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Admiral Theatre
Categories: Nightlife Dance Clubs Nightlife Adult Entertainment Dance Clubs, Adult Entertainment [Edit]
3940 W Lawrence Ave(between Harding Ave & Pulaski Rd)
Chicago, IL 60625
Neighborhood: Albany Park
(773) 478-8263
- Hours:
Mon-Sun 7 pm - 6 am
- Music:
- DJ
- Accepts Credit Cards:
- Yes
- Parking:
- Street, Valet
- Good for Groups:
- Yes
- Outdoor Seating:
- No
- Price Range:
-
$$$
- Best Nights:
- Fri, Sun, Sat
- Happy Hour:
- No
- Alcohol:
- No
- Smoking:
- No
- Coat Check:
- Yes
- Noise Level:
- Average
- Good For Dancing:
- Yes
- Ages Allowed:
- 18+
- Ambience:
- Classy, Upscale
- Has TV:
- Yes
- Wheelchair Accessible:
- Yes
51 reviews for Admiral Theatre
Review Highlights
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"I am not a frequent visitor to strip clubs or "juice bars." In 19 reviews -
"...like they're just having a great time dancing, which to me..." In 4 reviews -
"As far as performance on stage, they totally rocked it..." In 13 reviews
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51 reviews in English
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Review from Katt C.
Buffalo Grove, IL
12/3/2011
Came in here with my boyfriend the other day. First time in a strip club. Really nice variety of women. The girls that approached us were very sweet. Audrey and Mini were great dancers on stage. Had a private 3 song dance with Serenity. She danced mainly for me but my boyfriend REALLY enjoyed it! Dance was much more elaborate in private. Great prices and nice atmosphere. No alcohol unfortunately, but hey at least the girls weren't wasted and sloppy! don't normally do strip clubs, but if I had to come to one again id for sure come back to the admiral!
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Review from Jennifer M.
Portage Park, Chicago, IL
1/5/2012
I should have left it as a one night stand. Its mystique diminishes with each visit. My boyfriend and I normally go to this type of place once a year; we've been coming here once a week since NOV 2011.
The girls are nice enough. They are definitely strippers without any real talent. Hence, no dance pole on the floor. Still, my boyfriend and I find it most entertaining to sit by the stage and lay out 5 singles.
The full nudity is what differentiates this place from any other in the Chicago area that I'm aware of.
The last time we visited, it was just after we rang in 2012. We didn't stay long. I was accused of being a buzz kill with my blatant discontent for being there.
Pre-party is essential. They do not serve alcohol and this is not a BYOB establishment. There is a bar adjacent to the club. You're allowed to come and go but you must leave your drink at the door.
There is a 2 drink minimum of water and kid beverages. Do not give the cocktail server large bills when you pay for your drinks. She will purposely short change you and blame it on poor lighting when you call her out.
Nothing is for free at a strip club so the guy who is surprised to be charged for a neck massage is a complete idiot. Just like any night club in the city (dance and gentleman), the prices are steep. It's suppose to keep the cheap and undesireables out but that's all they seem to attract.
NOTABLE MENTION: This just happens to be my 69th review! -
Review from Dominic R.
Chicago, IL
12/2/2011
Horrible...........horrible........horrible. Went here for years back in the day!
How can we quickly sum this place up? Over Priced to get in..........2 NON alcoholic drink minimum. Girls aren't that hot.
I was sitting there just relaxing when a girl comes up to talk going "you like neck massages?". I'm like "sure". Then after wards she stops and goes "$20". I laughed and said "no way". She calls some guy over and I explained I wasn't paying for a NECK massage when she started doing it on her own. After a few words, the guy backed off me.
You want a LAP dance? The girls can't even sit on your lap and you can't touch them. Um, what kind of dance is that? Can they get any FARTHER away? It's a lap dance, NOT "Stand 10 feet away and watch you fake strip" Oh yeah that's turning me on when you are 10 feet away baby!!!! And the songs are like maybe 2 minutes long? $20 for that?? beware!
Then again, you see your typical stripper guys shelling out money left and right. you know, the dirty/creepy or fat disgusting guys who actually think the girls want them. um, sure buddy! they just want your money you losers!
Only reason we came here is cause my friend from out of town wanted to check it out. I agreed to go back with him, and won't be going back for a very long time.
Heavenly bodies is where it's at boys!!! -
Review from danielle r.
Chicago, IL
10/27/2011
To the ones that gave this place a 5 star:come on you must be blind if you consider these girls sexy! lol are you serious????
Ok about this place...UGHHH where do i start! i was just there last week with my friend and first off: DISCUSTING and not because the girls were nude but because they were ALL ugly!! so skinny that you could see their rib cage! makeup not done right, hair NOT DONE, poor outfit selection. They have a nerve to charge girls$20???to get in? we were the best looking ones in there and they were so intimidated by us that no one would even come close to us!( WHICH IM GLAD THEY DIDN'T LOL)
Now, you expect WOW when you go to places like this right?
ha ha ha NOT! ! All the girl look like they are 14 years old!!! 16 at the most! i am not joking! seriously people! WHO DOES THE HIRING THERE?? i was so discusted that we left shortly after30 min! WHAT A WASTE OF MONEY!!!!!!!!!
There was some old woman in there asking people if they want a neck massage,she looked like something was wrong with her posture and her face was quite washed up from many years of partying kinda face you know what i mean .now who will wanna get a neck massage from girls like that?
there was a spanish girl with her nipples pierced, she did not throw any smiles almost seemed confused on that pole,and her slow motion dance was more then anoying since she paused for most of the time and just looked around as if she was looking for something lol
Ok a note to management: PLEASE DONT HIRE LITTLE GIRLS,WITH NO CHEST,NO BUTT,NO HIPS,NO TAN, HAIR AND MAKEUP DONE. FOR GOD'S SAKE! i will never go back there and tell al my friends what bull this place is
come on this is more then ridicoulous, and to the stripers there: you guys can make more money bartending lol
WOOWW
oh ,oh i forgat! AND LADIES PLEASE GET A BOOB JOB ! I MEAN SERIOUSLY WHAT WAS THAT??? FLATTTT AND VERY DISTURBING!
AS A FEMALE HOW CAN YOU EVEN PUT THAT IN SOMEONES FACE? COME ON NOW.. -
Review from Matt M.
9/22/2011
Been here twice. Once for high school graduation 10 years ago, and now I went back for a bachelor party.
The quality of the inside is a bit higher than the other strip clubs in the area. I don't "frequent" these establishments except on such occassions. I do have to say that I was pleasantly surprised at the lack of an environment of eminent stabbing.
Big downsides is a steep entry fee. No breaks except for the bachelor.
They are uber aggressive as they are at any strip club.
Quick tip: VIP just doubles your price and does not else for you - skip it. -
Review from Brad B.
Chicago, IL
1/25/2012
Worst strip club ever.
If you have a bachelor party DO NOT GO HERE! We arrived with 10 guys for a bachelor party--something you'd think a dead strip club would welcome with open arms. Unlike most clubs, the only deal they offered was no admission fee for the bachelor. This is cruddy. Then, when a couple of guys were outside having a cigarette before enterring, they decided that we weren't all enterring together and that deal did not apply. I argued this point vigorously and was asked to leave before even getting in. The stupid "sales associate" insisted we all pay the cover charge and really gave everyone a bad taste in their mouth. LIke I said, if I was the owner of a strip club that was dead on a Saturday night, I would go out of my way to get a 10 person bachelor party in the door, not give them a hard time.
The reports I had from my friends who actually did go in said the girls were fairly unimpressive as well.
This place sucks. The people suck. You can't drink. The girls are not attractive. Sounds like a real winner, right? -
Review from Camille B.
Forest Park, IL
2/22/2011
My first time at a strip club and I just had to go to the Admiral. I only went because some friends of mine were participating in the amateur competition and I wanted to cheer them on. And the promise of boobs helped seal the deal pretty quickly.
H'oboy. Where do I start with this place? I guess what bugged me most was the nearly lethargic motions that somehow managed to pass for dancing here. And I mean, I can appreciate mood lighting but I would at least like to SEE what I'm paying $5 a soda for. Sure, the girls were friendly and fun to talk to but I didn't pay an entry fee just to chat about whatever bullcrap college you're working to pay for.
Now you want to go somewhere that's worth the cash? Polekatz in Bridgeview. Nuff said, man. Nuff said. -
Review from Jackeline P.
Biloxi, MS
4/17/2012
I sent my husband and brother out on a guys night out and since my brother isn't 21 yet, Admiral was their only option. We read the bad reviews but my men hoped that it would be a good night since they were going with a group. They were dead wrong! The ladies are not talented, not pretty, and are total B*TCHES! First of all the website said something about there being a $15 cover... NOPE, its $25 oh and the $10 lap dances is actually $30! Maybe someone should update their damn website, this is false advertisement. My husband came home mad about the night, the lap dances are expensive and are very disappointing. At one point one of the strippers was trying to kick their group out of the club alleging that my brother threw water at her which never happened (what really happened was that the stripper got upset that she was turned down by my brother who is a good looking man so she wanted them kicked out). Since this club is 18 and up, they don't serve alcohol and there is a 2 drink limit... WTF!? DO NOT COME HERE! Just wait to be 21 and go to a REAL gentlemen's club.
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Review from Charles J.
Oswego, IL
11/12/2010
Admiral gets only two stars from me. Not because it was so terrible but because it never came close to the hype I had for it. Some of that hype was from other people (not Admiral's fault, I know) but some of it came from the anticipation you get upon arrival only to be disappointed after you've been there 30 minutes or so.
Maybe I need to give the place another chance but I guess I could name quite a few places I could have at least as good a time and spend less AND at least get a little bit of a buzz.
Bottom line... there are better places to get a better bang for your buck.Listed in: Adults Only
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Review from Manny Q.
Chicago, IL
10/20/2010
This place wasnt as hyped up as they make it on the radio. I went there last night for zombie stripping night and I set my expectations far up. There was a few girls dressed up as zombies and what not. There was 1 girl who got really defensive when we denied her services. She came off as very arrogant and overly cocky especially for some one that wasnt that great looking.
The security were meh, very anal! -
Review from Kevin C.
Chicago, IL
4/14/2011
Let me first say that I am not a connoisseur but this place is fairly lame. The layout of the stage is fairly interesting in that is small so not alot of people can sit at the stage and help generate revenue for the place and they don't serve alcohol. There is a good reason why they don't serve alcohol but you will have to go yourself to find out.
I ended up here for a bachelor party and to be completely honest, would not go here again on my free will. -
Review from Michael G.
Rockville, MD
10/12/2009 1 photo
A night at this strip club is almost guaranteed to be legend...
Wait for it...
Legend...
Wait for it...
Oh, hell, I can't ruin that joke with anything short of the truth...
Average.
Just what is legendaverage? Is that even a word? It is now. There is no better way to describe the Admiral Theater. A night there will produce stories as any club with nude dancers will. But are they going to be life shaping, high fiving tales of debauchery? Not at all. A trip here will probably end up being an average night out - but with boobs (which for some guys, not me unfortunately, is actually an average night).
This is mostly because this club is totally nude and, therefore, there's no alcohol allowed. At $6, the sodas, coffees, red bulls and juices are not outragously priced but it's really easy to lose a buzz in this place and not end up getting crazy. Unless a sugar high gets you loopy. That is, if you're even old enough to have a buzz in the first place. When me and my two companions rolled up, we were instantly the oldest people in the club. It seemed to be filled with bachelor parties for 19 year olds.
This is definitely a strip club with training wheels. Now I like non-threatening over seedy so I prefer a club like this but I know it's not everyone's cup of tea. The ticket sellers and doormen here were, get this, actually friendly instead of acting like they'd rather break our necks than welcome us inside (as is the case with a lot of other clubs). That was a welcome change. Or maybe it was just because they thought we were harmless in comparison to the drunken 21 year olds (and at least we were compared to the future groom who was dragged up on stage and showed the entire club his unwaxen ass).
I do have to give all the ladies working credit for perseverance if not "god-given" (though the lack of silicon here is refreshing) or dancing talent. If these are the kind of dancers that are working their way through college, I hope it's business school because they have a great future in sales. High pressure sales though. They all shake hands and introduce themselves land tell you a bit of their life story like they're applying for an office job. And the flow of them is non-stop. There's barely a moment to breathe inbetween requests to purchase a dance, a "drink," or something else.
However, one or two of these solicitations might actually be worthwhile as there are girls there who give people $10 shoulder and neck massages. That might be worth going back for as none of us had the courage (or just funds) to actually get one this time.
That is, the next time I'm up for a legend...average night at least!Listed in: Greatest Hits, The Real Northwest Side
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Review from Mara A.
Chicago, IL
9/28/2009
Yes, thats right boys, I'm a female going to a strip club to watch. Hot, i know.
I found coupons online for free cover, so myself and 5 others headed over to the Admiral for a birthday night. Walked right in, got front row seats and ordered our 2 drink min. Yum, diet coke.
Watched some classy ladies show their stuff, gave a few bucks and called it a night.
God i love boobs. :) -
Review from isaac c.
Chicago, IL
9/26/2009
My friend from Japan was visiting, and well, what other options did I have? LOOK AT THE BEAN? HA. It was time to get some titties in our faces.
We took the front row of the stage, armed with gangsta rolls of dollar bills and the perversion that can only develop in asian businessmen like us. We had a great time, and the girls were very receptive, and even entertained some of our requests:
Me: I will give you a dollar bill if you lick your own titty.
The stripper licked her own titty. On the main stage. The crowd went wild. My friend from Japan yells, "I LOVE AMERICA!!!!!"
Stripper, eyeing the dollar bill in my hand: If I lick my other nipple, will you give me that other dollar?
Me: Yes, yes I will.
God I love this place.
One tip: They do not serve alcohol, but do not despair even if you did not have the foresight to travel with liquor in your trunk. There is a seedy liquor store down the street that has a back room bar. It is absolutely AWESOME. $2 shots and beers. The selection is limited, but you're pre-gaming for a titty bar. I don't think class is an issue at this point, so drink whatever swill they drop in front of you.
As a side note, I can't believe there are people here disparaging this place for the very nature of what a titty bar is. Don't go to a titty bar looking for dignity and respect. ITS A TITTY BAR WHAT THE HELL DID YOU EXPECT TO FIND? Idiots. -
Review from leyla a.
Chicago, IL
4/19/2008
They serve breakfast!
I've been to The Admiral several times and I when I am in the mood for fully nude, I make the trip. Usually after sitting around on a Saturday night drinking several bud lights, out come the Tequilla shots - next we find ourselves as a nudy bar. My old haunt used to be VIPs but after they started wearing granny panties and weird, giant things on their nipples, we stopped going.
I've seen several adult film stars at the Admiral - including Chasey Lane and Pandora Peaks (she was in Striptease, not sure about porn). I am going to see that midget in May and I can't wait to see a burlesque show.
I like the private booths, they are very naughty. More than one of male friends have taken the girls home in the past and that is a fact (for free, they didn't have to pay for their after work services). The girls are usually pretty friendly.
Most of all, I like the fact that it is an old theater and they have comfy seating. I also like that they have feature dancers that come through.
And for that woman Annie who wrote a review because she used to drive by with her MOM yet has never been inside. Why would you bother writing a review? Something says to me, you're dying to know and I am sure it is for naughty reasons. -
Review from David N.
8/11/2011 1 Check-in Here
It's a strip club. 18+ welcome, full nude, $10 table lap dances, $15 for ATM.
Listed in: Chicago: Tour Guide
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Review from Mesum N.
Chicago, IL
1/14/2009
How could you run a titty bar with strippers without titties?
Not acceptible. -
Review from Nicole L.
5/13/2010
I'm in love with a stripper!
I had to, I just had to... Well the moment I turned 18 I had to try Admiral on like a new pair of stilettos.
This place is a complete dump and really looks like a hole in the wall.
I had a great time due to the fact I went with two of x girl best friends and my current guy friend. One of them was shy and excited the other a pro and my guy friend a horn ball. Needless to say I made it rain.
I'm sure I just paid a months rent plus dinner for those ladies.
I must of got lucky because I was eyeing a little honey with tattoo's, dread's and piercings.
Can you say DADADAMN. I was in love so I had a girl bring her to me and give a few lap dances.
Note: On the night I wore a tight leopard print dress and 6 in heels with no lingerie so I could not do what the boys do and spread their legs for the ladies.
Well this hot little lady tells me to hold my hands in the air so I wouldn't touch her and get kicked out, I went to pay her for 3 dances but she wouldn't take it -- Yes I was shocked!
As she parts my legs I warn her she'll see more than a tattoo down there and doesn't bother her, I ask why well turns out she's bi. Holler.
All this touching to me and she starts biting my neck.
By this time everyone stopped watching the stage and started watching us, one guy flipped on his chair trying to lean back and watch and sure enough the whole room started laughing. But wait there's more!
Give me a kiss to build a dream on?
Yes she kissed me nearly starting a riot from the men. If it wasn't for the 28 yr old Bi bombshell I'm sure the out come wouldn't of been fun. So 2 stars for the dangerously sexy lady.
P.S. The ladies are not visually the most up kept women, the hiring staff could do better.
First and last time at Admiral. Thank you and have a goodnight. -
Review from Niki C.
Chicago, IL
7/19/2006
I am not a frequent visitor to strip clubs or "juice bars." However, I took a down-on-his-luck buddy of mine here once to cheer him up.
Apparently, there isn't a weight requirement. Not that there should be, but it's full nudity. Ick.
Apparently, they are recruiting women. At least they tried to recruit me. No thanks.
Apparently, one cannot, in fact, use a "homie" figurine to pay the cover charge, as we quickly found out.
Ick.
Ick.
Ick.Listed in: Judge Ye On Yer Patrons, Places I Wouldn't Wish On My…
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Review from Aaron S.
11/8/2008
Well I'm giving this place a 4-star review, though it's based on my one time visiting here and it was for a birthday 6 years ago. I'm sure the place has changed immensely since I was there, but I have faith that the place itself couldn't have plummeted that far downhill since then. Of course, I could be wrong.
Regarding the cover, when I went there it was $20 cover for a Tuesday night, and they did have printable coupons for half-price admission. Which meant an extra lap dance. Yea, lap dances were $10 a pop here back when I visited. I have no clue what they are now, but I'd heard things about stripclubs and I felt $10 was a fair price for a lap dance lasting one song's duration. Just make sure to grab one as soon as the song starts and you're golden.
Yea, my headline of "I always get my money's worth when it comes to food" doesn't just apply to food...
For a Tuesday, the place wasn't very crowded, so prime seats up at the main stage were always available. Some of the patrons looked like "creepy regulars" though, but my friend and I had a blast sitting there at the main stage throwing money in front of each other exchanging "YOU'RE A GREAT FRIEND" sentiments. I recall we made several strippers laugh. Which is probably better than making strippers cry - no matter what the Bloodhound Gang would have you think.
The night got interesting when they announced some kind of T-Shirt Extravaganza or something (I don't remember the cheesy name, just how awesome it was). The ladies were walking around wearing these T-shirts (or had them tied around their waists) and for $25 you got the T-shirt and three dances. Mathematically, I couldn't pass up that value.
Her name was Lyza (stage name, I'm sure) and after the three dances, I wound up getting a quick private session with her (not the insanely-priced half-hour or hour packages costing upwards of $300). There really wasn't much difference between the lap dances on the floor and in the private booth, but it was more private and we could hear each other better.
In an odd twist of fate, I'd brought a Sharpie with me in odd hopes that I'd get a stripper's phone number (can you tell I'm a socially-awkward nerd with little grasp of reality?) and instead it went to getting Lyza to sign the T-shirt she gave me. After all, there's little else a fat man like me can do with a Medium-sized T-shirt from a stripclub - so I turned it into a nice souvenir.
Of course, the better souvenirs came from their little "gift shop" where I got an interesting DVD and a nice toy for myself.
All in all, I wound up dropping $140 in four hours at my first time at a stripclub. I felt I got a good deal. I had a great time. I got some great merchandise. I'm sad now that it's been 6 years and I've never made it back there, but maybe someday I'll convince my girlfriend to take a trip up there with me.
Or I'll get invited to an awesome bachelor party. Any guys getting married and needing some more male friends? -
Review from Count Gregula ..
Chicago, IL
3/28/2007
The average age of the clientele is at least 100, you might get run over by a valker...Vait a minute! This sounds like the same patrons at What's Cooking Inc, or at least they are in the afternoon vhen it is discount day and you can use a half off coupon as vell (from vhat I hear).
Hmm...nude girls, but no booze. Vith the easy access of adult sites these days vhy bother going there. *clears throat* Now, excuse me vhile I log out of Yelp for a few...
VHAT??
I'm just going for a snack...Shame on you! -
Review from Kristen W.
Chicago, IL
4/27/2006
The Admiral is a huge ripoff. Cover is expensive and there is no booze. WTF?
The announcer/DJ guy is TOO loud and absolutely unintelligible....I'm embarassed for them.
The place has a dirty truckstop sort of feel. Like you don't want to touch the walls or seats. There are tons of girls for your viewing pleasure but after about 5 minutes with no booze, it's time to hit the door. -
Review from Elaine C.
Chicago, IL
9/28/2009
We were standing on the street in Wrigleyville, it was getting late, drinks were had. The Admiral billboard-car goes by.
Me: I've never been to the Admiral.
Friend: I'll pay the cab fair if you go with me.
Me: ...ok.
20 minutes later, boobs.
I guess there's no booze when its full nudity, which sucks because nothing goes better with boobs than booze. But other than that, it was a typical strip club experience. The admission was half price after 2am. The place is an old theatre which is kind of cool. I did very much enjoy the gentlemanly bouncers. I wish they were in my posse and just hung around me whenever someone started trouble. I think they made the place no-nonsense classy.
(Did I just review a strip club and talk about the dude bouncers? I'd make a terrible lesbian.)Listed in: rants that rofl
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Review from Bianca J.
Chicago, IL
8/14/2008
I haven't been in here, except to apply for a job as a waitress, and they never called me back. I'm more of strip club with a tipping rail kinda gal and they charge a $20 cover so I've never gone inside despite it being in my neighborhood.
My friend A., who writes for the London Review of Breakfast, wanted to write a review on a Chicago breakfast place and was nixing my suggestions of Cafe Lula and the Bongo Room (where we wound up going anyway). We saw an ad in The Onion advertising free breakfast at the Admiral and we decided that there is nothing that Londoners could possibly enjoy more than a review of sketchy breakfast at a Chicago strip club. Titties and eggs! So we call the Admiral: "Oh, we don't do that anymore."
THEN STOP ADVERTISING IT WHYDONCHA!
Next thing you know you'll go in there and there won't be any nude girls, either. -
Review from Kevin C.
5/19/2010
We rolled about 15 deep for a bachelor party expecting a table near the main stage. They didn't even know we made reservations, which we did, so took an extra 20 minutes to get in...all the while our buzzes were slowly depleting.
We had to sit in VIP to accommodate our size which just meant more cash for lap dances, boo. Coming with a group is a plus which resulted in half off the cover coming to 12.50 a pop. There is one main stage and two single stages on each side.
The quick list:
- NO BOOZE hence the full nudey
- $6 mixers and one drink minimum (Pepsi, Red Bull, etc.)
- $20 dances in VIP, $10 for regular seats
- Private dances start at $75
- Good talent
- Fairly laid back and respectful security
- Bar for drinks two doors down
The entertainment was for the bachelor so it was a bit tough keeping everyone occupied sitting so far away from the stage. No individual attention or making it rain on stage like a Lil' Wayne music video.
Once we realized we needed to replenish the booze hound in all of us about half the group headed to the bar two doors down. They have no problem with patrons coming in and out of the place as long as you have your hand stamped (and not completely wasted). Eventually we regrouped there and the majority departed.
Round two. Right up at the stage. This was definitely more fun for and originally what we were looking for. The bachelor needed to know just what he might be missing after taking the plunge. Oh and $60 to get the bachelor on stage and embarrass the hell out of him. This is what I envisioned and wish we would have arrived earlier.
Things to consider:
- Group size
- Booze or no booze?
- Time of arrival
- Reservations
Overall Admiral Theatre was sufficient but by no means above average for this special occasion. Call around and see what deals you can get because a large enough group gives you some negotiating power. -
Review from Stephanie y.
Chicago, IL
9/5/2008
Fun times.
The girls smelled pretty, and made me and my friends laugh. Probably because it was 3 girls. And we sat on the stage.
-1 star for charging $6 for a damn cup of sprite. I should get free refills. -
Review from J J.
Chicago, IL
6/15/2009
Walked in with a white shirt... walked out brown. The girl that rubbed on me for 30 minutes trying to get me to buy a private dance seemed more pale when she walked away... probably beacause I had her tan on my shirt. -1 star instantly
-1 star for charging $6 for a coke and no refills
-1 star for girls being pushy and having no tact in their sales pitch. Simply put they came of as cheap hookers.
I only give it 2 stars because the guys I was with seemed to have a blast. Eh... maybe it just wasn't my night for fun at The Admiral. I'll never know as I don't plan to return. -
Review from Matthew A.
Chicago, IL
8/28/2006
Fully nude does not make this place worth going to. I would much rather be able to drink than get a 2 second peak at a girl's lower half. That being said, the staff does treat you a little better than most places and the girls dance a little better on the poles. There seems to be fewer "imported" girls (al la Eastern Europe) than at some other places.
Would not recommend making a special trip unless you are already in the neighborhood, or unless alcohol is not your thing. -
Review from Joe R.
Chicago, IL
8/21/2008
Back in the day, this theatre showed the best in X rated films (back in the day when X rated films were really films). Now it's a cheap, sleazy strip club and the original theatre seats have been replaced with tables.
Not even worth visiting for historical purposes as much of the original decorations have been removed.
A shame... -
Review from Geovanny N.
Chicago, IL
12/21/2007
I have been to a couple of Adult Shows in my life and I have to say that compare to those past experiences The Admiral did not match up. The girls were all right but not worth the cover charge. The drinks are horrible and not worth the money. And don't let me get started at the so call valet parking.
My recommendstion is to not even bother with this place. -
Review from Phillie P.
Chicago, IL
1/23/2008
Did I mention I bought a large inflatable penis there? Fun at underground parties I tell you. There's nothing like a hot girl going, "Damn... you have a large penis".
For that it gets 4 stars.
I s'pose that the girlie review is much better than he movie house it once was. -
Review from Virginia T.
Chicago, IL
10/30/2007
It's not too far, and not too scary, so I ended up there once. It was meh. That's all.
Most of the girls were small in every sense of the word, not anywhere near what I find attractive. They were more into chatting and bonding with us because a few of us were female. Which was OK but a bit strange-especially since we were all there in a group, and seemed even weirder when they started trying to convince us to come out to "amateur" night. Ick. It seemed outrageously expensive (parking, cover, min. # drinks *not even alcoholic b/c it's full nudity*, and lapdances ($15+)).
Not worth it. Go to a burlesque show instead.Listed in: Sexy Chicago
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Review from Victor L.
4/16/2010
As a result of an unplanned Birth Day Bash I ended up here again for my Birth Day.
Well I'm not a big fan of Strip Joints (on regular basis) but, I'm down for when its a Friends or My Birth Day. Its usually a $20 cover but, it depends on the night's event (such as Wednesday 1/2 off) the staff is cool and the bouncers are polite.
The only bad thing is there is a "$6 mandatory drink purchase" (Nonalcoholic)
Overall, Its a Strip Joint filled with Extremely Gorgeous Ladies, with some celebrities lookalikes (such as Katy Perry) and great place to spend a couple of bucks on a special occasion. -
Review from Jabbara P.
Chicago, IL
5/17/2011 1 Check-in Here
This was fun when I was 18. The light is super bad.
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Review from Bev h.
Chicago, IL
10/12/2009
being a lady at a female strip club usually means that you're allowed to get a bit naughtier with the entertainment than the boys are.... not so at the admiral. i tried to put a dollar in the g-string of the chick giving me a lapdance, and she was like, "you're really not allowed to do that, but i'll let it slide." uh, sorry- where am i supposed to put your tips?
fellow t & a connoisseur michael g. got us in for free, we got a table on the main floor, and the "fun" began. $6 for all mixers, no booze allowed. lame. for the amount of actual vulvas i saw (and really didn't need to see), i would prefer it if i could have a drink or 5 and the girls kept their panties on.
saw some ok looking girls, but the dancing was pretty lackluster- on the mainstage and 2 side stages. the girls who come around hawking lapdances have clearly been coached on their routines. every 3-4 minutes, a girl will appear, introduce herself to each of us, ask our names, and shake our hands. way too formal, and just kinda weird. lapdances at your table are $10, but they don't touch you at all, and you have to be totally hands off. not really worth it- just go sit closer to the stage...
we left after a few mixers for the bar next door, and were reminded that the admiral is 18 and over when we saw some kid blowing chunks in the lobby on our way out. good times. -
Review from Brent C.
Chicago, IL
4/1/2011
Yep, its a strip club.
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Review from Jacob J.
11/25/2008
More than a decade ago The Admiral was worth the cost and the time. It was a different time then, it was a different Chicago, you could find women of all kinds. Ever since they became part of a chain (ownership from Vegas), it's been downhill.
This is the training bra of strip bars. Perfect for your 18 year old men that don't know shit about a true Gentleman's club experience. Being 18, you won't get to experience a better club till you travel or you turn 21.
No grinding, no lap dancing and no touching of any kind. "Air dances"; when one of their entertainers dances between your legs for the mere cost of $10 per song, at the most there's the faint touch of her leg against yours and for some guys, that's the whole shebang. If you're a moron that doesn't know better, she'll lead you to the VIP area where you get to sit five feet away from her and watch as she dances on a table in your own private booth, which people can see inside of. Not so private after all. You have the option of buying her a soft drink or energy drink. No champagne here, but you'd swear that you spent the money on it. Drinks are fucking expensive; expect to pay $6-8 dollars for a juice, soda or energy drink. No alcohol sales, here folks.
Getting back to that VIP dance you so stupidly walked over for, chances are the entertainer you walked away with has hardly any dance experience so now you're stuck in this booth with this young lady that will swerve around that little table a few times, licking her lips and trying her best to look sexy. For these three songs of more air dancing, you drop $65-$70 dollars. You look in your wallet to realize you've spent all your money on table dances and over priced drinks. What to do?
Either hit the ATM and pay 20% of the amount of money you pull(in entertainment fees) OR charge it on your credit card and pay some sort of strange luxury tax. Your choice. Don't forget that you also paid over $20 dollars in cover charge. If you were smart you may have looked online at http://admiralx.com and secured a discount coupon, otherwise you are an avid reader of the Chicago Sun-times and have already clipped a coupon out of the daily paper. However, I think the coupon is only printed one day per week. Still this cover charge is equivalent to the cover at Great America. Bet you'd have more fun at Six Flags. But, you are young and dumb. Please don't be a cheap ass, these ladies are strutting their stuff in heels and over worn clothing to get you to spend some money, at the very least tip them something! Some of them really are college students, ex- peace corp, ex-forces gals. I was forced to chaperone a client here recently on a weeknight no less. It was horrible. Less than six dancers working that night. Tons of cheap asses not willing to tip the ladies on stage; at one point one of their (one and only)Vegas dancer came out on stage and yelled at the guys for not tipping, forcing them back to allow paying customers forward. She was seductive, blonde and very Vegas. Very different from the other dancers scheduled that evening. Admiral's got two or three poles in the main dancing area and no one ever tried using it. The skill of pole dancing has died, I honestly don't remember ever seeing a marvelous pole dancer at the Admiral. It was so bad and amateurish; the client was having a blast. He found the one raunchy stripper that discovered she was a girl. Like to guess where she was sticking her finger? Ugh.. So bored, I downed fruit punch, glass after glass. Can you imagine spending almost $25 dollars on Hawaiian Punch type of crap!? Definitely my last time in here.
Ladies that want to see what stripping is about and are too afraid to see the real deal, Admiral is great for that. Couples and young people that don't want to travel much and frankly are inexperienced, you check it out as well. When you're ballsy enough to try better check out http://www.stripclubli... (This link has nude content)
Well.. they do still offer special nights when popular porn stars come and perform (Erotic air dances with your fav porn star are double the regular prices - it's a waste)(When the porn star says "How would you like to spend the whole year with me? Just say no and walk away. She's not being serious, she's only hooking you into buying her calendar.), also on weeknights they have crazy offerings like nude pillow fighting. Sounds fun?Listed in: Chicago's Top Gentleman's…
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Review from Kristin L.
Chicago, IL
3/9/2006
True, I'm not exactly a connoisseur of Gentlemen's Clubs, but I can say that the Admiral is a thoroughly enjoyable club for men AND women. It's decently priced ($20 sun - wed and $25 thur - sat) and they have tons of printable coupons on their website for up to half price admission. The environment is clean and classy, the music is good, and (this is my favorite part) the girls are happy! They all look like they're just having a great time dancing, which to me makes it a really enjoyable show. This is a great place to celebrate a birthday, a promotion, or just to have a great night out with your friends!
Listed in: Entertainment
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Review from Mark S.
Chicago, IL
7/18/2006
Old guys I work with complain the Mayor Jane Byrne rewrote the laws to make it tougher on, and ultimately close down all the good nudie places. One visit to this overpriced cheesy place, and you'll believe 'em. Write your alderman and complain!
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Review from molly c.
1/25/2007
now i may not know much, but i do know that i found a $5 off (off what, i don't know) coupon for the admiral in a cab.
classy and sassy.
