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826 Valencia
Categories: Local Services Community Service/Non-Profit Education Special Education Community Service/Non-Profit, Special Education [Edit]
826 Valencia St(between 19th St & Cunningham Pl)
San Francisco, CA 94110
Neighborhood: Mission
(415) 642-5905
- Hours:
Mon-Sun 12 pm - 6 pm
- Accepts Credit Cards:
- Yes
271 reviews for 826 Valencia
271 reviews in English
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Review from Patricia M.
3/24/2012 1 photo
The best place in the world. An incredible pirate shop. Funny, amazing, crazy, nice people, kind atmosphere... I like the idea behind, the NOG that helps young writers to develop their skills. I'm an absolutely fan of them.
Great idea with the best implementation! -
Review from Luda M.
Rockville, MD
4/1/2012
This place will put a smile on your face. You do not need anything in the store, but when you enter you find yourself wishing you were a pirate so you could feel justified in purchasing pirate swag.
The books are funny and some of the merchandise are total gag toys, but it is just a fun place to go and check out.
If you do ever decide to become a pirate this place would be the place to go. -
Review from Nicole W.
2/2/2012
Just when I thought I was goin' t' run out of eye patches an' beard dye for me crew, a young bloke directed me towards th' Pirate Supply Store. I made me way 'bout town to Valencia after droppin' anchor in th' Bay.
This here is by far th' finest Pirate Shop in th' eastern Pacific, though I've seen better in th' north Indian Ocean- far more wenches n' citrus. But I acquired everythin' I needed fer me crew an' a new peg leg fer me first mate.
I spotted loads of scrolls an' parchment on the walls n' was afraid they were th' bounties for me head. Growin' up on th' high sea never granted me time t' read, but twas told they were guides for preventin' scurvy an' usin' lard. What scallywag doesn't grease their mast wit' lard? Have they got no sense?! Arrr!!
After many a fortnight battlin' th' British, twas good to rest me legs and hang me hook at th' fish theater. These beasts from th' briny deep be th' only entertainment a sea farer needs!
Keep yer wits about ya, lest ye get mopped! -
Review from Lorrie M.
1/30/2012 1 Check-in Here
How does anyone not give this place five stars? This is a PIRATE STORE! They even have a fish theater, and mind you, rules for the fish theater. Don't judge the fish please.
Everything in here can only be described as Awesome, Spectacular, Amazing, Cool, Great, and Fantastic. This is a total must visit not just if you're in the Mission District but if you're in the city of San Francisco in general. I have been hard pressed to find something like this existing in San Francisco and had no idea it was here all along! (I need to walk around more....)
The prices on here are ultra reasonable for the awesome, cool things you will find here to buy. It doesn't matter if you're not into pirates or speak in Arghh Matey tongues, you will be entertained, enthralled and enchanted by all that you find here. There's even a tub of lard, for all of your lard needs. Seriously, this place is a MUST. And if you MUST know, you can find some of the best sand in SF at 826 Valencia.
On a side note, they also have a fantastic back room educational area, for which I'm sure young pirates are certain to be born. HIGHLY. RECOMMENDED. -
Review from douglas B.
San Francisco, CA
3/27/2012
I am pretty sure if you don't give a Pirate shop that teaches kids five stars you are a huge jerk and you should not be allowed to enjoy pirate shops. This place is a blast tons of Pirate gear and fun games for kids as well. A true gem of a place!
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Review from Kim S.
3/11/2012
Ever imagine your bed was a pirate ship, a toy wand was your sword, and all your stuffed animals were your crew forced to fight alongside of you in search for booty and ale? No? Just me? Okay. Well, as an adult those days may be fewer, but if I ever get the urge to become captain of the high seas of my bedroom floor, I can collect all the necessities here. Blackbeard beard extensions? Check? Vintage compass? Check. Skull bracelets, mini treasure chests, and the guide to sea monsters? Check, check, and absolutely check. Good to know I can cover all the bases. And I can even take a minute away from deciding which villages to ransack to watch the fish at the fish theater. You truly must come here, whether you have ever had aspirations of being a pirate or not.
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Review from Amy L.
10/18/2011
Quite possibly the only store in San Francisco that truly fills me with childish delight!!! There are so many drawers full of nautical knick-knacks, endless cool, shiny things to see...this really IS a Pirate Supply Shop, but not in a Disney-store kind of way. There are glass eyeballs and "tattoo removal kits" (a file!!) and bottles in which to leave messages when one is marooned. There are humorous writings all over the place instructing one on the various appropriate ways to act when one is a pirate, such as how to swab the deck.
But this glorious space isn't just about inspiring your inner sailor to take to the high seas under the Jolly Roger...it's a front for tutoring children. And that makes me even happier to see here along the Valencia Corridor.
Kudos, 826 Valencia! Or should I say the uber-trite and yet still-delicious "Yo Ho!!" -
Review from R. G.
Los Angeles, CA
12/12/2011
One stop shopping for all your pirate needs, hands down the best pirate supply store I've ever visited! You'll learn the value of citrus and swabbing and may even get mopped in the process! See the three person theater, learn about uses for lard, open the drawers in back... just remember, no whistling!
A clever way to skirt the zoning laws while providing a terrific resource for kids in the City. Well done Sir! -
Review from Mayra L.
11/7/2011
The Pirate Store is one of those places I bring people to because I want them to know how awesome San Francisco is. I discovered it as a new transplant to the City years ago, stumbling along Valenica and I fell in love.
The front of the store is of course the "Pirate Store" and them have all these knick knacks for pirates like eye patches etc. There are drawers you can open and discover randoms objects inside that are essential pirate needs. You can even but a hook!
The back of the store is a classroom set up with a ton of tables and computers and books. They hold writing workshops for kids in which all the proceeds go to. The kids also get some of their writing published, which you can buy at the Pirate Side.
When they are there, the kids are hilarious. They're loud and running everywhere and know your there and they try getting your attention.
There's also an aquarime off the side with movie theatre seat in which you can sit down and watch the fish swim along.
The fact that they have this fun little shop which benefits the community is a large part of what keeps me coming here to buy knick knacks for friends and family.
Also..I really want to hook ;) -
Review from Valery C.
10/30/2011 2 photos
This review is for the Pirate Store, the visible part of 826 Valencia that supports a non-profit creative writing operation for children. Whoever was in charge of the Pirate Shop outdid themselves. The space is decked out floor to ceiling and wall to wall in wood, with goods crammed onto hooks, nooks & crannies, and asymmetrical drawers sporting entertaining descriptors that lure you into opening them to see what's inside. There's a decidedly uncommercial feel b/c the goods are really a random assortment without obvious price tags to break the illusion. In some ways, you feel like you're exploring a pirate ship more than shopping a theme store. And of course, stock up on pirate ship goodies and treasures like silverware, gold coins, hooks, rope, glass baubles, rusted keys, etc. The store is small, but a great job done on atmosphere and goods selection.
Its rare that I feel this way, but I felt a child-like excitement and wonderment when I first entered the Pirate Store, and that is a really special thing. -
Review from Ashley I.
San Francisco, CA
2/21/2012
Just started volunteering with the after school tutoring program here. Freaking wonderful even though my kid handed about 2 weeks worth of homework to be turned in tomorrow. A struggle, yes but worth getting out of bed for. We didn't finish but we got as close as we could before the center closed. I'll be back again soon.
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Review from Bob K.
9/16/2011 2 photos
A place for all ages and tastes. No really - piracy clearly bridges the great divides between generations, refinement, culture, everything. We all want to steal shiny stuff, and do it with style. And this is the place to get yourself outfitted for such a venture.
No, seriously, this is a way-bitching cool place that I could bring all three kids to, and have them all be fascinated by the stuff therein. I do not exclude myself, having purchased a snarky star chart. True, Allergy Boy spent the entire visit scribing his love for the Phillies in the pirate log book, but at least he got a shiny souvenir in barter for it. That's the ethos of this place. Oh, and give them exact change, and watch their faces alight with ecstacy. But I digress.
Go here, and poke around. Shopping here is interactive. You have to open those drawers, lift those lids, prod that lard, sift that sand, to find the good stuff. Then go next door, and look at all the dead stuff (but that's another review). -
Review from Lisa Q.
6/27/2011 10 Check-ins Here
A great store filled with quirky products for pirates as well as mind-pirates.
All of the money you spend fuels programs to help kids learn how to write better. Yeah baby, it's a sweet little shack for a non-profit organization. We bought a really soft and comfy t-shirt.
It's run by Dave Eggers so you'll find your favorite lit zines like "The Believer," "McSweeney's," and "Lucky Peach" for sale.
The kids can come in and dig for treasure in a sand pit--- they're allowed to keep whatever they find if they tell the cashier a joke or do any other sort of performance. I saw a little cutie redheaded boy say some joke about turtles that I now forget, but I do remember how extremely happy he was.
Keep kids giggly and their minds active, support the wondrous 826 Valencia! -
Review from Markus N.
Thank you Mr. Eggers, for making this all possible. For making the treasure chest. You didn't make the treasure, but without a chest it'd be scattered under beaches, in dragon's lairs, at the bottom of the sea.
My friends have lent a hand on these decks; I've not. Whilst visiting the other day I wondered over whether they'd have me. I have a shred of imagination left. I could bury it here.
This place is special for so many reasons. First and foremost its mission, followed closely by the almost criminally novel front of the house. Again, as I've only been in front I can only accurately speak to this aspect with accuracy. The other aspect I can only offer with imprecision (reverential imprecision).
There is a drawer in the stateroom wall marked Thumps. In it are wooden mallets. There are puppets and floats and all manner nets from the ceiling. Admire them too closely and you'll be mopped.
Pile upon pile of booty and guides to the pirate's way are distributed about the shoppe, fine gifts for those you left wet-eyed on the dock. The pirate's way is a lonely way.
826 is on a stretch of Valencia with bookstores and storefronts with the most delectable selection of randomness. It's like a dream, really. The one you have after eating a half-pound burger right before bed. Delphina is around the corner almost, so you can get your shop on with an angel in your belly.
Perhaps could keep you protected from the brigands that await.
It's really lovely. You have to go. -
Review from Elizabeth M.
San Francisco, CA
6/10/2011
While strolling The Mission one day, I stumbled upon this fascinating, little oddity - a pirate supply store and tutoring center in one. Described by David Byrne as "one of the top five pirate stores I've been to recently (love it!)," this store is filled with all manners of pirate necessities. Here you can pick up anything from an eye patch to a spy glass. So much fun!
If you're in the Mission, be sure to stop in 826 for a few chuckles at this truly original spot. -
Review from Lorrayne L.
Oakland, CA
I need to finish writing about my adventure in the Mission district. I've put it off for far too long, but books and work and classes and a social life can do that to a girl. So here goes.
The Commodore first mentioned the pirate store to me, after discovering my love of all things piratey. But we never went, and finally C_ and I made plans to go raiding and looting afore Blackbeard's Ball. We went. I went. I fell in love. Carl the puffer fish fell in love with himself. (By the by, don't ask a girl to marry you in front of him. I heard he gets a might bit jealous, and it's in the rules. See photo.)
This site of vast patronage has a history to it, one that had decidedly to do with zoning regulations. I won't bore you with the details, but I learned from C_ that the store was only a front; that the real treasure was behind the store to promote learning for children. There was a poetry reading going on when we visited. Truly marvelous, and I applaud those who work so hard to do that for today's youth. We need it bad!
The pirate store itself is a trove of fun items that make you think, trinkets to buy if you can understand what it's for, and knick knacks to make you smile. After a thorough browsing, I departed with a pair of red pirate socks (which I wore to the Ball) and a d12 depicting body parts for my brother-in-law's birthday. Whilst there, I got hit with the net twice! lol. Beware where thou standeth nearest the hostess.
If you brave the Mission district with its hipsters and crazy people, I urge you to come visit this store, And when you're done, journey to the store adjacent by the name of Paxton. Another store full of wonderful treasures beyond imagining. -
Review from Cattie P.
San Jose, CA
8/22/2011
I was mopped. It's true. And I liked it.
This is just the neatest place! My friend and I spent several minutes hanging out in the fish cave today, reading the vignettes on the walls and chatting with Otka the puffer fish. Whatever whimsical music they were playing really made it a perfect little day.
There are so many drawers to explore and adventures to go on here. Find surprises in the sand, buy a jar of sea salt or sea pepper (it stands to reason this would exist!), or possibly be pranked by the mischievous employees... :)
826 Valencia is wonderful. I'm planning on looking into volunteering with the young writers' program when I move out here; it looks really awesome. Can't wait to go back. -
Review from Jay V.
San Francisco, CA
8/16/2011
This place cracks me up every time I go in there. I love that the storefront is so entertaining and kitchy, and also functions as the "store's front." It's obviously not just a pirate store, but a place where kids can get help with their writing.
I'm not sure I can say anything that hasn't been said yet about this wonderful store. 826 has made me weep with laughter and excited to bring friends in whenever possible. Cleaver wordplay, puns and quips galore. It's just fun... and educational. -
Review from Keilin H.
3/28/2011
I'm going to commit to a life of thievery & drinking rum all day because a pirate's life is for me!!
I'm one of those people that like to touch things, pick them up, examine them. I go into a toy store, "Ohh a stuffed animal!" Pick it up. A cool looking perfume bottle is on display at Macy's. Screw off the lid and smell it. You get the point. There have been so many instances where the salesperson gives me a dirty look or tells me "Ah! Ah! No touching!"
You do NOT have to worry about that here! There are so many drawers to open and things to see and signs to read...it's GREAT! It's like my brain was on an adrenaline rush trying to take everything in!
From the drawer full of hammers to the wooden container of lard (apparently it's a great moisturizer!) to the mirrors with bits of hair on it to check out what you look like with a new 'stache, 826 Valencia is pure quirky fun!
There's a fish tank in this little "cave" area, so if you need to take a break from looting booty, it's nice and dark and people probably wouldn't mind if you took a quick nap.
Another freakin' amazing thing about this place is that they have writing programs for kids 8-18. There are a bunch of workshops you can go to, afterschool tutoring, field trips. Their belief that "writing skills are fundamental to future success and that great leaps in learning can be made when skilled tutors work one-on-one with students" is right on! All the money from selling the random pirate stuff goes right back into their writing programs! I wish I was young enough to be part of the program...they do take volunteers and there are internships, so you may be able to participate after all! :) -
Review from Soda Pop C.
Boston, MA
3/7/2011
I.don't.understand.
It's a pirate store, it's art, it's a writing center, it's full of stuff you don't need but want, it's a little kid's wildest dream, it's 826 Valencia. -
Review from Thom H.
San Francisco, CA
3/8/2011
Avast ye! I'm fairly certain the vast majority of pirates are illiterate, but I'm glad to see that this particular crew is doing their part to promote creative writing. I'm also happy to have found a place where I can satisfy all my eye patch, peg leg and lard needs. You'd be surprised how hard it is to find a quality peg leg in the city.
Anyway, I have timbers to shiver and all that. Arrrrrrr!!! -
Review from cherie c.
10/27/2010
I am a big fan and a supporter of the 826 model, and I was long overdue a visit to the mothership at 826 Valencia. I've volunteered in other cities and visited a few of the other offbeat storefronts. So my SF trip could not be complete without a trip to the Pirate Supply Store.
What a fun place. I got to see the fish tank where Karl once lived. I got a cool t-shirt. I browsed citrus, glass eyes, and peg legs. I even 'absent-mindedly wandered' over to a display so that a very excited little boy could 'mop' me with the secret release rope.
I'm happy to spend money here to support the great tutoring and workshops that 826 presents. Arr! -
Review from P G.
Palo Alto, CA
2/26/2012 5 photos
Just go and check this pirate store out!!!!!!
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Review from Jennifer P.
San Francisco, CA
4/2/2011 1 Check-in Here
While I do not need anything in this store, and doubt I ever will. I do know someone who would love to stop by, and when she visits I'll be sure to bring her here!
That said. It's still fun to meander through the shop. The lard bin was slightly disturbing to me, but that's just me.
I really fancied the drawer-wall, though I wish I was able to get into the ones that were higher up. -
Review from Ben B.
Three words you'll never hear at 826 Valencia: "Don't touch that."
C'mon. A pirate store? Are you KIDDING me, San Francisco? That's just too cool. With bottled scurvy, eye-patch fitting recommendations, buried treasure and periscopes, this place is enough to send me spinning back to six-year-old me. Almost everything in this shop is interactive, quirky, hilarious, and entertaining.
I mean...it's a PIRATE store for god's sake. If you can't get excited about that, you have a bigger situation on your hands. -
Review from Myla A.
San Francisco, CA
3/14/2011
Avast me mateys!
Minus half a star, because I wish they had MORE pirate stuff, but PLUS half the star again because the profit from the treasures sold in the store goes back into their youth writing program. You can find treasures like rings, tomes of pirate tales, and loaf in a can.
I took my brother here once who lives out of town, and I got to mop him!
My other wish is that I was young enough to reach into the cauldron of goodness, but take all your kid friends here for some goodness and fish theatrics! -
Review from d s.
San Francisco, CA
9/27/2007 ROTD 9/22/2008
In the venerable McSweeney's Lists tradition, I present to you
THE MOST COMMON ADJECTIVES USED TO DESCRIBE THE PIRATE STORE AT 826 VALENCIA
Plunderific
Superlafitte
Barbarytastic
Bluebeardy
Parrotic
Cutlassome
Bootylicious
Patchy
Schoonerlative
Beautiplank
Exemplarrrrrry
Scurvey-licious [(c) Bucky K]
Keeltastic [(c) Half Nelson M]
Hookeriffic [(c) Half Nelson M]
And you kids better take advantage of the writing tutors. BE GRATEFUL -- I wish I had that resource when I was younger.
Five stars for pirate supplies, sure. But five EXTRA stars for tutoring kids. Now let me commandeer your vessel.Listed in: I'm A Skinny Mission Hipster!
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Review from Kate V.
4/17/2009 ROTD 10/16/2009
If you've ever gotten ROTD on Yelp, you know that giddy feeling of exuberance and flight that can only be brought on by the unexpected, fleeting honor. Though the recognition and glory are gone in a mere 24 hours, who cares? It kind of rocks!
Now imagine: you're 16 years old. Never wrote a Yelp review in your life, don't even like writing very much. At school one day, you're encouraged to write your first full short story. You eventually get into it and end up working really hard on it. Within a few months time, your story is put in a book and you are a published author. Years later, you're still able to direct people to Amazon to find it.
Now which form of publication sounds sweeter? :)
Both are accomplishments in their own right, but especially if you've been recognized for the former, why not share your amazing writing talents in being part of the latter? Last winter I was privileged to participate in 826 Valencia's annual "Book Project," where high school English students write stories and essays to get published into a book. This year, Mission High School juniors and seniors reflected upon "the golden rule," and alongside the students, 826's dedicated staff, and my fellow tutors, I helped flesh out their work at the editorial board and copyediting phases. The hours upon hours of everyone's tireless work and efforts were celebrated at February's book release party, where I was honored to have my copy of "A Show of Hands" signed by dozens of its proud, excited young authors. I was as excited as they were.
826 Valencia, an organization that supports young people in developing their writing skills, is the perfect place for anyone who loves writing and kids to volunteer their time and talents. Opportunities include big undertakings like the book project, in-school tutoring at elementary and middle schools in the city, drop-in afterschool and weekend tutoring, school "field trips" where students write and bind a book in 2 short hours (!), and various workshops for both youth and adults. Because I'm on a 8-5 work schedule during the week, I don't get to work as directly with the kids as I would like (hoping to start the weekend tutoring soon). However, I've still had a decent, manageable number of opportunities to get involved in the community, meet other people passionate about writing, and make a difference in young people's lives.
826 is truly a wonderful, unique place, and it is my pleasure to dedicate my 200th Yelp review to it. It's also fronted by a pirate store... arrr!!!Listed in: R to the izzO, T to the Dizzay
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Review from Keane L.
1/19/2007
Yar. I love pirates. They are certainly better than ninjas. Here are the reasons:
-Pirates have big ships
-Disneyland has no rides for ninjas
-Pirates yo ho ho with a bottle of rum
-3 Ninjas Knuckle Up was a stupid movie
-Wenches
(At 826, you can get accessories to go with four of the five listed above. The store is filled with pirate gear from maps to keys. There's even a secret trap mechanism inside the store near the X on the floor...)
These are the reasons why pirates are better than ninjas, with an exception made for Ninja Gaiden. End yar. -
Review from Michelle S.
Oakland, CA
7/3/2009
I don't care how Mission Hipster and Stuffwhitepeoplelikedotcom it is of me to like Dave Eggers. I love him. LOVE HIM. Aside from being an amazing author and an amazing man, he goes through great lengths to help underprivileged urban kids learn how to write in these nifty little nonprofits that also happen to be cute little stores. It's almost like the "Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good and Wanna Learn to do Other Stuff Good Too." But real. And with better grammar.
It is embarrassing that I only just recently visited this place. I mean, I've already been to the superhero one in Brooklyn! http://static.px.yelp.... And now, I finally visited this one.
So, take a class, buy some peg leg oil and eye patches, or a cute pirate onesie. Or, better yet, some local authors. That's right SF, Armistead Maupin and Dave Eggers aren't the only local authors. 826 has several for sale. And most of them just happen to be between the ages of 6 - 18...and they are precious.
Don't drive, you yellow-bellied land-lubbers; it's by 16th & Mission BART.Listed in: Allow me to entertain you....
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Review from Amanda C.
San Francisco, CA
6/1/2008
I GOT MOPPED!!!!!!!!! If you don't know then I'm not telling you but I was both shocked and, most of all, honored.
This place is absolutely amazing. "San Francisco's Only Independently Owned Pirate Supply Store" as described to us by the person up front. Secretly it is a reading and writing tutoring program for kids ages 6 - 18 offering free programs for kids.
Not to sound too redundant but this place is just amazing. I felt like a little kid when I ran around the store timidly opening all the obscurely named drawers looking at glass eyes, feathers, hidden treasure and a belt that could double as a ladder (rope). They sell both the very inventive McSweeney's Quarterly and the 826 Quarterly which were both awesome to read.
Please donate all your money and time to this place since it's run by volunteers. KTHNXBAI!!! (Ugh I never know how to end reviews)Listed in: You're a tourist but I love…
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Review from Donna Z.
12/31/2008
Normally I have a thing against stores that front. You know, the stores that couldn't possibly just be what they seem...it's a crazy facade that no one believes. "Massage parlor", my ass.
826 Valencia is the best front EVER.
It's a pirate-y, literary, costume-y gem of a store...in the FRONT.
In the back is where it's really at. (In a wholesome, strictly non-"massage" sense).
All pirate-y proceeds fund the writing & tutoring center behind all the pirate gear. Kids ages 6 to 18 get the support they need (free of charge) to improve their basic and creative writing skills. Be still, my English-major heart!
826 Valencia, I support you! -
Review from Stephanie W.
Arlington, VA
2/7/2010
826 Valencia is much more than it appears. It is not a retail shop specializing in Pirate themed merchandise (although that is a nice added bonus), but a tutoring center for kids. It does everything to inspire a love of the written word for the entire community. For that, I feel their mission is so necessary and has so much of an impact today.
I have applied to begin volunteering at 826 Valencia, but for now I will review my enjoyment of the pirate store. I love the drawers of glass balls and colorful scarves and salt and coins and keys and buttons. It's like going treasure hunting every time I'm in the store. They have a selection of fun T shirts and every book ever published through McSweeneys. Yesterday I bought their classic 826 tshirt, a bottle of sepia colored ink and a new McSweeneys book I have yet to read.
The volunteer staff is always so helpful, Karl the pufferfish provides endless amusement, and where else can you find a peg leg sizing chart? Whenever you and your maties come ashore next, be sure to stock up on all your supplies at 826 Valencia. I challenge you to find a better pirate supply store anywhere else.
Yo ho ho. Aaaarrrr Maties.Listed in: I Left my Heart in San…
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Review from Berna T.
3/16/2008
Seriously - a pirate store? Really? As in, "Shiver me timbers, matey! Avast! Land ho!"
Aye, it is indeed.
I have a strange fascination with pirates, stemming from the first visit to the Pirates of the Caribbean ride in Disneyland when I was 5 years old. Then Johnny Depp was cast as Captain Jack Sparrow, and ever since then, I liken pirates to the rock stars of their time - dirty, dangerous, and doing whatever the hell they want to, whenever they want.
But I digress.
This store was absolutely mesmerizing - you didn't know where to look! All kinds of curious oddities and funny little treasures stacked and arranged in a tiny space, made to look somewhat like the inner sanctum of a ship's hull. There was standard pirate gear - gold/silver pieces, stockings, hats, eye patches, jewelry, glass bottles. Some of the things were crazy - like the giant vat of lard situated near the register. I really didn't know what to make of that. Um....are you making tortillas over here or something?
Definitely a place to browse and just get lost in. Apparently they tutor kids in the back too, which must be quite amazing for these kids - I mean, wouldn't YOU want to go and do your homework on a pirate ship? -
Review from Steph P.
Minneapolis, MN
7/26/2007
Stumbling into 826 Valencia in a bit of a disoriented state, my visitors and I were thoroughly puzzled to find a store full of pirate stuff. Is this stuff actually for sale? Is that *really* a huge tub of lard?
All I know is that this store is a lot of fun to wander around. Oh, and that it is actually a front for an awesome children and young adult's writing workshop program created by Dave Eggers. Perhaps this bucket of lard I now have sitting next to me will help some kid become the next great American author. Cool.Listed in: Playing Tour Guide
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Review from Quinn S.
12/19/2006
What the hell could be better than this? It's a pirate supply store in the mission that uses the allure of the open seas to trick kids into learning to read and write.
It's what the Derek Zoolander Center For Children Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too could have been if only it were bigger, founded by Dave Eggers and disguised as a pirate store in a fun neighborhood.
I think their inventory is improved of late, and last time I went in to buy an eye patch, I heard my name called from the back, and one of my former students was volunteering as a tutor. Gracie, you rock!
ps. The PIRATE PROM is the party of the year! Trust me. -
Review from Christopher K.
San Francisco, CA
1/6/2009
This stretch of Valencia houses some of the greatest boutique shops in San Francisco. Among them lies one of particular repute, innocuously named "826 Valencia". No one would know this is a shopping resource for those who dedicate their lives to plunder.
Pirates. Marauders. Buccaneers! Scalawags of the high seas! This is your premier shopping destination.
This store is an excellent resource for all your glass eye needs. If you're too cheap for a glass eye, try their dazzling array of eye patches. They also feature a fine array of mops. As your captain is surely fond of reminding you, those decks aren't going to swab themselves.
The true secret of this place is the hidden back room. Yes, my friends. Circle close and I will share a secret with you. The store, while extensive in its selection, is merely a front operation for something far more nefarious and undermining of today's pirate culture. That's education. You see, 826 Valencia's true purpose is to provide afterschool writing workshops for young people. Those looking to get ahead or those looking to catch up can come here to learn in a fostering and progressive environment.
So why would I say that something so positive as education is nefarious to the pirate culture? As many a captain will tell you, a learned crew is a mutinous crew. It's better to keep the boys up front shopping for wooden legs than learning to read and write. -
Review from Wes M.
San Francisco, CA
11/5/2007
Did that many people really propose in the fish theater? Genius!
If you only go to one quirky shop in the Mission, make it 826 Valencia. It's a pirate store, of course, but it's so much more than that; it's a reminder of those childhood days of whimsy and wonder. In fact, it's hard to believe someone actually put in the effort to make this place--it sounds like a "brilliant idea" I would ponder briefly in a daydream before letting it disappear over the horizon. So you've got to give them credit for follow-through. But be warned: like all nostalgia trips, it can be bittersweet. It might make you feel like a kid again, or it might make you realize just how much you've changed since those days when the pirate stories were far more alive than the sleepy, easily ignored "real" world. Or maybe they just make a very heady first impression.
Also, be sure to also check out the equally curious Paxton Gate next door. Between the two of them you'll find all the wonders of land and sea you need.Listed in: 16th & Mission
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Review from Mason G.
San Francisco, CA
5/27/2009
A couple of weeks ago a couple of telegraph hill parrots migrated their way onto my balcony and decided to make it their new home (rents are cheap where I live... You can get an entire balcony for birdseed!)
Well, after I discovered my adorable red headed neighbors, I quickly sprang into action! But to my dismay, not a stitch of pirate regalia was to be seen in the entire apartment! Not even a loose eye-patch!
As you can imagine, I was severely depressed for days... And then I was wandering around the mission, and, AVAST! Thar she be, maety! An entire store dedicated to the pirating arts. Thank the ghost of Davey Jones that this place exists. Now I'm all prepared to return to my parrots and begin a new life as scourge of the mission bay! -
Review from Jay H.
3/16/2007
I'm opting out of the Pirate jokes...this review is about ONE THING!!
FAKE MICE!!!! Not rats...MICE!!
All nasty!!!
You have all seen mice. You know their coloring!! Disgusto!!
Have you ever had mice in your house? You know that dirty filthy feeling you get all over your body? You hug yourself in an attempt to get that cold creepy feeling to go away. Nasty little mice in your building, crawling all around the inside of your walls. Only to wait until darkness falls when the sound of normal living doesn't drown out their scratching and they venture outside. Looking for food. Searching everywhere for a crumb to eat. You can see them crawling around the floor zooming back and forth climbing over anything in their way to get to food. The mouse somehow gets on your bed at night and crawls around and into your hair and on your body! Their long skinny wormy tails touching your face!!!EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWWEEWE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I FUCKING HATE MICE!!!!!! Nasty little shits!!!
The best part though...is that EVERYONE hates mice!! (yes, Laura...even you have to hate mice!)
So come here and buy fake mice and scare the shit out of that co-worker you hate, or put it on your roommate's face or shoes when they leave their dirty dishes in the sink, or mail it to your ex's new gf.
Excuse me...I have to go scrub myself...this review made me feel dirty.Listed in: Some of my faves...
