Dunes

 

6

17

Ann D.

Portland, OR

How the hell is this place still open???

Pretentious in every sense of the word, this coke bar is poorly run and downright ridiculous.  When it first opened I heard people talking about how is was so cool and underground, it didn't even have a sign outside.  Wow, I'm impressed.  The first time I went here to see a co-worker's band, I walked in on two (underage) girls in the bathroom snorting coke.

The last, and final time I was in there, we had been drinking vodka and beer and had planned to continue with one or the other, but no.  There were upsidedown cups on all of the beer taps, and the bartender informed us that they had no beer.  When we tried ordering a vodka drink, he let us know that their specials were rum and tequilla (meaning, that was all they had in the bar).  Come on people, take the straw outta your nose.  The 80's are over.

Don't waste your time in this place.

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Elite '08

114

202

Lauren G.

Portland, OR

Oh, I like little Dunesies. This signless little club, recognizable only by its awning, has played host to many a killer show and dj night.  Perhaps it can be a little sceney (okay, a lot sceney) but it depends on who you're seeing, clearly, and other nights it's super chill and small and dark and pleasant.  They redid the inside not too long ago and it's looking quite seemly inside.  Craziness tends to go down and I kinda delight in the uncertainty.

Once while here a tall man offered to sell me coke from a baggie he was storing inside his mouth. I declined.

This review is brought to you by someone who is fairly certain she isn't a coked out hipster. Form your own opinions as you see fit.

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Elite '08

34

177

shane e.

Portland, OR

Overpriced hipster hangout where people go to be seen. The fact that they've even got a "password" for certain nights is ridiculously pretentious. What, did mommy not let you build the clubhouse you wanted as a child? Come on.

Expensive, pretentious, fashionista cocaine party.

2 stars for occasionally hosting cool out-of-town musicians.

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Elite '08

94

387

Quinn E.

Jamaica Plain, MA

Ew.
Sometimes people ask me why I left Portland. I wish I had videotaped my night at Suicide Club because nothing explains it better than that. Shittastic gin and tonic for $7 (I'm not cheap, I have no problem paying $9 for a good drink at Crush or Holocene or anyplace on the east coast) from the smugliest bartender ever. Who fit in perfectly with the 60 pound hipsters in pants that seemed to be spraypainted onto their skeletal bodies. I guess a steady diet of cocaine and Lucky Strikes will do that. Speaking of Lucky Strikes, I think I smoked two cartons that night, despite being a nonsmoker. I can handle a smoky club but not without some good drinks and company to cushion the blow to my respiratory system. A club full of smugly (smug+ugly) pretentious pricks, horrible drinks and not even good music? No thanks. It really *was* like an awful junior high dance, but even less comfortable if you can imagine that. If junior high had a sex offender older brother with scabies and a meth addiction, it would be called Suicide Club.

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41

38

erik h.

San Francisco, CA

Dude this place used to be so much cooler.

To be a bit more specific, in 2003 you could come here and see a fairly well known artist (say, Six Organs of Admittance) for free with 20 other people, which is about the comfortable capacity of the room.  The last time I was there, the place was packed to the point of being nearly unable to move, the talking completely drowned out the music, and the mood was about as enjoyable as a junior high dance where everyone was awkwardly scoping out everyone else.  No fun at all.

Still, I guess it all depends on the night.

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