7-Eleven Stores

 

293

282

Suge K.

San Francisco, CA

This is a great place to come. If you want to get shot. Or stabbed. Or hit on by the guys that own the store. Or have your drunk ass college roommate stick issues of "The National Enquirer" down your pants as you're sober, standing in line trying to pay for stuff.

But whatever you do, DO NOT make fun of pigs feet in this place. The following happened (too many years ago to mention) when I was in college and in the store with my friend - please note, we may or may not have been stoned out of our minds at the time.

Me: "Hey, you know what's really good?"

Friend: "Those pigs feet?"

Me: "No, these cookies. Yum!"

Fast forward, we're at the counter. Me and my whitey whiterson private school boy friend. A man from the nearby ghetto walks up and is at the register next to us as we're waiting for one of the clerks to get my friend one of those nasty-ass hot dogs.

Clerk (to the guy next to us): "Will that be all?"

Guy next to us: "No (shoots us dirty look). I want these pigs feet too. (slams jar on the counter and looks at us) You got a problem with that?"

Friend: "No, sir, I was just wondering, though. How does one eat pigs feet?"

Guy next to us: "How does one eat pigs feet? I'll bend you over and open this jar with your ass and show you."

Friend: "Uh, no thanks, I'm really not THAT interested."

(P.S.  I think the irony of a person who eats 7-eleven hot dogs making fun of a person who eats pigs feet was lost on all parties involved.)

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