss the Portland prices and cute bartenders.
i went here for breakfast and was blown away by how cheap the place was. maybe its just being from the bay area but i loved being able to get the staples of the usual breakfast; eggs, toast, hashbrowns, waffles, etc for dollars less than im used to. but otherwise its a basic breakfast joint. lots of comfy booths and from my experience, a pretty friendly staff. id go here again. i didnt have one but im told the bloody mary's are great also.
i did find it funny that some drunk dude who lived up above was about as shitfaced as could be and fell off the chair he was sitting on and the staff declared that if he could get back up on his chair they'd give him another beer. thats just good business.
I haven't been back to MFP since the smoking ban. Maybe that says something about the place, or maybe it says something about me. Either way, the world keeps on changing.
1 Previous Review: Show all »
-
1/17/2008
MFP is my magic happy place. The food is cheap and satisfying, although don't expect miracles to be… Read more »
Have you ever lain awake in cold sweat, unable to sleep because of all the fried food you've eaten?
I have! And you will too if you come here around 1 am with the drunken munchies and bad intentions. Cheap, delicious, really gross (in a good way) bad food. Food that a sweaty Italian dad smoking cigarettes in a wifebeater would eat. Also, this dad looks like Robert DeNiro. Get the picture?
I for one love sweaty Dads, fringe lamps, kitschy decor, and a pound of chili cheese fries for the perfect nightcap. But if you have really weird dreams that night about boxing with Al Pacino in a bikini, don't say I didn't warn you.
I've been coming here off and on over the years, ever since a bona fide skeezy coked-out barfly I befriended at the Vern recommended it to me. I didn't like her Yellowtail Shiraz, but I have to give her props on this place.
It's a perfect Portland dive bar, and even more so since it's on the Eastbank across from a homeless shelter. The breakfasts have always been fantastic, that is if you don't mind greasy grill-prepared food (it's not THAT bad, though); and the burgers are kick-ass, especially that one with bleu cheese on it. The drinks are reasonably priced, the bartenders neither ditsy tit-wiggling sports bar morons nor overly curt and surly opossums.
Now, if my father were still alive I wouldn't eat at his place, since dinner would be a bottle of Jack or Henry's accompanying that awful Van de Camp Salisbury steak TV dinner, the sort that they probably feed to inmates in Guantanemo to reward a "confession" made under suitable duress. But, I will eat at My Father's Place, and I will drink here - sometimes quite a bit, in fact!
One star because the atmosphere was so good. Low hanging fringey lights over the booths, 70's bar in back and a pretty diverse crowd - truck drivers and PIBS all hanging out together (pibs = people in black).
But, on a Sunday morning in March 2008, my friend and I waited an hour and the furthest we got was a table and menus. And we had to ask for everything. We placed our own bar order to alleviate the tedium but had to beg to have the drink brought to our booth since we had a table. Then, after an hour of smoke filled starvation, we couldn't even get the server to make eye contact to pay for the dang drink. And yes, we stood up at our table with our coats in our hands as the cue.
Unless you have oodles of time, love eating your food with a HEAVY dose of cigarette smoke or know someone who works there, find a new dive breakfast place to after-party. I know we did.
I have yet to have lunch at MFP, but can honestly say that MFP was the best breakfast I've had yet in Portland. The bacon, crispy yet juicy, was super delicious (I am serious about bacon), and the biscuit and hashbrowns were just as tasty. My acquaintance ordered the Chicken Fry, whatever it was, and was equally impressed. We plan on returning often.
On to the beverages, the Deluxe Bloody Mary was intense and the mimosas were served with extra "champagne".
Even better, two meals (we both had leftovers as well) and three drinks cost $20.95. And the bacon, oh god the bacon... so good.
Old dudes, young dudes, hip dudes, dork dudes. High skirts, low skirts, bitch skirts, fun skirts. Cool smoke, cancer smoke, coat smoke, hair smoke. Cheap burger, cheap beer, cheap burger, cheap beer.
It's an institution, really.
Things that occur when I visit My Father's Place:
1. I see at least 1 person I know, often 3.
2. Far too many cigarettes are smoked.
3. There is typically a great deal of laughter (very loudly, on my part)
4. Inevitably, tater tots are eaten, despite my best efforts and repeated declarations that I won't touch them! I guess they're just my destiny...or I haven't any tater tot self-control (i like to think it's the former).
5. I play/hear 'I Can't Go for That' on the jukebox. God bless Hall & Oates.
Actually, those things kind of sum up all of Portland to me. MFP is totally symbolic. tripsville.
What's really horrible is when you hang out here at night and then someone suggests you go eat breakfast here in the morning. don't do that. seriously. don't. no can do.
This wonderful kerfuffle is a perfect representation of Portland and their love for the alcohol. You will rarely spend more than $30 on your future hangover.
This is not a place for the weak of heart, soul, stomach, or liver. This is a place where men are men and children remained leashed up outside. You will most definitely come across a fellow or two that are so pale that you will certainly assume they are vegan...or albino. Hell, they might even be dead, but all you have to do to check is turn on the perfectly capable jukebox to see if they start moving to the hardcore beats of the Postal Service.
If you don't like to drink, remain outdoors. This is not a place to invite Grandma Priscilla to for a nice petit a four. This is whiskey, this is smoke, punk rock, tattoos and grit all rolled into one lovely evening. Are you one that enjoys fruity drinks? Then stay far, far away my friend...as you will most certainly hear the complaining from the assertive customers in the line behind you...most likely they will be slurring about how they can't believe that you won't just order a shot of whiskey....go to Aura for your 3 part blended drinks, my friend.
All in all, one of the best/dirtiest/grittiest bars in town. Oh, and if you're a Portlander, you should know that Elliot Smith used to scratch out his heroin-induced melodies on these very tables.
I went twice to this place on a brief trip to pdx, and the first night was chill, kinda quiet, nothing interesting.
The second night the bartender kicked me out for having an out of state ID. what the hell.
portland is beautiful, I wouldn't waste my time here.
My Father's Place is adequately given it's props for being a good place to eat. But I think the fact it's a legit hangout spot is sometimes overlooked. They've got pool tables, video lottery, pinball, some deer hunting game, and with the help of the bar tender, a remote to the big screen in the back.
The food is damn good for how inexpensive it is. The drinks are strong and relatively cheap, too.
If I lived close to MFP, it'd definately be my Sun-Thurs hangout at least.
My Father's Place:
Cheap. Smoky. Greasy. Filthy. I love to hate this place. Will I be back there again? Almost certainly. Damn it.
I bet this place is better at night when getting smashed, but I went here sober for breakfast. It took 20 minutes to get my order taken even though I was at the counter. And my food wasn't even that good, either. Maybe it was an off day, or I wasn't in the right mood for it.
Edit: Went back later in the day and it was a lot better, so I'm adding a star!
Adequate to tasty food. Full bar. Extended hours.
Pinball! I remember two games in good repair.
Somehow the whole is less than the sum of its parts, and I couldn't wait to get outside. I left credits on a pinball game...had to go. Might have been the smoke? The scary amount of dust-cicles on the kitsch? Dunno.
Cheap beer, pinball and the hunting game and pool! What more can you ask for.
Good breakfast and its super cheap so its pretty good place anytime of the day or night.
Um this place kind of reminds me of Dennys (with a jukebox). I don't know why. I didn't come. I mean...I didn't go for that long so maybe my first impression was just a mirror image of what I thought about when I was eating at Dennys last Friday. Again, I don't know.
Maybe it was the smell? I guess on the plus side...My Father's Place has gambling machines hidden in the back corner.
Let's just say this. Don't wear your nice clothes....and plan on having to take one shower for every hour you spend in here. That's all. I am sure the food, drinks, service is fine. It's great.
Yesterday I somehow managed to go to MFP's twice in one day. I feel really, really unclean.
I like MFP's. The food is decent, the bloody mary is decent, the service is decent, and the weird shit hanging off the ceiling is mildly interesting. One of my dining companions ordered something called a "chicken fry delight", which is a chickenfried steak atop hashbrowns, onions and peppers, 3 eggs, and I think maybe some sausage, all covered in gravy. I was kind of scared of it. They've got lots of food items along those lines - arterial sclerosis, staring up at you. That's a good thing, because if you're the sort of person who likes going places like MFP's, then you're probably the sort of person whose stomach requires something like that to soak up whatever you put in there last night.
The orange gun on Big Buck Hunter is super-janky. That is sucky. MFP's, fix your Buck gun, yeah?
I think being drunk is a requirement to get in here. Food wasn't really memorable, spent a portion of the meal looking for my phone which was on the ground, and will probably find myself stumbling back in here again because of greasy food. There was even a cab waiting for us outside.
So I took parents here for breakfast, because unlike myself, they still eat meat and had a craving for biscuits and gravy. I had heard that My Father's Place was good for cheap and greasy breakfast fixin's.
I just about gave them a heart attack. The smoke covered walls are not a sight that they are used to seeing in Portland.
Overall: not a place for parents, but I think it would be good after a night out.
Gross, smoky, cheap, crowded and loud. Don't ever change!
How I am able to drink myself into oblivion until 2:30 am, then wake up and eat off these same previously ash-strewn, beer-puddled tables the following morning is anybody's guess...best to just get a Bloody Mary and try not to think about it.
If you are in the mood for good service, good food, clean silverware and a smile. This is not the place for you. My Father's Place should only be attempted while drunk, high, or recovering from one of the previosuly listed conditions.
My most recent foray into this smoky and dingy Portland icon was on the morning after the 4th of July. Needless to say the place was packed with hungover people, a few still drunk from the night before, and a few just getting drunk to start their Saturday afternoon losing money on video crack. I, fortunately was a cross between hungover and starting to get drunk. We started at the bar as there were no tables to be found, and ordered a round. The deluxe bloody mary is cheap and tasty. After a few minutes and scoping out an almost-available table, we sat down. The leftover food stayed on the table for at least 20 minutes while 3 cigarettes from the previous inhabitants still smoked in the ashtray. After waiting entirely too long for any sort of service, a coveted golden booth opened up and we scooted over to it. The service wasn't very quick in this location either, but at least we had service! My eggs benedict was surprisingly decent, and the hash browns were crisp and greasty!
I won't recount all of the unsavory details of the rest of my visit because it would take entirely too long. But as I emerged back into the daylight of Grand Avenue, I was satisfied once again with My Father's Place. It hits the hangover and greasy spoon factor every time. And, the people watching ain't too bad either.
Where else can you order a French Toast "Sandwich" and get huge slabs of delicious french toast, eggs, coffee, bacon, sausage, and oatmeal for 3.50? Yeah, that's right. At MFP you can. Any other place in the world, a side of eggs would cost that much, but not here. If you don't mind a bit dirty kind of feel from blinds that have never been dusted since they were put up and the smoke lurking in the air, this is the place to go.
When I have to explain to people why I long to be back in the Northwest, what I mean to say is, I miss My Father's Place. This was the first place I ever went in Portland, literally, and the good memories began then. It's such a fabulous dive-esque place to crowd in with a group of folks and get good and tipsy and muscle your way onto a pinball machine. Drinks are poured by an ever-heavy hand, and it seems like no matter how many cocktails, PBR's, or biscuits and gravy you order, the chex always low. Also a fun people watching spot on weekend mornings... all those tired-partied-late faces, awaiting a plate of classic American, truck-stop style food... I wish I was there. I'll be back one day... til then, I remember you fondly.
Not that into my father's place
I really wanted to like this place since I'm always on the lookout for a good neighborhood pub, but it was pretty much just a cheap, smoky place with typical pub fare. It does sport some fun pinball machines that you'd be hard pressed to find anywhere else, but I just wasn't feeling it. There's a lot of other great neighborhood haunts that offer a better atmosphere. But the drinks were stiff, so if that's your thing than maybe you'd like it more than I did.
I love eating pork chops here. And open face turkey sandwiches. It's good for other stuff too (like drinking). This place is perfect for what it is.
The epitome of Portland dive bars, My Father's Place is one of the stinkiest, smokiest, darkest, and dankest bars our fine city has to offer. And we love it! Some of the strongest and cheapest drinks around, My Father's Place is best braved late at night. The bartenders and staff are eccentric and curt (yet completely enduring), and the patrons range from young hipsters to old, peculiar barflies. Including pool tables, video games, and video poker, My Father's Place has something to offer everyone (with no real standards).
